Noah's Problems
[00:27.79]God spoke to Noah and said,"In six months I am going to make it rain
[00:35.66]until the whole world is covered with water
[00:40.20]and all the evil things are destroyed.
[00:44.64]But,I want to save a few good people
[00:49.61]and two of every living thing on the planet.
[00:53.97]I am ordering you to build an ark."
[00:58.12]And,in a flash of lightning,He delivered the specifications for the ark.
[01:04.78]"OK,"Noah said,trembling with fear and fumbling with the blueprints,
[01:12.33]"I'm your man."
[01:15.28]Six months passed,the sky began to cloud up,
[01:20.93]and the rain began to fall in torrents.
[01:25.50]Soon there was a major flood.
[01:29.94]The Lord looked down and saw Noah sitting in his yard,
[01:35.50]weeping,and there was no ark.
[01:39.66]"Noah!"shouted the Lord,"Where is my ark?"
[01:45.72]A lightning boit crashed into the ground right beside Noah.
[01:51.07]"Lord,please forgive me!"begged Noah.
[01:56.43]"I did my best,but there were some big problems.
[02:01.99]First,I had a big problem getting enough wood for the ark,
[02:07.87]because all the trees have been felled down.
[02:12.23]There aren't any forests any more.
[02:16.28]"Next,I started gathering up the animals,
[02:21.01]but I have trouble finding two of each kind.
[02:25.68]Many of them have become endangered species facing extinction."
[02:31.14]"And,I also..."
[02:34.10]With that,the sky cleared,the sun began to shine,
[02:40.05]and a rainbow arched across the sky.
[02:44.31]The water began to recede.
[02:47.86]Noah looked up and smiled.
[02:51.52]"You mean you are not going to destroy the world?"he adked hopefully.
[02:58.05]"No,"said the Lord."You already have."
[03:03.22]Horseback Riding
[03:32.27]Liz decides to try horseback riding,
[03:36.74]even though she has had no lessons or prior experience.
[03:42.38]She mounts the horse unassisted and the horse immediately springs into motion.
[03:49.33]It gallops at a steady and rhythmic pace,but Liz begins to slip from the saddle.
[03:57.17]In terror,she grabs the horse's mane,but cannot seem to get a firm grip.
[04:04.53]She tries to throw her arms around the horse's neck,
[04:09.50]but she slides down the side of the horse anyway.
[04:14.15]The horse gallops along,seemingly ignoring its slipping rider.
[04:20.91]Finally,giving up her frail grip,
[04:25.64]she leaps away from the horse to try to throw herself to safety.
[04:31.07]Unfortunately,her foot has become entangled in the stirrup
[04:36.82]and she is now at the mercy of the horse's pounding hooves
[04:41.97]as her head is struck against the ground again and again.
[04:47.22]As her head is battered against the ground,
[04:51.58]she is just moments away from unconsciousness.
[04:56.25]At this moment,the store manager runs out to switch off the horse.
[05:02.21]Job Hunting
[05:30.97]A local business was looking for office help.
[05:35.62]They put a sign in the window saying:
[05:40.09]"HELP WANTED.Must be able to type,
[05:45.65]must be good with a computer and must be bilingual.
[05:51.11]We are an Equal Opprtunity Employer."
[05:55.66]A short time afterwards,a dog trotted up to the window,
[06:01.30]saw the sign and went inside.
[06:05.74]He looked at the receptionist and wagged his tail,
[06:10.70]then walked over to the sign,looked at it and whined.
[06:16.37]Getting the idea,the receptionist got the office manager.
[06:22.22]The office manager looked at the dog and was surprised,to say the least.
[06:28.78]However,the dog looked determined,so he led him into the office.
[06:35.55]Inside,the dog jumped up on the chair and stared at the manager.
[06:41.61]The manager said,"I can't hire you.The sign says you have to be able to type."
[06:49.47]The dog jumped down,went to the typewriter
[06:54.43]and proceeded to type out a perfect letter.
[06:59.27]He took out the page and trotted over to the manager and gave it to him,
[07:05.30]then jumped back on the chair.
[07:09.24]The manager was stunned,but then told the dog,
[07:14.89]"The sign says you have to be good with a computer."
[07:20.16]The dog jumped down again and went to the computer.
[07:25.13]The dog went ahead to demonstrate his expertise with various programs
[07:32.21]and produced a sample spreadsheet and database
[07:37.25]and presented them to the manager.
[07:41.22]By this time the manager was totally dumbfounded!
[07:46.78]He looked at the dog and said,"I realize that you are a very intelligent dog
[07:54.64]and have some interesting abilities.
[07:58.69]However,I still can't give you the job."
[08:03.53]The dog jumped down and went to a copy of the sign
[08:08.96]and put his paw on the part about being a Equal Opportunity Employer.
[08:15.41]The manager said,"Yes,but the sign also says that you have to be bilingual."
[08:23.35]The dog looked at him straight in the face,and said,"Meow." |