英语听力：三怪客泛舟记.three.men.in.a.boat 10（在线收听）

　　Chapter10 Our first morning

　　I woke up at six o'clock the next morning，and I found that George was awake，too．We both tried to go to sleep again，but we could not．This was because we did not need to get up early．We could sleep for another two or three hours．But we both felt we would die if we tried to sleep for another five minutes．

　　George said that the same thing had happened to him a few months before．He told me a story about it…

　　At that time George had rooms in the house of a lady called Mrs Gippings．One evening his watch stopped at a quarter past eight．He did not realize this then．When he went to bed，he took off his watch，and he did not look at it．

　　This happened in the winter，so it was dark in the mornings，anyway．When George woke up，he looked at his watch．It was a quarter past eight．

　　'Good heavens！'George cried．'I have to be at the bank by nine o'clock！'And he threw down the watch and jumped out of bed．He had a cold bath and he dressed．Then he ran and looked at his watch．It had started to go again，and it was twenty to nine．

　　George took his watch and ran downstairs．The dining-room was dark and silent．There was no fire，no breakfast．George was very angry with Mrs G．He decided to tell her this later，in the evening．Then he caught hold of his coat，his hat and his umbrella，and ran to the front door．lt'was locked！George said that Mrs G．was a lazy old woman．Then he unlocked the door and ran out into the street．

　　For a few hundred metres he ran as fast as he could．But，suddenly，he noticed that there were not many people about．He also noticed that the shops were not open．It was a very dark and foggy morning．However，it seemed very strange that they had closed the shops because of the fog．He had to go to work，so why should other people stay in bed？

　　George could see only three people．One of them was a policeman，one was a man who was taking vegetables to the market，and one was a taxi-driver．

　　George looked at his watch．It was five to nine．For a moment，he stood there without moving．He wondered if he was dreaming．He felt his wrist，and bent down and felt his legs．Then，with his watch in his hand，he went up to the policeman．

　　'What time is it，please？'he asked the policeman．

　　'What's the time？'the policeman repeated．'Well，listen．'

　　Just then George heard a clock…one…two…three．'But that's only three times！'George said，when it had finished．

　　'Well，how many times do you want？'the policeman replied．

　　'Why，nine，of course，'George said，and he held out his watch to the policeman．

　　'Do you know where you live？'the policeman asked．

　　George thought for a minute，and then he told the policeman the address．

　　'Well，I think you should go back there quietly，'the policeman continued．'And take your watch with you！'

　　So George went back．

　　At first，he thought he would go to bed again．However，he did not like the idea of having to get up again later．So he decided to go to sleep in the armchair．

　　But he could not get to sleep．He tried to read，but that was no good either．Finally，he put on his coat again，and he went out for a walk．

　　He felt very lonely and miserable．He met policemen who looked at him strangely．They followed him about．He began to feel that he really had done something wrong．He started to hide in dark corners whenever he saw a policeman．

　　Of course，then the policemen wanted to know what he was doing．George said，'Nothing．I'm just going for a walk．'But they did not believe him．In the end，two policemen went back to the house with him．They wanted to know if he really did live there．They watched him go in with his key．Then they stood on the opposite side of the road，and they watched the house．

　　When he got in，he thought，'I'll light the fire，and then I'll make some breakfast．'But he made a lot of noise，and he was afraid that Mrs Gippings would wake up．She would hear the noise and think that he was a burglar．Then she would open the window and shout，'Help！Police！'the two policemen would come and arrest George，and take him away．So he stopped trying to prepare breakfast，and he put on his coat．Then he sat in the armchair and he waited for Mrs Gippings．She came down at half past seven．

　　George said that，since then，he had never got up too early again…

　　When George had finished his story，we decided to wake up Harris．It was hard work．In the end we had to use quite a sharp piece of metal．Harris sat up suddenly then．Montmoren-cy had been asleep on Harris's chest，and he went flying across the boat．

　　After that，we pulled up the cover and we put our heads over the side of the boat．We looked down at the water．The night before，we had decided to get up early．We would throw off the cover and we would jump into the water，with shouts of happi-ness．Then we would enjoy a long swim．

　　But now that morning had come， it did not seem to be a very good idea．The water looked wet and cold．The wind felt cold，too．

　　'Well，who's going to go in for a swim first？'Harris said fi-nally．

　　Nobody hurried to be the first one．George put his head back inside the boat．Montmorency barked with horror at the idea．Harris said it would he difficult to climb back into the boat a-gain from the water．Then he went back into the boat to look for his trousers．

　　I did not want to give up the idea absolutely．I decided to go down to the edge of the river，and then splash some water over myself．So I went out on to the river bank，and I began to move carefully along the branch of a tree which was over the water．

　　It was very cold，and I thought I would not splash water over myself，after all．I would go back into the boat and dress．I turned- and just then the stupid branch broke．The next minute，I was in the middle of the river，with half a litre of the Thames inside me．

　　'Good heavens！Old J．'s gone in！'Harris said．

　　'Is it all right？'George called out．

　　'Lovely，'I replied．'Why don't you come in？'

　　But they did not want to．

　　When I got back to the boat，I was very cold．I wanted to put on my shirt as quickly as possible．By accident，I dropped it into the water．This made me very angry，but George started to laugh．'I can't see anything to laugh at，'I told George．He just went on laughing！In fact，I never saw a man laugh so much．In the end，I became really angry with him．I told him what I thought about him．He laughed more loudly．And then，just as I was getting the shirt back out of the water，I noticed that it was not my shirt．So I began to laugh，too．I looked at George，who was laughing so much．Then I looked at the wet shirt- and I laughed more and more．Because I was laughing so much，I dropped the shirt in the water again．

　　'Aren't you going to get it out？'George cried，between his shouts of laughter．

　　At first I could not answer him，because I was laughing so much．In the end，I managed to say，'It isn't my shirt．It's yours！'

　　I have never seen a man's face change so quickly．I tried to make him see that it was very funny，but he did not agree with me．

　　After that，it was time for breakfast，and we decided to have eggs．Harris said he would cook them．He said he was very good at doing eggs．People who had eaten his eggs never want-ed any other food afterwards．'If they can't get my eggs， they won't eat，'he said，'and they die．'

　　So we gave him the pan，and all the eggs which had not bro-ken．'Go on，then，'we said．'Begin！'

　　Harris had some trouble when he tried to break the eggs．He had trouble stopping them from getting onto his trousers．And he had more trouble trying to stop them from going up his arms．Finally，he managed to get about six of the eggs into the pan．Then he sat down and started to cook them．

　　It seemed to be very difficult work．Whenever he went near the pan，he burnt himself．Then he dropped everything， and danced about，and waved his hands，and shouted．In fact， every time George and I looked at him，he was doing this．At first we thought it was necessary to do this to cook the eggs．

　　Once Montmorency went and looked into the pan，but he burnt himself．Then he started dancing and shouting，too．It was all very exciting，and George and I were quite sorry when it finished．

　　10 第一天早晨

　　我早晨六点钟醒来，发现乔治也醒了。我们俩都想再睡一会儿，可怎么也睡不着了。这是因为我们不需要早起了，而且还可以再睡上两、三个小时。然而，哪怕再多睡五分钟，我们都会觉得立刻就要死了。

　　乔治说几个月前，他也遇到了这种情况。他给我讲了这样的故事……

　　那时候，他在吉宾斯太太家租了几个房间。一天晚上，他的表走到八点一刻时停了，可他自己并没有意识到。睡觉的时候，他把表摘了，看也没看一眼。

　　这是冬天发生的事，因此早上天总是很黑。乔治爬起来一看表，正指着八点一刻。

　　“我的天哪！”乔治惊叫起来，“我九点钟要赶到银行呢！”说着扔了表，跳下床，匆匆用冷水洗了洗，穿上衣服，急急忙忙跑回去一看表，表又开始走了，现在是差二十分九点。

　　乔治抓起表，冲下楼。饭厅黑洞洞，静悄悄的，炉子没生，早餐也没做。乔治很生吉宾斯太太的气，晚上回来得好好和她理论理论。他拿着外衣，帽子和雨伞，跑到前门，门居然还锁着！乔治说吉宾斯太太真是个懒得要命的老太婆。他飞快地打开门，跑到街上。

　　他使出全力跑出去几百米，忽然注意到周围没几个人，店铺也没开门。那天早晨雾很大，天很黑，可是店铺要是因为雾大就停止营业，这可够奇怪的。他自己还得去上班，怎么别人就能在床上呆着呢？

　　乔治一共只见到三个人：一个是警察，一个是推着菜去市场的，还有一个是马车夫。

　　乔治又看看表，差五分钟九点。他站在那儿呆了一会儿，一动没动，好像还做着梦呢！他数数脉搏，又弯腰摸摸自己的腿。后来，他拿着表上前去问警察。

　　“请问，现在几点了？”他问警察。

　　“几点？”警察念叨了一句，“好吧，你听着吧！”

　　正在这时，钟敲响了。一下，两下，三下。钟不敲了，乔治问：“怎么才敲了三下？”

　　“对啦！那么你想要敲几下？”警察回了一句。

　　“九下，当然了，”乔治说，一边拿出表给警察看。

　　“你还记得你住在什么地方吗？”警察问。

　　乔治想了想，把自己的地址告诉他。

　　“那就好，我劝你还是悄悄回去，”警察接着又说，“别忘了你的表。”

　　就这样，乔治又回去了。

　　起初，他想接着睡，可他实在不想再爬起来，所以便决计在椅子上迷糊一会儿算了。

　　可是，怎么也睡不着。他想看看书，也看不进去，最后还是穿上衣服，出去溜达一会儿。

　　他感觉是那么孤独，那么悲伤。遇到的警察都以怀疑的眼光盯着他，还跟着他走。他开始觉得自己是不是真的干了什么坏事，所以一看见警察，他就找漆黑阴暗的地方躲。

　　当然了，人家警察也想知道他究竟想干什么。乔治说：“没什么，只是散散步。”但他们不相信乔治的话，后来两个警察和他一起回家，想看看他是不是真的住在那儿。他们看着乔治用钥匙开了门，便站在街对面，监视着这所屋子。

　　乔治进了门，想：“我得生个火，做点早饭。”可他的动静太大了，连他自己都担心会把吉宾斯太太吵醒，那她一定以为家里进了贼人，接着就会打开窗户大叫“警察！救命！”那样，两个警察肯定会来把乔治抓起来，带走。想到这，他也不做早饭了，穿上大衣，坐在椅子里等着，一直到七点半钟，吉宾斯太太下楼了。

　　乔治说，从那以后，他再也不敢早早起床了。

　　乔治讲完了故事，我们要去把哈里斯也喊醒。这工作可不好干。我们只得动用了一根尖尖的铁条，他蓦地一下子坐起来。“元帅”原来一直躺在他的胸口上，这会儿被扔到船那边去了。

　　随后我们卷起篷布，把头探出船舷，低头看着水。头天晚上，我们还打算早起，扯掉帐篷，跳进水里，齐声欢呼几嗓子，再痛痛快快畅游一番。

　　真正到了早上，这种兴致全没了。水看起来湿漉漉，冷冰冰的；风也是凉飕飕的。

　　“喂，哪位打算先跳下去啊？”哈里斯终于开口了。

　　没人急着当第一。乔治把脑袋又缩回船里；“元帅”想着这主意，吓得汪汪乱叫；哈里斯说怕是很难再从水里爬上船来了，说完他转身进了船去找裤子。

　　我可一点也不愿意放弃。于是下决心先到河边，把水往身上泼一泼。我上了河岸，小心翼翼地沿着一根伸到水面上的树枝走了几步。

　　真冷啊！我不准备往身上泼冷水了。我想回到船上穿衣服——就在这当间，那个该死的树枝折断了。再看我呢，已经在河中央了，肚子里灌了足足有半升泰晤士河水。

　　“老天爷！老杰掉进去了！”哈里斯说。

　　“没事吧？”乔治喊道。

　　“美得很！”我回答说，“你们怎么不下来玩玩？”

　　他们才不愿意下来呢。

　　我回到船上时，身上冷得要命，只想赶紧穿上衬衫。谁知，一不小心把它又掉进河里了。我气得要命，可乔治却大笑起来。我对乔治说：“这有什么好笑的？”他还是笑个不停，我从来没见过象他这样笑得发疯似的。后来我真的对他发火了，要和他理论，他却笑得越发起劲。那时候我刚把衬衫从河里捞上来，一看，发现原来不是我的衬衫，所以我也笑了起来。看看乔治，他还笑得那么厉害。再看看湿衬衫，我也越看越好笑，越笑越起劲。因为笑得太起劲，衬衫又掉到河里去了。

　　“你还不快把衬衫捞上来？！”乔治一边大笑着一边喊道。

　　我一时来不及回答他的话，只是笑个不停。后来好不容易才迸出几个字：“不是我的，是你的衬衫。”

　　我从来没有看见过哪个人面部表情转变得如此迅速。我还想让他觉得这事儿多么滑稽可笑，可他丝毫不能领略其中的妙趣。

　　到吃早餐的时间了，我们想吃煎鸡蛋，哈里斯说他来做。听他讲他特别会煎鸡蛋，吃了他煎的鸡蛋就会觉得吃什么也不香了。“没有我的煎鸡蛋，他们宁可不吃饭，”他说，“最后就饿得一命呜呼了。”

　　既然这样，我们把锅和还没有砸碎的鸡蛋给他找来，说道：“开始吧。”

　　哈里斯打鸡蛋的时候遇上了麻烦。他没法不让鸡蛋掉到裤子上，更没法不让蛋清淌到袖子里。好不容易把六个鸡蛋打在锅里，他坐下来，开始煎鸡蛋。

　　这个工作太复杂了。只要哈里斯一靠近锅子，准得烫着自己，把什么都扔了，甩着手跳来舞去，又喊又叫的。事实上，我和乔治每次看他，他总是那样表演着。起初我们还以为煎个鸡蛋，这样大呼小叫都是必不可少的一道工序呢。

　　“元帅”有一次刚要走近锅子看看，就给烫着了，它也跟着又喊又跳，场面十分热闹。后来表演结束的时候，我和乔治还感到意犹未尽。