英文简历中不该出现的话

    致命的大错"Finished 8th in my high school graduating class of 10.""Qualifications: No education or experience.""I am relatively¹ intelligent, obedient and loyal as a puppy.""My compensation should be at least equal to my age.""Reason for Leaving: It had to do with the IRS, FBI and SEC.""Fired because I fought for lower pay.""Size of employer: Very tall, probably over 6'5" .
    " "Please disregard the enclosed resume-it is terribly out of date.""Reason for Leaving: My boss said the end of the world is near.""Reason for Leaving: The owner gave new meaning to the word 'paranoia².' I prefer to elaborate privately³."打字错误与语法错误"Here are my qualifications for you to overlook.""Strengths: Ability to meet deadlines while maintaining composer.""I am a rabid typist.""Work History: Performed brain wave tests,1879-1981.""After receiving advice from several different angels, I have decided⁴ to pursue a new line of work.""Accounting⁵ cleric.""As indicted⁶, I have over five years of experience analyzing⁷ investments.""Suspected to graduate early next year.""Disposed of $2.5 billion in assets.""Proven ability to track down and correct erors.""Accomplishments⁸: Oversight⁹ of entire department.""Am a perfectionist and rarely if if ever forget details.""Accomplishments: Completed 11 years of high school."不应有的幽默"Note: Keep this resume on top of the stack. Use all others to heat your house.""Assisted in daily preparation of large quantities of consumable items in a fast-paced setting." (Translation: Short-order cook.)"But wait...there's more. You get all this business knowledge plus a grasp of marketing¹⁰ that is second nature.""I have an excellent track record, although I am not a horse.""My fortune cookie said, 'Your next interview will result in a job'-and I like your company in particular.""Title: Another resume from the 'Profiles in Excellence¹¹' series.""Also Known As: Mr. Productivity, Mr. Clever, Mr.Fix-it.""Trustworthy references available upon request-if I give them a few bucks¹².""Let's meet so you can 'ooh' and 'ahh' over my experience."

1 relatively   

adv.比较...地，相对地

参考例句：

• The rabbit is a relatively recent introduction in Australia.兔子是相对较新引入澳大利亚的物种。
• The operation was relatively painless.手术相对来说不痛。

2 paranoia   

n.妄想狂，偏执狂；多疑症

参考例句：

• Her passion for cleanliness borders on paranoia.她的洁癖近乎偏执。
• The push for reform is also motivated by political paranoia.竞选的改革运动也受到政治偏执狂症的推动。

3 privately   

adv.以私人的身份，悄悄地，私下地

参考例句：

• Some ministers admit privately that unemployment could continue to rise.一些部长私下承认失业率可能继续升高。
• The man privately admits that his motive is profits.那人私下承认他的动机是为了牟利。

4 decided   

adj.决定了的，坚决的；明显的，明确的

参考例句：

• This gave them a decided advantage over their opponents.这使他们比对手具有明显的优势。
• There is a decided difference between British and Chinese way of greeting.英国人和中国人打招呼的方式有很明显的区别。

5 accounting   

n.会计，会计学，借贷对照表

参考例句：

• A job fell vacant in the accounting department.财会部出现了一个空缺。
• There's an accounting error in this entry.这笔账目里有差错。

6 indicted   

控告，起诉( indict的过去式和过去分词 )

参考例句：

• The senator was indicted for murder. 那位参议员被控犯谋杀罪。
• He was indicted by a grand jury on two counts of murder. 他被大陪审团以两项谋杀罪名起诉。

7 analyzing   

v.分析；分析( analyze的现在分词 )；分解；解释；对…进行心理分析n.分析

参考例句：

• Analyzing the date of some socialist countries presents even greater problem s. 分析某些社会主义国家的统计数据，暴露出的问题甚至更大。 来自辞典例句
• He undoubtedly was not far off the mark in analyzing its predictions. 当然，他对其预测所作的分析倒也八九不离十。 来自辞典例句

8 accomplishments   

n.造诣；完成( accomplishment的名词复数 )；技能；成绩；成就

参考例句：

• It was one of the President's greatest accomplishments. 那是总统最伟大的成就之一。
• Among her accomplishments were sewing,cooking,playing the piano and dancing. 她的才能包括缝纫、烹调、弹钢琴和跳舞。 来自《现代英汉综合大词典》

9 oversight   

n.勘漏，失察，疏忽

参考例句：

• I consider this a gross oversight on your part.我把这件事看作是你的一大疏忽。
• Your essay was not marked through an oversight on my part.由于我的疏忽你的文章没有打分。

10 marketing   

n.行销，在市场的买卖，买东西

参考例句：

• They are developing marketing network.他们正在发展销售网络。
• He often goes marketing.他经常去市场做生意。

11 excellence   

n.优秀，杰出，(pl.)优点，美德

参考例句：

• His art has reached a high degree of excellence.他的艺术已达到炉火纯青的地步。
• My performance is far below excellence.我的表演离优秀还差得远呢。

12 bucks   

n.雄鹿( buck的名词复数 )；钱；（英国十九世纪初的）花花公子；（用于某些表达方式）责任v.（马等）猛然弓背跃起( buck的第三人称单数 )；抵制；猛然震荡；马等尥起后蹄跳跃

参考例句：

• They cost ten bucks. 这些值十元钱。
• They are hunting for bucks. 他们正在猎雄兔。 来自《简明英汉词典》