9 Queen Alice

　　‘Well， this is grand！’said Alice．She got up andwalked around for a while，but the crown feltvery heavy and strange，so she sat down again. Then she no-ticed that the Red Queen and the White Queen were now sit-ting on either side of her．How they had got there，she had noidea．But she was not at all surprised． Nothing could surpriseher now in the looking-glass world．

　　‘Now I am a Queen，’said Alice，‘does this mean that thegame of chess has finished，or-’

　　‘Speak when you're spoken to！’the Red Queen said．‘Think before you speak， and write it down afterwards．’

　　‘But I only-’Alice began·

　　‘And you can't be a Queen， ’the Red Queen went on，‘un-til you've done your lessons．’

　　‘Are you good at sums？’ the White Queen asked．‘What's one and one and one and one and one and one and one？’

　　‘I don't know，’said Alice．‘I lost count．But why-’

　　‘She can't do sums，’said the Red Queen．‘What about lan-guages？ And can you read？’

　　‘Of course I can read！’Alice said．‘And I know a littleFrench，but I really don't see why-’

　　‘It's clear，’said the White Queen，shaking her head sadly，‘that she wants to argue about something，but she doesn'tknow what to argue about！’

　　Alice decided it would be safer to say nothing， and for awhile there was silence． Then the Red Queen said to theWhite Queen，‘I invite you to Alice's party this afternoon．’

　　‘And I invite you，’the White Queen replied．‘But I musthave a rest first，’she went on．‘I am so sleepy．’

　　‘And so must I，’said the Red Queen．She looked at Alice．‘You can sing to us，to help us sleep．’

　　Then the two Queens put their heads against Alice's shoul-ders．In a moment they were both asleep，and snoring loudly．

　　After a while the snoring seemed to change and began tosound almost like music．Alice thought that she could evenhear some words. She listened hard， and suddenly she foundthat the Queens had disappeared， and she was standing infront of a tall and very grand-looking doorway．Above the doorwere the words QUEEN ALICE in large letters．

　　Alice knocked，and the door flew open．There seemed to behundreds of voices singing， and Alice could now hear thewords very clearly．They went like this：

　　Then fill up the glasses with everything nice，

　　And cover the table with buttons and rice．

　　Put cats in the coffee，and salt in the tea-

　　And welcome Queen Alice with thirty-times-three！

　　‘I suppose I should go in，’Alice said to herself．So in shewent，and at once everyone in the hall became silent．

　　As she walked down the long hall， she saw that there wereanimals， birds， and even a few flowers among the crowd seat-ed round the table. At the top there were three chairs； theRed and White Queens had taken two of them， but the middleone was empty． Alice sat down，feeling a little uncomfortableand wishing that someone would speak．

　　At last the Red Queen began．‘You've missed the fish．Bring the meat now！’And at once the waiters put a large jointof meat in front of Alice．

　　But before she could begin to cut up the joint， the RedQueen spoke again．‘Let me introduce you to the joint，’ shesaid．‘Alice-Meat．Meat-Alice．’

　　The joint of meat then stood up on the plate and curtsied toAlice．Alice，feeling both frightened and amused，picked upthe knife and fork．‘May I give you some meat？’she said，looking from one Queen to the other．

　　‘Certainly not！’the Red Queen said．‘It isn't polite to cutanyone you've been introduced to．Take away the joint！’

　　The waiters immediately carried away the joint，andbrought a large plum-pudding in its place．

　　‘Please don't introduce me to the pudding，’said Alicequickly，‘or we shall get no dinner at all．’

　　But the Red Queen said loudly，‘Pudding- Alice． Alice-Pudding．Take away the pudding！’And the waiters took itaway at once．

　　Then Alice decided to give an order herself．‘Waiter！Bringback the pudding！’When the pudding appeared again，shequickly cut off a piece and gave it to the Red Queen．

　　‘That's really friendly！’said the Pudding．‘How wouldyou like someone to cut a piece out of you？’

　　Alice was too surprised to speak．

　　‘Say something，’said the Red Queen．‘You can't leave allthe conversation to the pudding！’

　　By this time the party was beginning to get very noisy，andmore and more strange things were happening．Bottles andplates were now walking around on the table，arm in arm， andthe White Queen began to whisper in Alice's ear a long poemabout fishes．Then the Red Queen screamed at the top of hervoice，‘Let's drink to Queen Alice's health！’

　　Some of the animals put their glasses upside-down on theirheads，others got inside them or knocked them over on thetable．The forks began to dance with the spoons，and the noisegot wilder and wilder．The White Queen said in Alice's ear，‘You must stand up and give thanks now， you know．’

　　Alice stood up．‘I must stop all this！’she cried，and shetook hold of the table-cloth with both hands．One good pull，and everything came crashing down on the floor．

　　‘And now for you！’she went on， turning to the RedQueen，who had suddenly become very much smaller and wasrunning around on the table．‘You started all this trouble，and I'll shake you into a kitten！Yes，I will！’

　　9．爱丽丝王后

　　“啊，多壮观！”爱丽丝说。她站起来，来回走了一会儿，但王冠太重，戴着不自在，她重又坐下。然后，她发现红方王后与白方王后正坐在她两边。她不知道她们怎么会坐在这儿的。但她一点儿也不奇怪。现在镜中世界的一切对她来说都是不足为奇的。

　　爱丽丝说：“现在我是王后了，这是否意味着象棋游戏就到此为止了，或者--”

　　“有人跟你讲话，你才讲，讲话前要先思考，过后再记下来。”红方王后说。

　　“但我只是--”爱丽丝开口说。

　　红方王后又说：“直到你学好功课，你才能当王后。”

　　“你擅长算术吗？ 1加 1加 1加 1加1加1加1总共得多少？”白方王后问。

　　爱丽丝答：“我不知道。我算不清。但为什么--”

　　“她做不了算术，语言能力怎样？能读书吗？”红方王后问。

　　爱丽丝答道：“我当然会读书，我还懂点法语，可是我真的不明白为什么--”

　　“显然她想争辩点什么，但不清楚想争辩些什么！”白方王后遗憾地摇摇头说。

　　爱丽丝判定一言不发更保险。有一会儿，大家都不吭声。随后，红方王后对白方王后说：“我邀请你参加今天下午爱丽丝的聚会。”

　　白方王后答道：“我也邀请你去。但我得先休息一下。”她又补充了一句说：“我太困了。”

　　“我也同样。”红方王后说。她看着爱丽丝，“你可以给我们唱歌，帮助我们入睡。”

　　然后，两个王后把头都靠在爱丽丝的肩膀上。一会儿，她们就睡着了，鼾声如雷。

　　过了片刻，鼾声似乎变了声调，听起来几乎成了音乐。爱丽丝认为她甚至可以听出一些歌词。她用心地听，突然发现两个王后不见了，自己站到了雄伟壮观的一个门廊前。门上方写着，“爱丽丝王后”几个大字。

　　爱丽丝敲了敲，门突然打开了。里面似乎有成百的声音在歌唱，爱丽丝歌词听得很清楚。歌词是这样的：

　　让玻璃杯充满一切好东西，

　　让桌子摆满纽扣和米饭。

　　把猫放入咖啡，给茶加点盐--

　　热烈欢迎爱丽丝王后的到来。

　　爱丽丝对自己说：“我想我应该进去了。”她走了进去，顿时大厅里一片寂静。

　　她走过长长的大厅时，围坐在桌旁的人群中还有牲畜、飞鸟，甚至还有几种花。上座的地方摆着三张椅子，红白王后占了两个位置，中间一个空着。爱丽丝坐了下来，但感到有点拘束，希望有人发言。

　　红方王后终于开口了。“你没吃上鱼。现在上肉！”男侍即刻把一大块腿肉放在爱丽丝前面。

　　未等她切开腿肉，红方王后又讲了：“让我把你介绍给腿肉，”她说，“爱丽丝，这位是肉。肉，这位是爱丽丝。”

　　于是，腿肉在盘里站立起来，向爱丽丝行屈膝礼。爱丽丝拿起刀叉，心里感到既恐惧又好玩，目光从一个王后转到另一个王后，问：“我可以给你们分些肉吗？”

　　红方王后说：“当然不行！把刚刚介绍认识的人切了是不礼貌的，把腿肉拿走！”

　　男侍马上把腿肉拿走，换上了一个大干果布丁。

　　爱丽丝抢着说：“请别做介绍了，否则我们晚餐就什么也没有了。”

　　但红方王后还是大声说道：“布丁，这位是爱丽丝。爱丽丝，这位是布丁。把布丁拿走！”男侍又马上把它拿走了。

　　然后，爱丽丝决定自己来点个菜，“男侍！把布丁拿回来！”布丁一端上来，她就快速地切下一块递给红方王后。

　　布丁说：“你太友好了！有人从你身上切下一块，你感觉怎样？”

　　爱丽丝惊讶得说不出话来。

　　红方王后说：“讲几句吧。谈话中你不能让布丁唱独角戏。”

　　这时，聚会开始喧闹起来，怪事接连不断地出现。瓶子、盘子在桌上手挽着手行走，白方王后开始凑着爱丽丝的耳朵背一首有关鱼的长诗。然后，红方王后声嘶力竭地喊道：“咱们为爱丽丝王后健康干杯！”

　　有些牲畜把杯子倒放在头顶，还有些钻到杯子里面去，或者把它们打翻在桌上。叉开始同勺跳起舞来，喧闹声越来越响。白方王后冲着爱丽丝的耳朵说：“你现在必须站起来答谢各位了。”

　　爱丽丝站了起来。“我必须让这喧哗声停住！”她叫道，她双手抓住桌布，狠狠地一拉，桌上的东西统统砸到了地上。