[00:02.98]I don't know, it's kind of ridiculous and vaguely pathetic. 我不知道，那有点荒唐 还有点可悲
[00:15.30]Yeah, I see what you mean. That's pathetic. 是啊，我明白你的意思 那真可悲，太可悲了
[00:21.34]So, how'd you meet him? 你怎么认识他的？
[00:24.34]I was in La Perla just buying some weekend thongs. 我去买丁字裤的时候
[00:24.50]- And he was doing likewise? - No. 他也去买丁字裤？ 不是啦
[00:27.50]Actually, he said he was buying something for his mom. 是啦，他说他是去买东西送他妈
[00:30.66]His mom? 他妈？
[00:34.06]Casey, who buys high-priced lingerie for their mother? 谁会买高级内衣给自己老妈？
[00:36.14]Well, maybe he was looking for a robe. 也许他是想买睡袍
[00:37.70]Casey, he was hitting on you while he was buying lingerie for another woman. 雀喜，他在买内衣送其他女人时 看上了你
[00:44.18]- I prefer the mother story. - I know you do, but that's not the point. 我比较喜欢老妈这个藉口 我知道你喜欢，但那不是重点
[00:47.26]No, the point is I'm not gonna start out assuming the guy's a liar. 不，重点是我不想假设他是骗子
[00:51.74]- Why not? - Because that's how you wind up... 为什么？ 因为那下场就跟你...
[00:55.50]Like me? Is that what you were gonna say? 跟我一样？你是不是要说这个？
[00:58.14]No. I was gonna say, "Like you." 我是说跟“你”一样
[01:00.62]- What's his name? - Why? 他叫什么名字？ 干嘛问？
[01:04.10]- I'm gonna Google him. - No. Google your own guy. 我要上网查他 不要，查你自己的男人吧
[01:05.26]Let's just see if his mother's still alive. 我只想查查他妈是不是还活着
[01:07.66]- So when is Grace due again? - Soon. 你老婆预产期是何时？ 快了
[01:12.14]- You excited? - What'd you say? 你兴奋吗？ 你说什么？
[01:14.62]Do you want me to go get them and bring them over here? 要不要我去带她们过来？
[01:16.58]No, don't do that. 不，别那样
[01:18.62]Are you saying you don't wanna talk to them because you can't go home with them? 不能带回家就不玩了？
[01:23.18]I'm just trying to keep my head above water. 我只是想保持清醒
[01:23.54]- Have you heard of the Date Doctor? - Urban myth. 你听说过“约会顾问”吗？ 那只是都市传说
[01:25.86]- Really? - Absolutely. 真的？ 当然
[01:28.34]I was hoping he also helped women. 我还希望他也帮女人呢
[01:29.42]Casey, you're not sick. You're single. 雀喜，你没病，你只是没伴
[01:33.62]You just have to relax and enjoy the ride. 你要放轻松，享受单骑人生
[01:37.38]I haven't been ridden in months. 我好几个月没被人骑过了
[01:40.58]On that happy note, I'm gonna go see if anybody interesting came in tonight. 你有病，我们谈得真愉快 我去看有没有有趣的人来这里
[01:46.02]- You mean, besides me. - Right. 你是说除了我之外 对
[01:48.38]Bye. 拜
[01:49.78]I'll go get those girls, bring them over here... 我去带那些美眉过来…
[01:53.78]and we'll have a conversation like human beings. 一起礼貌的聊个天
[01:54.10]Then you're gonna home, and I'll take them back to my apartment. 然后你回家，我带她们回去
[02:00.46]Well, that sounds like fun for me. But you might want to get in line, pal. 听来不错，但你可能得排队了
[02:03.90]- Hey, girl. - Hey, how are you? 小姐！ 你好啊
[02:07.42]Hey, baby, can I get a couple Coronas at the pool table, please? Thanks. 小姐，送两瓶可乐娜去球台旁，抱歉
[02:12.78]Excuse me. 对不起
[02:16.94]Lime wedges in the bottle's fine. 柠檬塞进瓶子里就好
[02:18.82]Hey, asshole, I don't work here. 猪头，我不是服务生
[02:23.60]I'm sorry. The paramedics will have to come to get my foot out of my mouth, sweetheart. 对不起，这下我真是糗大了
[02:29.66]Just don't let it happen again. 别再弄错就好了
[02:33.42]- I knew you didn't work here. - You did? 我知道你不是服务生 你知道？
[02:35.06]How else was I supposed to get you away from all those guys? 不然要怎样才能把你弄出来？
[02:39.78]Why would you want to do that? 你为什么要这样做？
[02:41.86]Some guys naturally develop a comfort with the opposite sex. 有些人天生就很会安抚异性
[02:47.38]They like women, women like them. Everything flows naturally. 他们喜欢女人、女人也喜欢他们 一切浑然天成
[02:51.06]Back in college, I was just not one of them. 在大学时代，我可差多了
[02:59.10]I seemed to lack the basic understanding... 同学们早就忙着把妹时…
[03:02.26]that my peers just intuitively grasped. 我却啥都不懂
[03:03.94]But like any late bloomer, I was eager to make up for lost time. 而晚熟的我 急着想填补失去的岁月
[03:12.70]Her name was Cressida Baylor. 她叫克芮丝德
[03:16.98]Can you tell me where the registration building is? 麻烦你告诉我注册组在哪？
[03:22.54]And my life would never be the same. 我的人生从此彻底改变
[03:23.66]- I'm Alex. - Cressida. 我是阿圣 克芮丝德
[03:32.02]What we had was beautiful. 我们的爱很美
[03:37.74]I love you. 我爱你
[03:42.42]I love you so much. 我好爱你
[03:44.62]I love you, too, Alex. 我也爱你
[03:53.46]I know you don't love me as much as I love you. 我知道你不像我爱你那般爱我
[03:57.14]But that's okay. I'm just glad you love me at all. 但是没关系 我很高兴你爱我
[04:01.02]In retrospect, I guess I may have come on a little strong. 回想起来，我也许是爱过头了
[04:10.18]But the experience taught me a lot. 不过经验使我成长
[04:11.18]Cressida! 克芮丝德！
[04:16.90]What are you doing? 你在干嘛？
[04:18.10]I'm sorry, Alex. 对不起，阿圣
[04:21.10]But I love you. What did I do wrong? Just tell me what I did wrong. 我爱你，我做错什么了？告诉我
[04:24.50]You're doing it right now. 你现在就做错了
[04:27.78]Alex, I'm sorry. 阿圣，对不起
[04:33.62]And it's an education I feel obliged to pass on to my fellow men. 我觉得有义务要将这样的经验 传承给我的男性同胞
[04:42.06]Because with no guile and no game, there's no girl. 因为若是没有技巧或本领 就把不到妹
[04:46.22]世上若有天生没本领的男人…
[04:50.02]亚伯特布列曼就是了
[04:52.70]亚伯特布列曼 |