零距离美语会话[家庭]Lesson 4:International Marriage

Four     International Marriage.

涉外婚姻

 1   Introduction
A  Perhaps more than ever before, people from very different cultures marry each other. Such intercultural  and interracial marriages have been more common in countries like America and Canada where people from all over the world live, work, and study together. These relationships often have hidden problems and surprising benefits. 
不同文化间的人结婚也许已大大超出了往常。这种不同文化、不同人种间的婚姻在像美国、加拿大这种有来自世界各地的人在此生活、工作、学习的国家已经变得很普遍了。这些关系经常隐藏危机，也有出乎意料的好处。
B Every marriage requires commitment¹, dedication² and work. An international / intercultural marriage requires even more attention because of the many obstacles³ that a couple faces.  The obstacles come from family, friends, personal values, expectations, and bureaucratic⁴ procedures⁵.  To overcome these barriers, intercultural couples need to learn about one another's cultures, accept that cultural roots go deep and that people don't change easily or quickly.  And most important, they need to focus on the positives and talk with one another about which traditions they want to carry on as a couple and with their children.
每一个婚姻都需要有承诺，都需要付出努力。由于涉外婚姻夫妻面对着很多障碍，所以需要更加用心。障碍有来自家庭的，朋友的，还有个人价值观不同，期待不同，以及官方手续。要克服这些障碍，涉外婚姻夫妻需要了解对方文化，并要接受由于这种文化根底深，人是不容易或者很快改变的。最重要的是，他们需要看到那些好的方面，互相商量看作为夫妻以及小孩以后想继续采用哪一种传统。

 2   Sample Sentences
1. I think that anyone considering marrying a foreigner needs to look at things very closely⁶ before doing so.
我觉得任何选择和老外结婚的人都应该在此之前仔细地看清楚这件事。
2.  Marriage to someone from a different country does require some extra effort.
和一个异国他乡的人结婚真的是需要更多的努力。
3.  It can be worth the effort however.
然而这份努力也可能是很值得的。
4.  Couples have said that the first five years of this type of marriage are the hardest.
有夫妻说过这种类型的婚姻前5年是最难的。
5.  The key to a successful intercultural marriage is to develop understanding and patience.
一个成功的涉外婚姻最关键的就是要培养理解与耐心。
6.   It isn't easy to deal with the legacy⁷ that we've all grown up with in our ethnic⁸, religious and socio-economic backgrounds.
要处理好我们在这种民族、信仰和社会经济环境下长大所受到的影响是不容易的。
7.  Do you ever feel the fear of abandonment by your family, friends and your spouse⁹?
你有没有过怕被你的家人、朋友和你的配偶抛弃的恐惧心理？
8.  How would you describe your intercultural marriage?
你怎么描述你的涉外婚姻？
9.  Understanding the diversity of cultures and traditions in one another's past can enhance¹⁰ a marriage relationship.
理解另外一个人过去不同的文化与传统可以改善你的婚姻关系。
10.  Although there can be many problems in these international marriage relationships, they can also be very successful.
尽管在这种国际婚姻关系中有很多问题，但是它们还是可以很成功的。
11.  I've been married for almost 3 years, and never once regretted it.
我结婚快3年了，但我从未后悔过。

 3   Conversations
1.   Two women are talking about intercultural marriage.
A.  You are married to a foreigner, huh?  So what’s it like?
B.  Well, the first year of our marriage, we had great difficulty getting along.  The things that are important to me are not important to him. We had a lot of conflicts1.
A.  Yeah, I know what you mean.  The first year of any marriage is difficult for all couples, not to mention two people from different cultures. 
B. And now we have a two-year-old boy.  We’re very happy that he’s healthy and smart.
A. Oh, so he’s half Chinese and half American.  That’s unusual.  What languages does he speak, then?
B. Right now he speaks mostly Chinese, and he can say a few English words.  But he will learn.
A.  What does he look like?  Can people tell?
B.  Yes, people surely can.  He’s whiter than the Chinese kids, and his hair is a little blonde.  My husband says his eyes are very Chinese though.

【译文】
——你跟一个老外结婚了，是吗？那么是个什么样？
——嗯，我们结婚的第一年，我们很难相处。对我来说重要的事对他来说又不重要。我们有过很多冲突。
——是，我知道你什么意思。结婚的第一年对任何夫妻来说都很难，更不用说是两个来自不同文化的人。
——而且现在我们有了一个两岁的男孩。我们很高兴他很健康、很聪明。
——噢，那么他是一半中国血统、一半美国血统。那很不寻常。那他讲什么语言？
——现在他主要讲中文，他只会说几个英文单词。但是他会学。
——他长得怎么样？别人看得出来吗？
——能，别人当然能看出来。他比其他中国小孩白，头发有点金黄。但我丈夫说他的眼睛很像中国人的。

1. An interculture couple are talking about relatives visiting without warning.
A:  Well, I can’t believe your uncle and aunt came to stay with us for a week, and they did not even call us in advance2.
B:  John, they are old-fashioned¹¹ people from the Chinese countryside. That’s their custom.
A:  I know, but it is hard for me to get used to your relatives coming to visit us, and without warning.
B:  Don’t your relatives visit other relatives?
A:  Yes, but Americans never visit without calling in advance, and they almost never stay overnight¹².
B:  I think that maybe Chinese families are closer than your families.
A:  I think you’re right!
【译文】
——嗯，我真不敢相信你的叔叔和姑妈和我们住了一个星期，甚至他们都没有提前打个招呼。
——约翰，他们是从中国农村来的老年人。那是他们的习俗。
——我知道，但是对我来说很难适应你的亲戚来看我们，连个招呼都不打。
——你的亲戚难道不去看望其他亲戚的吗？
——去啊，但是美国人从不事先不打个电话就去的，而且几乎都不过夜。
——我觉得也许中国家庭比你们的家庭要亲密很多。
——我想你说得没错！

 

3.  Tired of Western food.
A:  Sally, I’m tired of this Western food. I really miss my mother’s Sichuan cooking.
B:  I’m sure you do miss that type of cooking. But can’t you try to get used to Western food?
A:  I have tried. But Americans like butter, bread, sugar, and cream too much.
B:  I suppose you’re right, Lee. Maybe that’s why so many Westerners are overweight3.
A:  It’s interesting that Americans work very hard at their jobs, do not take naps4 during the day, and yet they can be so heavy.
B:  You see, because we are often busy working, we eat too much fast food, and that food is very fattening5.

【译文】   
——莎利，这些西餐我真吃腻了。我真想念我妈妈做的四川菜。
——我知道你肯定很想念那种口味的菜。但是你难道不能试着适应吃西餐吗？
——我都试过了。但是美国人太喜欢黄油、面包、白糖和奶油了。
——我想你说得对，李。也许那就是为什么这么多西方人超重。
¬——很有趣，美国人工作很卖力，白天又不打盹，而他们还可以这么胖。
——你想，因为我们工作经常很忙，所以我们吃快餐吃得很多，而那些食物又很容易使人发胖。

4.  Money problems.
A:  Calvin, how much money did you spend last weekend?
B:  Lily, I’m not sure. Let me check, I think I spent $50.
A:  Why don’t you help me save money? You are always spending money.
B:  I know that I should learn how to save more, but I hope that we can spend a little on ourselves sometimes.
A:  I’m sorry. I guess I’m too extreme when it comes putting money in the bank.
B:  That’s okay. I’m sorry, too. It’s a good idea to prepare for the future possibilities.

 【译文】
——加尔文，上个周末你花了多少钱？
——莉莉，我不太清楚。我算算，我想我花了50美元。
——你怎么不帮我省钱？你老是花钱。
——我知道我应该学会节省钱，但是我希望有时候我们可以花一点点钱在我们自己身上。
——对不起。一说起把钱存进银行，我想我太过分了。
——没关系。我也有愧。为将来做好准备，这是好的。

4    Words and Expressions 
1. conflict   冲突, 抵触
2. in advance  事先; 预先
3. overweight  超重的; 过重的
4. nap  打盹儿, 小睡
5. fattening   用于养肥的

1 commitment   

n.奉献，忠诚，辛劳，委托，实行，承担义务，赞助

参考例句：

• The builder had a commitment to finish the work on time.那个承建商答应过准时完工。
• He made a commitment to pay the rent on time.他保证按时付房租。

2 dedication   

n.奉献，献身，致力，题献，献辞

参考例句：

• We admire her courage,compassion and dedication.我们钦佩她的勇气、爱心和奉献精神。
• Her dedication to her work was admirable.她对工作的奉献精神可钦可佩。

3 obstacles   

n. 干扰；障碍

参考例句：

• I think most of these obstacles can be surmounted. 我认为这些障碍大多数都是可以克服的。
• There's no formidable obstacles in the world. 世上没有无法逾越的障碍。

4 bureaucratic   

adj.官僚的，繁文缛节的

参考例句：

• The sweat of labour washed away his bureaucratic airs.劳动的汗水冲掉了他身上的官气。
• In this company you have to go through complex bureaucratic procedures just to get a new pencil.在这个公司里即使是领一支新铅笔，也必须通过繁琐的手续。

5 procedures   

程序； 手续； 步骤； 常规； 程序( procedure的名词复数 )； 手续； [计算机]过程； （为解决一个特殊问题而专门设计的）文字程序

参考例句：

• procedures that must be followed to ensure full compliance with the law 为确保严格遵守法律所必须遵行的程序
• You need to become fully conversant with the company's procedures. 你得对公司的程序了如指掌。

6 closely   

adv.紧密地；严密地，密切地

参考例句：

• We shall follow closely the development of the situation.我们将密切注意形势的发展。
• The two companies are closely tied up with each other.这两家公司之间有密切联系。

7 legacy   

n.遗产，遗赠；先人(或过去)留下的东西

参考例句：

• They are the most precious cultural legacy our forefathers left.它们是我们祖先留下来的最宝贵的文化遗产。
• He thinks the legacy is a gift from the Gods.他认为这笔遗产是天赐之物。

8 ethnic   

adj.人种的，种族的，异教徒的

参考例句：

• This music would sound more ethnic if you played it in steel drums.如果你用钢鼓演奏，这首乐曲将更具民族特色。
• The plan is likely only to aggravate ethnic frictions.这一方案很有可能只会加剧种族冲突。

9 spouse   

n.配偶(指夫或妻)

参考例句：

• Her spouse will come to see her on Sunday.她的丈夫星期天要来看她。
• What is the best way to keep your spouse happy in the marriage?在婚姻中保持配偶幸福的最好方法是什么？

10 enhance   

vt.提高（强度、力量、数量等），增加（进）

参考例句：

• BBC backing for the scheme will enhance its credibility.英国广播公司对这一计划的支持将提高其可信度。
• Good secretarial skills should enhance your chances of getting a job.出色的秘书工作技能会增加你找工作的机会。

11 old-fashioned   

adj.旧式的，保守的，挑剔的

参考例句：

• Why do you still dress in an old-fashioned mode?你为什么还穿款式陈旧的衣服？
• Here is an old-fashioned pump for drawing water from a well.这里有一个旧式水泵可从井里抽水。

12 overnight   

ad.前一天晚上，一夜间 a.前一天晚上的

参考例句：

• She stayed overnight in the hotel. 她在旅馆过了一夜。
• Our success is not won overnight. 我们的成功不是一夜之间得来的。