[00:02.64]Rebellion ≠ Independence
[00:05.45]It's a pretty standard failing of the young
[00:09.32]to assume that disagreement is a demonstration of independence.
[00:12.98]But that can lead to a fallacious intellectual shortcut:
[00:16.89]I don't actually have to understand the situation
[00:19.77]in order to triumphantly prove
[00:21.67]that I'm independent of my parents;
[00:23.61]all I have to do is to disagree with them.
[00:26.53]In fact, real independence requires coming to
[00:30.25]understand a situation and then making your decision
[00:33.31]without reference to how your parents may have decided.
[00:36.11]Sometimes that means you find yourself agreeing with them.
[00:40.01]Every generation of young people feels a need to
[00:43.37]rattle the bars and to make changes,
[00:45.85]and to rebel against their parents.
[00:48.11]This is usually healthy, but it can become pathological.
[00:51.76]However, the most common and obvious manifestations
[00:56.21]are usually unimportant in the long run,
[00:58.57]in things like taste in clothing and music,
[01:01.15]and part of the appeal for the young
[01:03.56]is precisely the fact that their parents disapprove.
[01:06.24]So we had the flappers in the 1920s.
[01:09.31]In the 1930s young people were dealing with the Depression
[01:13.34]and didn't have the luxury of doing this kind of thing,
[01:16.26]and in the 1940s there was the war.
[01:18.87]But in the 1950s we had greasers,
[01:21.75]and in the 1960s there were hippies.
[01:24.12]In the 1970s hippiedom led to the freaks,
[01:27.91]and that kind of thing hasn't stopped happening.
[01:30.55]Modern kids are into strange hair styles,
[01:33.86]weird hair colors, tattoos and body piercing,
[01:36.77]and among the greatest appeal of all those things
[01:39.92]is the simple fact that their parents disapprove.
[01:42.98]The 1950s also saw the beatniks.
[01:45.84]Beatniks were non-conformists.
[01:48.32]They were independent; they were into cool
[01:50.93]and jazz and obscure poetry and modern art.
[01:54.05]And there was an amazing degree of uniformity
[01:57.06]amongst them in styles of clothing,
[01:59.20]and in ways of talking, and in attitudes and values;
[02:03.32]it was almost like there was some official
[02:06.24]“non-conformist” way of dressing
[02:08.09]and an official “non-conformist” set of attitudes
[02:11.22]and values to which these “non-conformists”
[02:13.84]all closely conformed.
[02:15.29]There was a lot of ridicule about
[02:17.59]their presumption of “nonconformity”.
[02:19.43]The beatniks were lampooned quite a lot by Mad Magazine,
[02:23.39]for instance. Because, of course,
[02:25.87]it was not the case that they were non-conformists.
[02:28.57]They just conformed to a different standard.
[02:31.01]That basic drive to rebel,
[02:34.01]and to prove rebellion by doing things parents condemn,
[02:37.15]is something most of us outgrow eventually.
[02:40.29]But that isn't really independence.
[02:42.87]If you can do those things,
[02:44.72]it proves that you are free—in the sense of
[02:47.61]not being externally constrained.
[02:49.54]It doesn't mean you are free inside your head.
[02:52.34]Real independence means making your own decisions
[02:55.80]about things without being unduly influenced by
[02:59.19]what others think you should decide.
[03:00.99]For example, a woman who chooses
[03:03.46]to be a wife-and-mother is liberated.
[03:05.75]A woman who is forced into that role is not.
[03:08.94]What's critical is who made the decision,
[03:11.86]not what decision was made.
[03:13.65]That's what most of us learn as we mature,
[03:16.74]as we outgrow youthful rebellion:
[03:18.97]I can agree with others and retain my independence,
[03:22.37]as long as I am the one making the decision.
[03:25.40]It isn't demeaning, or a sign of slavery,
[03:28.31]to feel respect for the achievements of others,
[03:31.57]as long as it is you who evaluates
[03:33.69]what they did and decides that it is worthy of respect.
[03:36.88]Being independent doesn't require you to
[03:39.68]automatically reject and condemn everything
[03:42.21]ever done by “dead white males”,
[03:44.45]or indeed to automatically reject anything whatever.
[03:48.06]In fact, you are just as much an intellectual slave
[03:52.47]if you automatically oppose everything
[03:54.30]that a certain “other” thinks and does as you are
[03:57.69]if you automatically support and agree.
[03:59.64]For when you automatically oppose them,
[04:02.35]you still let them control your position. |