致单身的人:你真准备好要谈恋爱了吗？

 1. You're just in love with the concept of love.

你只是喜欢爱情本身的美好。

Cliché but this is most likely the situation if you think a relationship will save your life's monotony. People always have a romanticized notion of what having a boyfriend or girlfriend would make them feel like. You toy with the idea of having someone constantly with you, the dates and the candlelit dinners, but the exhilaration of having one only lasts in its early stages. If you expect too much from it you might jump into the first potential relationship you find and end up disappointed.

虽说陈词滥调，但也确实如此：如果你以为恋爱能救你摆脱无聊乏味，那必定只是喜欢“恋爱”字面的蕴意。人们对谈男女朋友总是充满过于浪漫的幻想，觉得身边会一直有人陪伴、能享受数不尽的约会和烛光晚餐。其实，这种情调只会短暂出现在恋爱初期。要是你怀着过高期望一头扎进去，最后只能失望收尾。

2. Do you even know yourself well enough already?

你已经足够了解自己了吗？

It's important to know yourself before becoming part of a relationship. If you don't stand for anything, you'll find yourself unconsciously giving too much and questioning if it was even enough.

谈恋爱前一定要对自己足够了解。如果你毫无立场，到时候会不自觉地无限付出，还一直困惑自己到底付出得够不够。

Set standards on the people you want to be in your life and how you want to be treated. Know what you're worth and eventually, you'll make him or her believe it too.

生活中要出现另一半时，先定下双方相处原则。你要清楚自己的价值，然后让对方相信你有这样的价值。

3. You just got out of one recently.

你刚刚结束一段恋情

When you've just broken up with your ex, finding a rebound¹ would seem like the most convenient solution. It's an easy distraction² from the past, all of a sudden your attention is claimed by someone else.

若你刚和前任分手，找个备胎貌似再简单不过了。你的注意力突然转移到了另一个人身上，自然更容易忘记过去。

However, this shortcut³ to recovery is also short-lived. If you're not genuinely ready, it will show. Give it time, enjoy being single and save someone else from the heart ache.

可是，这条捷径恢复得快，结束得也快。如果你还没有真正准备好，后面会给你颜色看。所以，慢慢来，先享受好单身生活，别再轻易伤害到另一个人。

4. You can't even make yourself happy.

你甚至都无法使自己快乐

Some people assume that having a boyfriend or girlfriend is the ticket to happiness. They think that it will make things lighter⁴ and easier because there's someone there to make them feel content. Though relationships may have this effect, you have to note that if your happiness is dependent on someone else and this person doesn't meet those expectations, you'll end up more miserable⁵ than you started.

有些人想当然以为，只要有男朋友或女朋友就会过得快乐。他们以为，到时候一切会变得容易而轻松，因为身边会有人安慰呵护他们。当然，恋爱确实能带来这些好处，但请别忘了：如果你把幸福托付给别人，一旦这个人达不到你的期望，你会超级受伤、悔不当初。

It's your job to make yourself feel happy and fulfilled, with or without a partner. A relationship simply adds value to you but it shouldn't be the one that completes you.

所以，不论有没有恋人，快乐和满足都只能靠你自己创造。恋爱只能为你增光添彩，却无法替代完整的你。

5. Will it fit in your priorities?

恋爱是你的当务之急吗？

If you're a person who has a vision and a plan, this is a good question to ask yourself. How will a romantic relationship fit in with your priorities? If you know that right now, you're still building your career and there's a lot at stake, is it the right time to have one? While you're finishing one project after another, having a boyfriend or girlfriend is a nice to have that you think about during your breaks.

如果你有自己的目标和规划，那很有必要扪心自问：一段浪漫的恋爱是否是当务之急？如果你确信如此，别忘了你正在努力打拼事业，百事待兴，这时候谈恋爱适合吗？你正项目接项目地忙活，喘息时想想身边能有个伴儿是件非常美好的事。

If you're fully⁶ aware that it's not one of your main concerns, there's a high probability that you'll take your partner for granted. It would be more beneficial and practical for you to allocate⁷ your time to what's important to you as of the moment and avoid disappointing someone else.

如果你非常清楚这不是你的重中之重，那就算有恋人，你很可能也不会特别投入。这种情况下，倒不如把时间用来做当下最重要的任务，不要徒劳使他人失望罢。

It's easy to be blinded by the media, past experiences and couples that you encounter about what a romantic relationship will bring you. But before you get consumed by your desire to have one or worse, be brought down by its current unattainability, be wise enough to think twice about it, what you want right now might not be what you need.

媒体宣传、以往经历或身边情侣很可能误导你对浪漫恋爱的理解。在你冲动想要恋爱前，不如清醒认识到目前的不切实际性，理智做到三思而后行——你现在所渴望的，未必就是你需要的。

1 rebound   

v.弹回；n.弹回，跳回

参考例句：

• The vibrations accompanying the rebound are the earth quake.伴随这种回弹的振动就是地震。
• Our evil example will rebound upon ourselves.我们的坏榜样会回到我们自己头上的。

2 distraction   

n.精神涣散，精神不集中，消遣，娱乐

参考例句：

• Total concentration is required with no distractions.要全神贯注，不能有丝毫分神。
• Their national distraction is going to the disco.他们的全民消遣就是去蹦迪。

3 shortcut   

n.近路，捷径

参考例句：

• He was always looking for a shortcut to fame and fortune.他总是在找成名发财的捷径。
• If you take the shortcut,it will be two li closer.走抄道去要近2里路。

4 lighter   

n.打火机，点火器；驳船；v.用驳船运送；light的比较级

参考例句：

• The portrait was touched up so as to make it lighter.这张画经过润色，色调明朗了一些。
• The lighter works off the car battery.引燃器利用汽车蓄电池打火。

5 miserable   

adj.悲惨的，痛苦的；可怜的，糟糕的

参考例句：

• It was miserable of you to make fun of him.你取笑他，这是可耻的。
• Her past life was miserable.她过去的生活很苦。

6 fully   

adv.完全地，全部地，彻底地；充分地

参考例句：

• The doctor asked me to breathe in,then to breathe out fully.医生让我先吸气，然后全部呼出。
• They soon became fully integrated into the local community.他们很快就完全融入了当地人的圈子。

7 allocate   

vt.分配，分派；把…拨给；把…划归

参考例句：

• You must allocate the money carefully.你们必须谨慎地分配钱。
• They will allocate fund for housing.他们将拨出经费建房。