I looked at Mike and said, “Those are for you, Ry.” 

　　That was all the encouragement he needed. He ran to the fire truck, climbed on, and rode three 3)laps around the living room on top of the truck. Then he 4)hopped off and lay down on his belly, pushing the tractor and making engine noises. 

　　Before long, Ryan had both Tonkas upside down, examining every inch. Ryan wanted to know every detail of every toy he had. If the Tonkas hadn’t been 5)welded, he would’ve surely taken them apart to have a better look. 

　　But there was something unusual about those Tonkas that Ryan didn’t notice. Tonka is famous for using standard colors on its toys, mostly school bus yellow. Ryan’s tractor was navy blue, and his fire truck was wine-colored with a silver ladder. These weren’t the Tonkas you buy in the store now. They were the good old hard metal ones no longer produced. For weeks, Mike had sat in his lonely little trailer in the evenings, cleaning, repairing, and sanding those trucks to make them good as new. Then he had painted them. Now he was getting the payoff for his labor of love. Ryan was in kid heaven. 

　　It had been a hard year for Mike, Ryan, and me. Only a few months earlier, Mike and I divorced. The breakup left both of us financially 6)drained. I felt 7)dismal after Thanksgiving, when I realized that Christmas was coming soon and I had no money. I could manage to get a small tree and maybe after that, if I really 8)squeezed, I could come up with five dollars to buy Ryan a few Hot Wheels. That was it. But compared to Mike, I was practically 9)rolling in the dough. Of course, he would spend Christmas Day with us and share our tree. But I knew that he would be hard-pressed to have even one 

　　extra dollar to buy Ryan anything at all. 

　　It was depressing at best. I wanted so much to make a wonderful Christmas for Ryan. Not that he needed the toys, and not that gifts are the heart of Christmas. Ryan would be surrounded by love and celebration and the recognition of the true meaning of Christmas with or without presents. But I’d waited a long time to have a child. And I was anxious to experience the joy that parents feel when they put things under the tree that they know will delight their children. 

　　One afternoon in early December I was on my way home when I heard a man on the radio say that he had a yard full of old Tonka trucks that he was selling for two to three dollars each. They needed some 10)TLC, but they were 11)sturdy and fixable. Ryan had played with Tonkas at a friend’s house and 12)adored them. It was the perfect gift for him, and I knew the perfect guy to do the fixing up. 

　　I was so excited, I didn’t even stop to call Mike and ask what he thought. He was still at work, anyway. I went straight to the address the man on the radio had given. I 13)scoured the yard looking for the best of the 14)bunch. Some of them had rubber parts that were broken, and I wasn’t sure how those could be fixed. Finally, I found two that were well worn but still had all their parts 15)intact. I paid the guy four dollars and fifty cents, almost my total 16)allotment for Christmas. He loaded the metal trucks into the 17)trunk of my car, and I drove to the auto body and paint shop where Mike worked. 

　　Just as he was getting ready to leave, I told him my idea: we could give Ryan a joint present. I bought the trucks, and he could fix them up like new. I was sure Mike had 18)sandpaper and tools, though I wasn’t sure about paint. When I opened the trunk and showed him the trucks, he caught my 19)enthusiasm – partly because he would have a great gift for Ryan, one that took Mike back to his own childhood and boyish delights, and partly because he would have a cool project to fill his lonely evenings. I expected him to be interested. But he was more than that. He was 20)thrilled. 

　　When Mike’s boss heard about the idea, he happily claimed, “Real metal…how about that! Tell you what, Mike, feel free to use any tools or sandpaper in the shop. You can even take some home this weekend. And when you’re ready to paint, you can use whatever we have leftover from 21)spray jobs. Ryan’s gonna love these.” 

　　He was right. Ryan loved them at age two and a half, and he loves them now, at eighteen. He still has those two Tonkas. When he was old enough to understand, I explained to him how his dad had spent hours upon hours turning old trucks into new ones, just for him. Ryan no longer plays with his trucks, and his dad is gone. But he can pick them up at any time, look them over, and run his hands over their smooth surfaces. Someday, he might pass them on to his own children. For now, they serve as solid-metal proof that he was the target of a whole lot of love. 

　　他蹒跚着转过角落，拐进起居室，突然停了下来。莱恩的小嘴大张着，眼中的光芒堪比圣诞树上的彩灯，闪亮夺目。他的面前有两个硕大的东卡玩具，发出崭新的光泽：一辆拖拉机和一辆带梯子的消防车。另外还有一些礼物，大都是他的祖父母送的，其中一两件小礼物是我送的。不过这些礼物都得先让位了。现在莱恩的眼里只有这些车子。

　我看了看迈克，说：“这些是给你的，莱。” 

　　莱恩就等着这句话。他飞奔上前爬上消防车，坐在车上绕着起居室开了三圈。然后他跳下车，趴在地上，一边推拖拉机，一边模仿着发动机的声音。 

　　没过多久，莱恩就把两辆车翻过来，开始仔细观察每一个部分。莱恩对自己每一个玩具的每一个地方都很好奇。如果这车不是焊接起来的，他肯定会拆开来好好看看。 

　　然而，莱恩没有注意到的是，这两个东卡玩具有些不寻常的地方。东卡的玩具总是使用标准的颜色，大都是校车那样的黄色。莱恩的拖拉机却是海军蓝色的，消防车是酒红色的，而梯子则是银色的。如今，这样的东卡玩具在商店已经买不到了。它们是以前那种质量很好、用硬金属做的玩具，现在已经停产了。好几个星期的晚上，迈克都是一个人坐在他的小拖车里，给这些车进行清洗、修理和打磨，把它们翻新，然后上漆。现在他为爱付出的劳动得到了回报，莱恩开心得就像在天堂似的。 

　　对迈克、莱恩和我来说，那是难熬的一年。几个月之前，我和迈克离婚了。分手耗尽了我们双方的财力。感恩节刚过，我想起圣诞节就要到了，自己却山穷水尽，心情抑郁难耐。我倒是可以想办法弄来一棵小圣诞树，如果再努力一下，也可以挤出五块钱给莱恩买几辆“风火轮”车，如此而已。不过比起迈克我还好些，毕竟我手头比他宽裕些。他当然愿意和我们一起在圣诞树下过节。但我知道他哪怕是拿出多余的一块钱给莱恩买东西都极其困难。 

　　反正就是沮丧无比。我很渴望能给莱恩一个美妙的圣诞节。他并不特别需要玩具，礼物也不一定就是圣诞节的主题。有或没有礼物，莱恩都会被爱包围，都会感受到欢庆的快乐和圣诞节的真义。只不过为了拥有自己的孩子，我曾等待了那么久。当父母在圣诞树下堆满礼物时，他们知道孩子会很开心。我迫不及待想体会这种身为人母的愉悦。 

　　那是十二月初的一个下午，在回家的路上，我在广播里听到有人说自己有满满一院子的旧东卡玩具卡车，每个只卖两至三美元。这些玩具虽然需要稍微修整，但还是挺坚固的，而且能修好。莱恩在一个朋友家玩过东卡，喜欢得不得了。这会是最适合他的礼物，而且我知道谁来修理最合适。 

　　我兴奋极了，根本没有停下车给迈克打电话问他觉得这主意如何。反正他还在上班呢。我就直接去了广播里那人给的地址，在他院子搜寻最完好的玩具。有些玩具的橡胶部件坏了，我不知道是否还能修。终于，我找到两个玩具，虽然很旧，但所有的部件完整无缺。我付给那人4.5美元，那几乎是我在圣诞节礼物上的所有预算。他帮忙把金属卡车装进我的汽车后备箱后，我开车直奔迈克工作的汽车修理喷漆厂。 

　　刚好迈克快要下班了，我便把这想法告诉他：我俩凑份子送莱恩一份礼物，我负责买，他负责翻新。我相信迈克有砂纸和工具，不过不确定他有没有油漆。当我打开后备箱把卡车给他看时，他也被我的热情感染了——既是因为他可以送给莱恩一件很棒的礼物，同时也给迈克带回童年回忆和孩提时的欢乐；也是因为这件有意义的事情可以充实他孤独的夜晚。我猜到他会蛮有兴趣，但他不只有兴趣，他简直激动得不得了！ 

　　迈克的老板听到这个主意，高兴地说：“金属做的啊……真棒！这样吧，迈克，厂里的工具和砂纸你随便用，这个周末你还可以带一些东西回家。准备上漆的时候，你可以用我们喷涂剩下的。莱恩肯定会喜欢这玩意。” 

　　他说得没错。莱恩两岁半的时候喜欢这些车子，现在他十八岁了，依然钟爱无比。这两个东卡玩具还在他那儿。他长大懂事以后，我告诉他，他的父亲花了很多时间把旧卡车翻新，就是为了他。莱恩不再玩卡车玩具，他的父亲也过世了。但莱恩可以随时拿起玩具、仔细端详，抚摸其光滑的表面。将来有一天，他也许会把这些玩具送给自己的孩子。现在，它们是实实在在的证明——我们曾给予他满满的爱。