感恩母亲节

　　每年五月的第二个星期天就是“母亲节”，你们想好送什么礼物给自己的母亲了吗？

　　Mother's Day is May 13 and we're already overwhelmed with commercials suggesting that we aren't good children or husbands if we don't break the bank honoring the woman who reared us this Mother's Day. If you've watched TV lately, you may think infants need to cough up diamond rings for their mommies, or that daughters should pick up a new smart phone for their moms.

　　今年的母亲节是五月十三日，而我们已经被各种商业噱头搞的心神不宁，似乎我们在母亲节没有出血犒劳这些含辛茹苦养大我们的女人就不是好儿女和好丈夫。倘若你最近也有看电视，你就会认为孩童都需要倾其所有以钻戒来回报妈妈们，或者女儿应该为妈妈们挑选一部智能手机。

　　It's true that moms like to receive special attention on Mother's Day, but not all moms are so materialistic¹. In fact, a pizza company did a survey recently that found that 96% of moms would be happy with a homemade gift from their kids (and one of their pizzas on the table).

　　妈妈们确实喜欢在母亲节获得特别的关注，然而并不是所有的妈妈们都是如此物质。事实上，一家披萨公司在最近的一项调查中发现96%的妈妈们会很高兴得到孩子们自制的礼物（和一盒他们公司的披萨。）

　　So if you have little ones at home, direct them to the craft aisle² when shopping for a Mother’s Day gift. If you're a grown kid, then try to plan a little in advance. Because the following list is a definite no-no.

　　所以，如果你家里有小孩，为母亲节选购礼物时就差他们去手工坊。如果你是大孩子，那就事先计划一下。因为下面的礼物清单是万万不可的。

　　Grocery store flowers. Come on, the woman who birthed you deserves more than a $5 bouquet³ of daisies. If you’re going to give flowers, think florist，give a pot of live flowers that she can enjoy all summer long.

　　杂货店的鲜花。好吧，给你生命的这个女人值得拥有一束超过5美元的雏菊。如果你要送花，那就考虑去花商那里，送一盆活的鲜花，这样她可以享受一整夏的花香。

　　Bag of chocolate. Yes, most moms delight in chocolate. But unless that bag of Walmart chocolate bars are tucked inside a handmade candy jar, you should aim a little higher. Think Godiva.

　　一包巧克力。是的，大多数的妈妈们喜欢巧克力。但是如果这袋沃尔玛的巧克力不是装在一个手工的糖罐里，你就应该再想个好一点的主义。可以考虑高迪瓦巧克力。

　　Cheap wine. Seriously? If your mom (or wife) likes wine, take her on a trip through Missouri wine country.

　　廉价葡萄酒。拜托，认真点。如果你妈妈或者妻子喜欢葡萄酒，那就带她去密苏里来一次葡萄酒旅行吧。

　　Discount jewelry⁴. Leave the “best mom ever” trinkets alone, unless you’re six years old and bought that $5 dollar bracelet⁵ with the hard earned contents of your very own piggy bank.

　　打折珠宝。这个蹩脚的主意还是省省吧，除非你是个6岁大的孩子并想要辛辛苦苦攒下你储物罐里的每个硬币去买那个价值5美元的项链。

　　Gift cards. Your mom cooks and cleans and even picks up your dirty socks. Now you’re going to make her shop for her own gift? Give mom a day off. If you give her a gift card, it is better be for her favorite restaurant or take-out joint⁶.

　　礼物卡。你妈妈每天为你洗衣做饭收拾脏袜子。现在你又要让她自己去选购礼物？给妈妈们放一天假吧。如果你给她一张礼物卡，不如让她有一天时间去自己喜欢的饭店或出游。

　　Small appliances. Just because your mom is still using the beat up toaster she got on her wedding day does not mean she needs a new one on Mother’s Day. Besides, giving your mom a toaster just says, “Mom, make me some toast.”

　　小型家电。如果你妈妈还在使用那个她结婚时收到的已经残破不堪的烤箱，这并不意味着她需要在母亲节这一天换一个新的。你送给她烤箱时应该对她说，妈妈，我想吃烤面包。

　　Exercise equipment. Even if your mom works out every day and looks like a Greek goddess, do not give her new workout gear. You may as well tell her she's fat to her face. She can buy her own workout gadgets⁷, thank you very much.

　　运动器材。即使你妈妈每天锻炼而且看起来像希腊女神，也不要再给她一个新的运动器械。你最好告诉她她的脸有些胖。她会自己去买运动器材并感谢你。

　　DIY facials. Sure there’s lots of pampering⁸ goodies to be found at make-up section of Target, but if you really want to surprise mom, send her to a spa.

　　DIY面部护理。化妆品区自然有很多令人眼花缭乱的东西，如果想要给妈妈一个惊喜，那就带她去做个SPA吧。

　　Coupons⁹ for chores. You and she both know these coupons will never be redeemed¹⁰. If you want to offer your time and labor¹¹, do it on Mother’s Day.

　　家务保洁优惠劵。你和她都知道这些优惠劵是绝不会被使用的。如果你想尽一点力，就在母亲节来做吧。

　　A day out with the family. If you plan on giving mom a “cherished memory” in the form of a trip to the zoo, a picnic in the park or a stroll through the museum…don’t. Not unless the trip includes a pre-packed picnic lunch and a promise of no whining¹² and no diaper changes (for those with little ones).

　　一家人一起外出。如果你计划带妈妈去动物园游玩，公园野餐或博物馆闲逛并想以此给她一个珍贵的记忆，还是不要吧。不仅仅是因为这趟外出需要提前准备野餐便当而且还要保证没有抱怨和没有为小孩子换尿布的麻烦。

　　Anything from the Dollar Store. Just turn around slowly and put down the 99 cent garden gnome¹³. You’ll thank us later.

　　一元店的任何东西。去一元店溜达一圈然后买下那个99美分的花园小矮人。你过后会感谢我们的。

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