英文幽默笑话：两个比目鱼问题

 Simon was an inveterate¹ fisherman, well known for exaggerating the size of the one that got away. But there came a day when he actually caught two enormous flounders. He immediately invited a few friends over to dine, then tried to figure out how best to serve the fish. If I use both, he told his wife, it will seem ostentatious. 

　　Why not serve a piece of each? she suggested. 

　　No, if I cut them up, nobody will believe I caught two giant flounders. Simon racked his brain. Then he had an idea. 

　　The guests were seated at the table when their host strode in with a platter, holding the biggest flounder they'd ever seen. Suddenly Simon stumbled and fell. Everyone cried out in dismay as the fish crashed to the floor, but Simon quickly brushed himself off. 

　　Dear, he called out to his wife, bring in the other flounder! 

　　西蒙是个老练的渔夫。人们都熟知他爱吹嘘跑掉的那条鱼的尺寸。但有一天他确实抓了两条极大的比目鱼。他立刻邀请几个朋友过来吃饭，然后着力搞清楚怎样上鱼。如果两条一起上，他对妻子说，好像有点炫耀之嫌了。 

　　何不两条鱼各上一块呢？他妻子建议道。 

　　不行，如果把两条鱼都切碎了，就不会有人相信我抓了两条大比目鱼了。西蒙绞尽了脑汁，终于想出了一个好办法。 

　　客人已在餐桌边就座完毕，这时主人大步地走进来，手里端着一个托盘，托盘上是一个他们所见过的最大的比目鱼。突然西蒙被什么东西绊了一下摔倒了。所有的人都惊慌地叫了起来，因为鱼在地板上摔得粉碎。但是西蒙迅速地摆脱了窘境。 

　　亲爱的，他对妻子喊道，把另一条鱼端上来！ 

1 inveterate   

adj.积习已深的，根深蒂固的

参考例句：

• Hitler was not only an avid reader but also an inveterate underliner.希特勒不仅酷爱读书，还有写写划划的习惯。
• It is hard for an inveterate smoker to give up tobacco.要一位有多年烟瘾的烟民戒烟是困难的。