-Leonard：How do I look?

　　我看起来如何?

　　-Sheldon：Could you be more specific?

　　你能说具体一点吗?

　　-Leonard：Can you tell I'm perspiring a little?

　　能看出来我在冒汗吗?

　　-Sheldon：No.

　　不能。

　　The dark crescent shaped patterns under your arms conceal it nicely.

　　你腋下深色的新月状图案将其隐藏的很好。

　　What time is your date?

　　你几点约会?

　　-Leonard：6:30

　　6点半。

　　-Sheldon：Perfect. That gives you two hours and 15 minutes for that dense molecular cloud of ，aromas to dissipate.

　　太好了，那你还有2小时15分，让那片稠密的人造纤维分子云消散。

　　-Leonard：Is it too much?

　　汗很多吗?

　　-Sheldon：Not if you're a rugby team.

　　如果你是橄榄球队员就不算多。

　　-Leonard：By the way, if it should ever come up, you didn't join us

　　如果以后提到今晚的事，你没来参加的原因是，

　　because you stuffed yourself with a chicken carbonara sub at Quiznos.

　　你在Quiznos吃鸡肉意面吃撑了。

　　-Sheldon：Why would I join you?

　　我为什么要去参加?

　　-Leonard：No reason.

　　不为什么。

　　Oh, you know what, maybe this isn't such a good idea.

　　你知道吗，也许这样做不好。

　　-Sheldon：Oh, no, well, now there's always the possibility that alcohol and poor judgment

　　不，酒精加上她一时糊涂，

　　on her part might lead to a nice romantic evening.

　　总有可能让今晚成为浪漫之夜。

　　-Leonard：You're right. Alcohol, poor judgment- - it could go well.

　　你说的对，酒、糊涂，今晚有可能会顺利的。

　　-Sheldon：Of course there is the other possibility,

　　当然还有另一种可能性，

　　that this date kicks off a rather unpleasant six months of the two of you passing awkwardly in the hall,

　　之后的6个月都会很难捱，俩人在走廊里尴尬的擦身而过，

　　until one of you breaks down and moves to another zip code.

　　直到其中一人崩溃并搬到别的州去。

　　-Leonard：You could've stopped at it could go well.

　　你说到"可能会顺利"就可以闭嘴了。

　　-Sheldon：If I could've, I would've.

　　如果我能的话我会的。

　　-Leonard：I mean, I'm a perfectly nice guy.

　　我是绝种好男人。

　　There's no reason we couldn't go to the restaurant, and have a lovely dinner,

　　没理由我们不能，在餐厅吃好顿晚餐，

　　maybe afterwards, talk about things we have in common.

　　饭后散散步，聊些共同话题。

　　You love pottery? I love pottery!

　　你喜欢陶艺? 我超爱陶艺的!

　　There's a pause, we both know what's happening.

　　然后暂停一下，我们都知道接下来要发生什么。

　　I lean in, we kiss.

　　我倾身向前，我俩接吻。

　　It's a little tentative at first, but then I realize she's kissing me back.

　　开始时还有点犹豫，然后她开始回吻我。

　　She's biting my lower lip! She wants me!

　　她在咬我的下唇! 她想要我!

　　This thing is going the distance! We're going to have sex!

　　这事能成!我们会做爱!

　　Oh, god, oh, my god!

　　天，上帝啊!

　　-Sheldon：Is the sex starting now?

　　现在开始做爱了?

　　-Leonard：I'm having a panic attack.

　　我恐慌症发作了。

　　-Sheldon：Oh, okay. Uh, well then... calm down.

　　好吧，冷静点。

　　-Leonard：If I could calm down, I won’t be having a panic attack that's why they call it a panic attack.

　　如果我能冷静就不会恐慌了! 不然这怎么叫做恐慌症发作!

　　-Sheldon：All right, all right. Uh, s- s- sit down.

　　好好，你坐下。

　　Yeah, sit down. Now close your eyes.

　　坐下，闭上眼。

　　-Leonard：Why?

　　为什么?

　　-Sheldon：Just do it.

　　照做吧!

　　-Leonard：Okay.

　　好。

　　-Sheldon：Now try to increase your alpha wave activity.

　　试着增加你α波的活性 (α波是脑电图中最著名的一种波在正常成年人闭眼放松时产生)

　　-Leonard：What?!

　　什么? !

　　-Sheldon：It's a biofeedback technique.

　　这是机能反馈疗法。

　　It's relaxation through brain wave manipulation.

　　通过控制脑电波来放松。

　　I read a paper about it in journal of American neuroscience.

　　我在美国神经科学月刊上看到一篇关于它的论文。

　　It was a little sparsely sourced, but I think the basic science is valid.

　　它的理论来源不完备，但是我认为基本原理正确。

　　I probably have it here somewhere.

　　我可能把它放在这了。

　　-Leonard：Who am I kidding? I can't go through with this.

　　我没法赴这个约会。

　　You need to call her and cancel.

　　你给她打电话取消吧。

　　-Sheldon：Me?

　　我?

　　-Leonard：Yes.

　　对

　　-Sheldon：What should I tell her?

　　我要跟她说什么?

　　-Leonard：I don't know.

　　我不知道。

　　Tell her I'm sick.

　　跟她说我病了。

　　-Sheldon：Ok

　　好。

　　-Leonard：Not the kind of illness that will make her want to come over and take care of me,

　　别说那种会让她想来照顾我的病，

　　but nothing so critical that she'll feel uncomfortable going out with me in the future.

　　也不要严重得让她以后不愿跟我约会的病，

　　if I want to try this again.

　　如果我以后还想尝试的话。

　　-Sheldon：Got it.

　　了解。

　　So I'm assuming nothing venereal?

　　那不能说花柳病啦?

　　I'll just tell her that you had a routine colonoscopy and haven't quite bounced back.

　　就跟她说你做了例行肠镜检查还没恢复吧。

　　-Leonard：Give me the phone.

　　给我电话。

　　-Sheldon：I thought you wanted to cancel.

　　你不是想取消约会吗?

　　-Leonard：I can't, because if I don't show up she'll still be expecting you.

　　不行，如果我不出现，她还是会认为你会去的。

　　-Sheldon：Why would she be expecting me?

　　为什么她认为我会去?

　　-Leonard：Stop asking me all these questions. I need to take another shower.

　　别问了，我要再去洗个澡。

　　-Penny: So are the rest of the guys meeting us here?

　　其他的人直接来这找我们?

　　-Leonard：Oh, yeah... no.

　　对...不对。

　　It turns out that Raj and Howard had to work and Sheldon...

　　Raj跟Howard要工作，Sheldon...

　　had a colonoscopy and he hasn't quite bounced back yet.

　　做了肠镜，还没恢复过来。

　　-Penny: Oh, my uncle just had a colonoscopy.

　　我叔叔也做了肠镜。

　　-Leonard：You're kidding. Then that's something we have in common.

　　这就是我们俩的共同之处了。

　　-Penny: How?

　　怎么说?

　　-Leonard：We both have people in our lives who...

　　我们都认识...

　　want to nip intestinal polyps in the bud.

　　想将肠道息肉扼杀于摇篮当中的人。

　　-Penny: so what's new in the world of physics?

　　物理界有啥新闻不?

　　-Leonard：Nothing.

　　没有。

　　-Penny: Really? Nothing?

　　真的? 一点都没有?

　　-Leonard：Well, with the exception of string theory, not much has happened since the 1930s.

　　除了弦理论，自1930年后就没什么发现了。

　　And you can't prove string theory.

　　而弦理论也尚未证明。

　　At best you can say,

　　最多就能说，

　　"Hey, look, my idea has an internal logical consistency.”

　　嘿，我的理论内部逻辑很连贯。

　　-Penny: Ah. Well, I'm sure things will pick up.

　　啊，我相信情况会好转的。

　　-Leonard：What's new at the cheesecake factory?

　　芝士蛋糕工厂那边有什么新消息?

　　-Penny: Oh, uh, not much.

　　没有什么。

　　We do have a chocolate key lime that's moving pretty well.

　　有个巧克力柠檬派卖得很好。

　　-Leonard：Good. Good.

　　很好。

　　What about your, uh... hallway friend?

　　那你那个...过道上的朋友怎样?

　　-Penny: Doug? Oh, yeah, I don't know.

　　Doug? 我不知道。

　　I mean, you know, he's nice and funny, but...

　　他人挺好也很风趣，但是...

　　-Waitress: can I get you started with some drinks?

　　准备开始点饮品了吗?

　　-Leonard: No, easy. You were saying? But...

　　不!你刚刚说到? 但是...

　　-Penny: I'd like a drink.

　　我想喝点东西

　　-Leonard: Just say the "but" thing about Doug and then I'll get her back.

　　先说完关于Doug的"但是" 我会把她叫回来。

　　-Penny: Okay, well, I don't know, it's just me.

　　我不知道，是我的问题。

　　I'm still getting over this breakup with Kurt and this thing with Doug would start be rebound sex.

　　我还没从跟Kurt的分手中完全恢复，跟Doug在一起是为了复健性爱。

　　-Leonard: Oh, don't get me started on rebound sex…

　　噢，提起复健性爱啊...

　　-Penny: It's just... it's my pattern.

　　我总是这样。

　　I break up, then I find some cute guy, and then it's just 36 meaningless hours of... you know.

　　分手后找个帅哥，然后就是36小时毫无意义的... 你知道。

　　-Leonard: I'm not sure that I do is that one 36-hour experience,

　　我不确定我知道连续36个小时，

　　or is that 36 hours spread out over, say... one glorious summer?

　　还是一个辉煌夏季中...分散的36个小时?

　　-Penny: No, it's usually over a weekend, and trust me, you do not feel good after it.

　　不，大概是一个周末吧。相信我，那之后感觉很不好。

　　-Leonard: Well, chafing, right?

　　呃，皮肤疼痛是吧?

　　-Penny: Emotionally.

　　心情不好。

　　-Leonard: Of course, yeah, emotional chafing.

　　没错，心里疼痛。

　　Hey, do you want to see something cool?

　　你想看些有趣的玩意吗?

　　I can make this olive go into this glass without touching it.

　　我不用手碰就能把这颗橄榄弄进杯子里。

　　-Penny: How?

　　怎么弄啊?

　　-Leonard: Physics.

　　物理原理。

　　-Penny: Wow, centrifugal force.

　　哇，离心力。

　　-Leonard: Actually, it's centripetal force, which is an inward force generated by the glass acting on the olive...

　　实际上是向心力,玻璃对橄榄作用产生的内向力。

　　Excuse me.

　　抱歉。

　　If you were riding on the olive, you'd be in a non inertial reference frame and would...

　　如果你坐在那颗橄榄上，你就是一个非惯性参照系，并会...

　　-Penny: are you okay?

　　你没事吧?

　　-Leonard: Yeah, I'm okay.

　　没事。

　　Did you spill ketchup?

　　你打翻花生酱了吗?

　　-Penny: No.

　　没。

　　-Leonard: I'm not okay.

　　那有事了。

　　-Penny: Are you sure you don't want to go to the emergency room?

　　你确定不用去急诊室?

　　-Leonard: No, no, I'm okay. It stopped bleeding.

　　我没事，不流血了。

　　-Penny: I know, but you did throw up. Isn't that a sign of a concussion?

　　但你吐了啊，那不是脑震荡的症状吗?

　　-Leonard: Yes. But I get car sick, too, so...

　　对，但我也晕车，所以...

　　-Penny: okay.

　　好吧。

　　-Leonard: Sorry about your car, by the way.

　　还有，抱歉弄脏你的车。

　　-Penny: Oh, no, it's fine. You got most of it out the window.

　　没关系，大部分你都吐车外了。

　　-Leonard: The poor guy on the bike.

　　那个骑自行车的可怜人。

　　Well, I had a nice time.

　　我今晚过得很愉快。

　　-Penny: Yeah, me, too.

　　我也是。

　　Well, um, good night.

　　那晚安啦。

　　-Leonard: Good night.

　　晚安

　　-Penny: Leonard? Ah? Was this supposed to be a date?

　　Leonard? 今晚这是约会吗?

　　-Leonard: This? No. No, of course not.

　　今晚? 不是，当然不是。

　　This was just you and me hanging out with a bunch of guys

　　只是你跟我还有一帮

　　who didn't show up 'cause of work and a colonoscopy.

　　因工作和肠镜而没有出现的人的聚会。

　　-Penny: Okay, I was just checking.

　　好，我只是问问。

　　-Leonard: When I take a girl on a date- - and I do- -

　　如果我跟女孩约会，我确实跟女孩约会，

　　she knows she's been dated.

　　那个女孩会知道她是在约会的。

　　Capital D.

　　大写D，

　　Boldface. Underlined. Da... ted.

　　粗体黑字，下划线 (在强调会让对方意识到是约会= =)约会。

　　I think I might have a little concussion. I'm going to go lie down.

　　我可能脑震荡了，我去躺躺。

　　Good night.

　　晚安。

　　-Sheldon：So, how was your date?

　　约会如何?

　　-Leonard：Awesome!

　　赞!

　　-Sheldon：Score one for liquor and poor judgment.

　　凭酒跟糊涂得一分。

　　perspiring：出汗，流汗

　　crescent：新月，月牙

　　stuffed with：塞满

　　carbonara：（意大利）烤面条

　　kicks off：使…开始

　　tentative：试探性的

　　panic attack：恐慌发作

　　biofeedback technique：生物反馈技术

　　sparsely：缺少的

　　colonoscopy：结肠镜检查

　　consistency：一致性，连贯性

　　pick up：振作起来（也有捡起、拾起、慢慢学会的意思）

　　chafe: n. 擦伤,气恼;v. 摩擦,擦痛,激怒

　　centrifugal：离心力

　　centripetal：向心力

　　inward force：内向力

　　boldface：粗体黑字