Why do I always have to carry the heavy stuff?

　　很简单啊

　　Well,it's very simple.

　　在我们这群一无所有的破烂科学家当中

　　In our ragtag band of scientists with nothing to lose,

　　我负责动脑子

　　I'm the smart one,

　　沃罗威茨负责搞笑

　　Wolowitz is the funny one,

　　库萨帕里是一个奋力想要融入我们的生活

　　and Koothrappali is the lovable foreigner

　　但是以失败告终的可爱的老外

　　who struggles to understand our ways and fails.

　　你别无选择  只有肌肉男了

　　That leaves you,by default,as the muscle.

　　再多搬一层  我就肌肉难了

　　One more floor,and I'd be the pulled muscle.

　　来的正好

　　Oh,it's about time.

　　我要饿死了

　　I'm starving.

　　这个  其实我们没带中国菜回来

　　Um,well,we didn't actually get Chinese food.

　　-为什么啊  -淡定

　　- Why not?  - Don't panic.

　　这个更赞

　　This is better.

　　不是吧

　　Oh,no.

　　你们不会用食物换了魔豆吧

　　You didn't trade the food for magic beans,did you?

　　当然没有

　　Of course not.

　　况且严格来说  魔豆也是食物

　　And technically,magic beans would be food.

　　虽然吃了它们怪浪费的

　　Although eating them would be quite a waste,

　　因为你可以种植它们

　　since you could plant them,

　　然后一夜之间  就会长成一株巨大的豆茎

　　and overnight,have a giant beanstalk,

　　足够一个小城市吃的

　　which would provide enough roughage for a small city.

　　其实有时候我根本没听你说话

　　Yeah,sometimes I don't listen.

　　只是看着你的下巴一上一下

　　Sometimes I just watch your jaw go up and down.

　　我们去中餐馆的路上

　　We were on our way to the Chinese restaurant

　　貌似看见了亚当?韦斯特

　　when we thought we saw Adam West,

　　亚当?韦斯特:《蝙蝠侠》的扮演者

　　所以我们就跟着他走

　　so we followed him.

　　谁是亚当?韦斯特

　　Who's Adam West?

　　谁是亚当?韦斯特

　　Who's Adam West?!

　　莱纳德  你们性交之后都聊些什么啊

　　Leonard,what do the two of you talk about after the coitus?

　　我猜是  "哇塞  4分钟"

　　My guess is,"Hey,four minutes!

　　"新纪录啊"

　　New record!"

　　所以我才负责搞笑啊

　　That's why I'm the funny one.

　　反正呢  我们跟着他到了旧货出售摊儿

　　Anyway,we followed the guy to this garage sale,

　　那卖的东西都超赞

　　and they had the coolest stuff.

　　他们正好关门大甩卖

　　They were closing up.

　　这一箱子东西才60块

　　We got this whole box for 60 bucks.

　　我们还没来得及看清都有什么呢

　　We didn't even get to go through it all.

　　说不定有什么宝贝呢

　　There could be anything in here.

　　看看有没有新女朋友

　　There a new girlfriend in there?

　　说不定你需要一个

　　'Cause you might need one.

　　没有

　　No.

　　不过有《捉鬼敢死队》的原版终稿

　　But there is an original final draft Ghostbusters script

　　上面真的有黏液的污迹哎

　　with actual slime stains!

　　你说得对

　　Oh,you're right.

　　这个是《捉鬼敢死队2》

　　It's Ghostbusters 2.

　　没看头

　　Never mind.

　　我滴神啊

　　Oh,my God.

　　是阿福娃娃

　　An Alf doll.

　　我11岁的时候  我妈在我爸去世之后

　　When I was 11,my mother got me one

　　给我买了一个

　　to help me sleep

　　好让我能睡好觉

　　after my dad left.

　　我那时候会假装

　　I used to pretend

　　爸爸是去了蜜胺树脂星球

　　that my dad had moved to the planet Melmac,

　　而阿福会把他带回我身边的

　　and Alf was going to bring him back to me.

　　但它从来也没有

　　But he never did.

　　我爸爸在哪儿  小玩偶

　　Where's my daddy,puppet?

　　他在哪儿

　　Where is he?

　　太伤感了

　　That is so sad.

　　不  更伤感的是你居然不知道

　　No,what's sad is that you don't know

　　亚当?韦斯特是电视版蝙蝠侠的扮演者

　　Adam West was TV's Batman.

　　史波克的脑袋

　　Here's Spock's head with no body.

　　波克:《星际迷航》中的人物

　　T先生的身子

　　Here's Mr.T's body with no head.

　　Mr.T:《星际迷航》中的人物

　　啊在这儿  史波克的身子配T先生的脑袋

　　Oh,yeah,here's Spock's body with Mr.T's head.

　　我同情那些没有逻辑的傻瓜

　　I pity the fool who's illogical.

　　好吧  我要回家了

　　Okay,I'm just gonna go home

　　做一个烤干酪  然后上eHarmony

　　and make a grilled cheese and window-shop

　　eHarmony:美国线上交友网站

　　意淫去

　　on eHarmony.

　　好的  拜拜

　　Okay,bye.

　　妥了

　　Okay.

　　哇塞  快看  《夺宝奇兵》的连连看

　　Ooh,look,an Indiana Jones connect-the-dots.

　　还有潜水侠的手办

　　And an Aquaman action figure.

　　好像有人给他画了个小弟弟

　　Looks like someone drew a penis on him.

　　没事儿  看我擦掉

　　Ooh,that'll come off.

　　我们都看不下去了喂

　　You see what you're doing?

　　停下

　　Stop that.

　　真赞啊

　　Fascinating.

　　什么东西

　　What?

　　是《魔戒》里的魔戒

　　It appears to be a Lord of the Rings ring.

　　上面居然还刻着

　　Oh. It's even got

　　精灵语呢

　　the Elvish engraving on it.

　　不是精灵语

　　It's not Elvish.

　　是用精灵语的字母写的魔多语

　　It's the language of Mordor written in Elvish script.

　　"魔戒全属至尊御"

　　"One Ring to rule them all."

　　出自《魔戒》台词

　　"至尊指引诸魔戒"

　　"One Ring to find them."

　　"至尊魔戒唤众戒"

　　"One Ring to bring them all."

　　"众戒归一黑暗中"

　　"And in the darkness bind them."

　　我靠  咱们好宅啊

　　Holy crap,are we nerdy.

　　我调查了一下这个魔戒

　　So,I was doing some checking on the ring.

　　等下  谢尔顿  那边桌子上的是番茄酱吗

　　Hold on. Sheldon,is there ketchup on that table?

　　是滴

　　Yes,there is.

　　有个好玩的事儿

　　Oh,here's a fun fact.

　　最初的时候  番茄酱

　　Ketchup started out

　　是酱汁的总称

　　as a general term for sauce,

　　特别是那些加了草本植物和香料的

　　typically made of mushrooms or fish brine

　　蘑菇或腌鱼

　　with herbs and spices.

　　早期流行的主材料包括蓝莓

　　Some popular early main ingredients included blueberry,

　　凤尾鱼  牡蛎  四季豆  还有葡萄

　　anchovy,oyster,kidney bean and grape.

　　没事儿  我去拿

　　No,that's okay. I'll get it.

　　听我说  我仔细观察了魔戒

　　Listen,I was looking at the ring,and it

　　看上去有点奇怪

　　seemed a little weird.

　　上面竟然没有版权声明

　　No copyright notice on it.

　　所以我就拿给我一个哥们儿看  这么说吧

　　So,I took it down to this buddy of mine who deals with--

　　他专门和收藏界的黑市

　　shall we say-- the seedy underbelly

　　做交易

　　of the collectibles world.

　　黑市

　　Seedy underbelly?

　　你那个黑市淘来的手提式相位枪

　　You know,your black market phasers,

　　出自《星际迷航》

　　还有乌拉中尉在电影中穿过的内裤

　　your screen-worn Lieutenant Uhura panties,

　　就那些东西呗

　　that kind of stuff.

　　你这个神秘兄弟是谁

　　Who's this mysterious buddy you suddenly have?

　　就是我认识的一个家伙

　　Just a guy. I know a guy.

　　-艾迪?克里斯波吗  -我不能告诉你  别问了

　　- Is it Eddie Crispo? - No,I can't tell you who it is. Stop asking.

　　还能是谁  肯定是艾迪?克里斯波

　　Who else could it be? It has to be Eddie Crispo.

　　我认识很多黑道人物  好不好

　　I know lots of dangerous people,okay?

　　-说一个  -艾迪?克里斯波

　　- Name one. - Eddie Crispo.

　　不管怎样

　　Anyway,

　　他说这个不是仿品

　　he said this isn't a replica.

　　而是真品

　　It's the real deal.

　　如果你说这就是索伦在末日火山

　　If you're suggesting that that is the actual ring of power

　　打造的至尊魔戒[指环王情节]

　　forged by Sauron in Mount Doom,

　　我会用极为不屑和

　　I look at you with an expression of exhaustion

　　嘲笑的表情看着你

　　and ever so slight amusement.

　　他不是说这是魔戒

　　He's not saying it's a magic ring.

　　对吧

　　You're not,are you?

　　没错  但差不多

　　No,but it's close.

　　看里面的标记

　　Look at the markings inside.

　　那是生产标记

　　Those are production markings.

　　为拍摄《指环王》  共打造了九枚戒指

　　Nine rings were made for use in the Lord of the Rings movies.

　　三枚送给了剧中演员

　　Three were given to members of the cast.

　　剩下的都被销毁了

　　The rest were destroyed.

　　除了一枚Except one.

　　被偷的一枚

　　One was stolen.

　　先生们

　　Gentlemen...