四六级必读美文系列:别叫我“亲爱的”

 　　Life's daily challenges are tough enough without having to deal with the little annoyances¹ that chip away at our fragile well being. For me, one of them is being addressed as "sweetie" or ‘hon' by complete strangers.

　　即使不必应付那些让我们脆弱的幸福感打了折扣的小烦恼，生活中每日面临的挑战也已经够大了。对我来说，有一个小烦d恼就是被一个全然不认识的人称为“亲爱的”或是“甜心”。

　　I get this regularly---from the coffee-cart vendor² or department store salesperson³, on the phone or at a doctor's office. Since when do strangers feel they can address others with such familiarity? It rankles⁴ that some of the people I get this from are young enough that I could pass for their mother---that is, if I had had kids early. (1) I understand the attempts to be friendly or convey warmth, but would the salesperson or vendor addressing me as I stand before them in a suit do the same to a man next to me dressed similarly? Somehow I doubt it.

　　我经常被卖咖啡的小贩或百货商店售货员这么叫，在电话里或是在医生办公室里。从什么时候开始，陌生人感觉他们可以用这样熟稳的称呼叫别人的?更让人可恼的是，有些这么称呼我的人还很年轻，我够当他们的妈妈了一一如果我早点生了孩子的话。 (1)我明白这些人试图表现得亲切或是表示对你的热情，但是如此称呼站在他们面前西装革履的我的售货员，会对我旁边同样西装革履的男人也这样称呼吗？我有点怀疑。

　　Is it a generational thing? Or a cultural disconnect? One colleague says she doesn't mind at a1l being ca1led "sweetie" because it makes her feel young. I guess I'm of the Jane Austen school of social conduct that believes "sir" and "madam，""please" and "pardon me" are proper forms of address in daily discourse⁵. I say "excuse me", "madam" or "sir"， "could you please ..." when I have a question or need assistance. (2)Perhaps exaggerate, but I do sometimes worry that the increasing erosion of good manners I see every day or read about could spell the end of a civilized⁶ society.

　　是因为年代不同了吗？还是文化差异?我的一个同事说，她一点也不在意有人叫她“亲爱的”，因为这让她感觉自己很年轻。我猜我在社交行为准则上属于简·奥斯汀派，认为“先生”和“女士”，“请”和“对不起”是日常交流中适直的说法。我会在有问题或需要帮助时说"对不起，女士"或"先生，您能……" 0 (2)或许我夸大其词了，不过我有时真的担心，我每天看到的或是读到的礼貌举止的日益衰败可能预示着文明社会的终结。

　　A New York Times article last year detailed⁷ how being called "sweetie"or "dear" chips away at the dignity of older people. "Professionals call it elder speak，the sweetly belittling⁸ form of address that has always rankled⁹ older people," the article says. (3) The piece refers to studies showing "that the insults can have health consequences, especially if people mutely accept the attitudes behind them."

　　去年《纽约时报》上的一篇文章详细讲述了对年长的人来说，被称为“亲爱的”有损他们的尊严。文章中说，这种甜蜜但带有贬低色彩的称呼形式总会让年长的人感到恼怒。(3)文章引述了研究结果，说这显示出这种侮辱性称呼能带来健康问题，特别是如果人们默默地接受了称呼背后的态度时。

　　On several occasions, I speak up , asking others to refrain from addressing me with undue¹⁰ familiarity. Just tell me yes or no or provide help or point me to the right direction---no niceties or terms of endearment¹¹ necessary. Or please don't call me sweetie and just hand me the dam doughnut.

　　有几个场合，我会大声说出来，请别人不要用过于熟捻的称呼来叫我。干脆点，告诉我“是”还是“否”，提供帮助或给我指路，不需要亲切的称呼或是表示喜爱的词汇。请别称呼我“亲爱的”，干脆一点把那该死的甜甜圈拿给我。

　　Readers, what's your take on this? Do you mind being "sweetie-d" by strangers? Have you used these terms yourselves to casually¹² address people you don 't know? And in the spirit of Friday fun, what other little annoyances slow down your juggles¹³?

　　读者朋友们，你对此有何看法?你在意被陌生人称为"亲爱的"吗?你自己用这样的词称呼过陌生人吗?出于娱人娱己的精神，有其他让你厌恶的小事吗?

　　四六级句型讲解

　　1.I understand the attempts to be friendly or convey warmth. but would the salesperson or vendor addressing me as I stand before them in a suit do the same to a man next to me dressed similarly?

　　本句是一个复合句。主句是由but连接的两个并列的句子。在第二个句子的主干是would the salesperson or vendor do the same to a man。addressing me do the same to a man现在分词短语作后置定语修饰the salesperson or vendor, as引导时间状语从句。 next to me介词短语dressed similarly和过去分词短语作后置定语修饰man。

　　语法重点：分词短语作定语，时间状语从句，介词短语作定语

　　2. Perhaps I exaggerate, but I do sometimes worry that the increasing erosion of good manners I see every day or read about could spell the end of a civilized society.

　　本句是一个复合句。 that引导宾语从句，作worry的宾语。其中I see or read about是省略了引导词的宾语从句，修饰erosion of good manners。

　　语法重点：宾语从句，定语从句

　　3. The piece refers to studies showing "that the insults can have health consequences, especially if people mutely accept the attitudes behind them."

　　本句是一个复合句，主句是the piece refers to studies。showing that...behind them现在分词短语作后置定语，修饰 studies。其中that引导宾语从句，作show的宾语。If引导条件状语从句。

　　语法重点：分词短语作状语，宾语从句，条件状语从句

1 annoyances   

n.恼怒( annoyance的名词复数 )；烦恼；打扰；使人烦恼的事

参考例句：

• At dinner that evening two annoyances kept General Zaroff from perfect enjoyment one. 当天晚上吃饭时，有两件不称心的事令沙洛夫吃得不很香。 来自辞典例句
• Actually, I have a lot of these little annoyances-don't we all? 事实上我有很多类似的小烦恼，我们不都有这种小烦恼吗？ 来自互联网

2 vendor   

n.卖主；小贩

参考例句：

• She looked at the vendor who cheated her the other day with distaste.她厌恶地望着那个前几天曾经欺骗过她的小贩。
• He must inform the vendor immediately.他必须立即通知卖方。

3 salesperson   

n.售货员，营业员，店员

参考例句：

• A salesperson works in a shop.售货员在商店工作。
• Vanessa is a salesperson in a woman's wear department.凡妮莎是女装部的售货员。

4 rankles   

v.（使）痛苦不已，（使）怨恨不已( rankle的第三人称单数 )

参考例句：

• The noise that trunks and ambulances made in the street rankles me every day. 每天大街上卡车和救护车的噪音令我恼怒不已。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• Perhaps that is why the tardiness of my in-laws rankles me so. 大概就是因为这个缘故，每次我的亲戚迟到，总惹得我火冒三丈。 来自辞典例句

5 discourse   

n.论文，演说；谈话；话语；vi.讲述，著述

参考例句：

• We'll discourse on the subject tonight.我们今晚要谈论这个问题。
• He fell into discourse with the customers who were drinking at the counter.他和站在柜台旁的酒客谈了起来。

6 civilized   

a.有教养的，文雅的

参考例句：

• Racism is abhorrent to a civilized society. 文明社会憎恶种族主义。
• rising crime in our so-called civilized societies 在我们所谓文明社会中日益增多的犯罪行为

7 detailed   

adj.详细的，详尽的，极注意细节的，完全的

参考例句：

• He had made a detailed study of the terrain.他对地形作了缜密的研究。
• A detailed list of our publications is available on request.我们的出版物有一份详细的目录备索。

8 belittling   

使显得微小，轻视，贬低( belittle的现在分词 )

参考例句：

• We must be realistic in our self-estimation, neither being conceited nor belittling ourselves. 我们对自己的估计应该实事求是， 不要自高自大，也不要妄自菲薄。
• I find it belittling to be criticized by someone so much younger than me. 有个比我年轻许多的人批评了我，我觉得是小看了我。

9 rankled   

v.（使）痛苦不已，（使）怨恨不已( rankle的过去式和过去分词 )

参考例句：

• Her comments still rankled. 她的评价仍然让人耿耿于怀。
• The insult rankled in his mind. 这种侮辱使他心里难受。 来自《简明英汉词典》

10 undue   

adj.过分的；不适当的；未到期的

参考例句：

• Don't treat the matter with undue haste.不要过急地处理此事。
• It would be wise not to give undue importance to his criticisms.最好不要过分看重他的批评。

11 endearment   

n.表示亲爱的行为

参考例句：

• This endearment indicated the highest degree of delight in the old cooper.这个称呼是老箍桶匠快乐到了极点的表示。
• To every endearment and attention he continued listless.对于每一种亲爱的表示和每一种的照顾，他一直漫不在意。

12 casually   

adv.漠不关心地，无动于衷地，不负责任地

参考例句：

• She remarked casually that she was changing her job.她当时漫不经心地说要换工作。
• I casually mentioned that I might be interested in working abroad.我不经意地提到我可能会对出国工作感兴趣。

13 juggles   

v.歪曲( juggle的第三人称单数 )；耍弄；有效地组织；尽力同时应付（两个或两个以上的重要工作或活动）

参考例句：

• They brought back to my mind, in a flash, the three juggles. 他们顿时使我回想起那三个变戏法的。 来自辞典例句
• Our juggles are essentially built from relationships ─with our partners alz, coworkers and friends. 我们的事业和家庭实际上都是建立于各种关系之上的──与伴侣、孩子、同事和朋友的关系。 来自互联网