轻松一刻：英语笑话

 　　空闲时刻，轻松一下。小编在这里跟大家分享几则英语幽默笑话，一起笑一笑~

　　Henry was from the United States and he had come to London for a holiday.

　　亨利是个美国人，他到伦敦来度假。

　　One day he was not feeling well, so he went to the clerk at the desk of his hotel and said,"I want to see doctor. Can you give me the name of a good one?"

　　有一天他感到身体不舒服，于是走到旅馆服务台对服务员说:“我想看病，你能给我推荐一位好医生吗?”

　　The clerk looked in a book and then said , "Dr. Kenneth Grey , 61010."

　　服务员查阅了一下本子，然后说:“肯尼思·格雷医生，61010。"

　　Henry said，"Thank yon very much. Is he expensive?"

　　亨利说:“非常感谢，他收费贵吗?”

　　"Well, "the clerk answered, "he always charges his patients two pounds for their first visit to him, and one pound and 50 pennies for later visits."

　　“喔，”服务员回答说:“他对初诊患者收费两英镑，复诊收费一点五英镑。”

　　Henry decided¹ to save 50 pennies, so when he went to see the doctor, he said，"I've come again,doctor."

　　亨利想节省五十便士，所以他去看病时对医生说:“我又来了，医生。”

　　For a few seconds the doctor looked at his face carefully without saying anything.

　　医生仔细端详着他的面孔，几秒钟没说话。

　　Then he nodded and said，"Oh，yes. "He examined him and then said, "Everything's going as it should do. Just continue with the medicine I gave you last time."

　　然后点点头说:“哦，是的。”给他做完检查以后，医生说:“病情发展正常。继续服用上次我给你开的药吧。”

　　英语幽默笑话

　　Student A: When do people talk least?

　　学生甲: 人们在什么时候说话最少?

　　Student B: In February.

　　学生乙: 在二月。

　　Student A: Why?

　　学生甲: 为什么呢?

　　Student B: Because February is the shortest month of a year.

　　学生乙: 因为二月是一年中最短的一个月。

　　Two guys recently dead were given the option to stay either in Heaven or Hell² fog the rest of their eternity³. They asked if it was OK to look around first, and to their surprise,it was.First, they went to Heaven. All nice guys were there, dressed in white they sat on clouds playing harp⁴. Quite a boring place, thought our heroes.

　　两个家伙死了之后，被允许选择是愿意呆在天堂还是地狱。他们提出能否到两个地方先观光一下，他们被允许了。首先他们来到了天堂。这里都是穿着白衣服看上去很正派的人，他们坐在白云上弹奏着竖琴。他们想:这是个多无聊的地方呀。

　　"Let' s go to Hell，”they said to each other.

　　“让我们下地狱吧，”他们互相商量着。

　　Hell turned out to be a completely different scene. It was all bars, casino and amusement parks. Free drinks for everyone and a lot of people having a real good  time.Back from Hell，the guys were asked to choose between Heaven and Hell. They both chose Hell.

　　他们来到了地狱，这里简直是一番完全不同的景色。那里有酒吧、赌场和游乐园。每个人都可以免费喝酒，所有的人都享受着他们真正的快乐时光。当他们从地狱回来以后，他们不得不在天堂和地狱之间做出选择。最后，他们都选择了下地狱。

　　Back in Hell, they were immediately scuffled in the back of a sub-surface car and driven to a coalmine. Someone gave them a shovel⁵ each and told them to start working.

　　回到了地狱之后，他们立即被送进了一辆矿井车的后座，然后驶向了一个煤矿井。有人给他们每人一个铲子，叫他们开始工作。

　　"What' s  this? The last time we were here the place was entirely⁶ different.”

　　“这是怎么回事?上次我们在这里的时候完全不是这样的。”

　　"Yes, but then you were tourists, now you are immigrants⁷.

　　“是的，但是那时你们是游客，现在你们是移民。”

1 decided   

adj.决定了的，坚决的；明显的，明确的

参考例句：

• This gave them a decided advantage over their opponents.这使他们比对手具有明显的优势。
• There is a decided difference between British and Chinese way of greeting.英国人和中国人打招呼的方式有很明显的区别。

2 hell   

n.地狱，阴间；用以咒骂或表示愤怒，不满

参考例句：

• It's a hell of a hike from Sydney to Perth.从悉尼到珀斯的徒步旅行简直苦死了。
• The boss really gave me hell today.老板今天着实数落了我一通。

3 eternity   

n.不朽，来世；永恒，无穷

参考例句：

• The dull play seemed to last an eternity.这场乏味的剧似乎演个没完没了。
• Finally,Ying Tai and Shan Bo could be together for all of eternity.英台和山伯终能双宿双飞，永世相随。

4 harp   

n.竖琴；天琴座

参考例句：

• She swept her fingers over the strings of the harp.她用手指划过竖琴的琴弦。
• He played an Irish melody on the harp.他用竖琴演奏了一首爱尔兰曲调。

5 shovel   

n.铁锨，铲子，一铲之量；v.铲，铲出

参考例句：

• He was working with a pick and shovel.他在用镐和铲干活。
• He seized a shovel and set to.他拿起一把铲就干上了。

6 entirely   

ad.全部地，完整地；完全地，彻底地

参考例句：

• The fire was entirely caused by their neglect of duty. 那场火灾完全是由于他们失职而引起的。
• His life was entirely given up to the educational work. 他的一生统统献给了教育工作。

7 immigrants   

n.移民( immigrant的名词复数 )

参考例句：

• Illegal immigrants were given the opportunity to regularize their position. 非法移民得到了使其身份合法化的机会。
• Immigrants from all over the world populate this city. 这个城市里生活着来自世界各地的移民。 来自《简明英汉词典》