Solving Today's Problems with Yesterday's Technology

Solving Today's Problems with Yesterday's Technology

 My wife told me that our daughter, now 10, would grow up to spend a lot of time on the phone. These days, when our home phone rings, the wife and I usually don't even bother to pick it up. Our girl will grab¹ it and start gabbing². The only thing is, she has claimed almost all the phones in our house. And so when the phone rings and she's not there, it's a chore to find the phone and stop the ringing. But, we came up with a solution.

Now my wife and I both have cell phones. Our friends and family know (or should know by now) that it makes little sense to try and reach us on our home phones. Actually, my wife is hard to reach on any phone. She hardly ever answers her cell phone. Grrr. That's for another post, I guess.

Still, we need to have home phones: To call 911, and to answer the phone when my daughter isn't there. Oh, it's usually for her, but you can't let it ring forever. "Just let the answering machine take care of it," you say? Sure, but it will usually be one of her friends, a girl, or worse, a boy (ready the shotgun?). Then, the friend leaves a message, "Call me!" and rings back in about five minutes.

Last year, I went out and bought three new home phones, on sale, all of them cordless. The two cordless phones we had just died from constant use. I put one of the new phones in the family room, one in the foyer, one in our bedroom.

The only old style phone we have, with a cord³ tethered to the wall, is in the kitchen. But that phone, like any with a cord, isn't really convenient, because if you answer it in the kitchen, it's hard to move around to cook, and you can't walk into the living room and sit down, or take a step outside for some fresh air (and peace and quiet).

That old style kitchen phone is a relic⁴. It used to hang in my wife's childhood kitchen, as far as I can remember. It has a crack in it from being dropped. The numbers are worn off, and we re-write them in every so often with a Sharpie marker.

Those old cord-style phones are a pain. And my daughter knows it. That's why she has usurped⁵ all of our cordless phones: Picking them up, using them, leaving them places, letting the batteries die, then picking up the next one she can find, and continuing the process. She even uses my wife's office phone, also cordless.

The other day, I saw a revelation⁶ on the grocery list. Below toilet paper and milk was "a phone with a cord." I knew immediately what my wife was thinking. I stopped over at Meijer, and was able to find one, solitary⁷ phone with a cord on the shelf (for $10). All of the other phones for sale were labeled as "convenient" and they were all cordless. Convenient, yes, if you use them and return them to the charger. I know, I know, I should make my daughter do this. She does, sometimes, rounding up all the died-out phones and putting them back into the charger. Then the scattering⁸ (and chattering) process begins all over.

Back to my new, old phone. I brought it home from Meijer, and plugged it in to the phone socket⁹ in our bedroom. Now, when the phone rings, there will be one on each floor that's sure to be there. Hah!

Now I haven't mentioned my other daughter in this post. She's not quite into the phone thing yet. We probably have a few more years. By that time, I hope to have the whole house rewired, if you get my drift¹⁰.

1 grab   

vt./n.攫取，抓取；vi.攫取，抓住(at)

参考例句：

• It is rude to grab a seat.抢占座位是不礼貌的。
• The thief made a grab at my bag but I pushed him away.贼想抢我的手提包，但被我推开了。

2 gabbing   

v.空谈，唠叨，瞎扯( gab的现在分词 )

参考例句：

• I can hear the ragheads when you're not gabbing. 你们不饶舌的时候，我听到有动静。 来自电影对白
• I can hear the ragheads moving, as soon as you girls stop gabbing. 你们女人不说话时，我能听到脚步声。 来自电影对白

3 cord   

n.绳，线；纺织品；小电线；腱

参考例句：

• I wear a safety cord all the time.我一直带着安全绳索。
• I pulled the cord,and I felt a strong jerk.拉住绳索，我强烈的恐惧。

4 relic   

n.神圣的遗物，遗迹，纪念物

参考例句：

• This stone axe is a relic of ancient times.这石斧是古代的遗物。
• He found himself thinking of the man as a relic from the past.他把这个男人看成是过去时代的人物。

5 usurped   

篡夺，霸占( usurp的过去式和过去分词 )； 盗用； 篡夺，篡权

参考例句：

• That magazine usurped copyrighted material. 那杂志盗用了版权为他人所有的素材。
• The expression'social engineering'has been usurped by the Utopianist without a shadow of light. “社会工程”这个词已被乌托邦主义者毫无理由地盗用了。

6 revelation   

n.泄露，揭示，展示，惊人的新发现

参考例句：

• Her true nature was a revelation to me.她的真实性格对我是一个新发现。
• The revelation of the plot of the traitors caused their capture.反叛者阴谋的泄露使他们被捕。

7 solitary   

adj.孤独的，独立的，荒凉的；n.隐士

参考例句：

• I am rather fond of a solitary stroll in the country.我颇喜欢在乡间独自徜徉。
• The castle rises in solitary splendour on the fringe of the desert.这座城堡巍然耸立在沙漠的边际，显得十分壮美。

8 scattering   

n.[物]散射；散乱，分散；在媒介质中的散播adj.散乱的；分散在不同范围的；广泛扩散的；（选票）数量分散的v.散射(scatter的ing形式)；散布；驱散

参考例句：

• The child felle into a rage and began scattering its toys about. 这孩子突发狂怒，把玩具扔得满地都是。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• The farmers are scattering seed. 农夫们在播种。 来自《简明英汉词典》

9 socket   

n.窝，穴，孔，插座，插口

参考例句：

• He put the electric plug into the socket.他把电插头插入插座。
• The battery charger plugs into any mains socket.这个电池充电器可以插入任何类型的电源插座。

10 drift   

vi.漂流(泊)；n.漂流，漂流物；大意；趋势

参考例句：

• The leaves drift in the storm.树叶在暴风雨中飘动。
• The drift of the icebergs in the sea endangers the ships.海上冰山的漂流危及船只的安全。