搞笑英文短信(在线收听

Not every flower symbolize for love, but rose can do it; not every tree can stand thirst, but alamo can do it, not every pig can read short message, but you can do it. Congratulations!   不是每一朵花都能代表爱情,但是玫瑰做到了;不是每一种树都能耐住干渴,但是白杨做到了;不是每一头猪都能看短消息,但是你做到了。恭喜你! This msg. will refresh your brain in 5 seconds. 5...4...3...2...1... >Error: No Brain Detected!!! 这条消息将会让你的头脑清醒5秒。5…4…3…2…1… >错误提示:未侦测到大脑!!! Hello I am a virus and I am entering your brain right now...Sorry I will leave, I can't find a brain. 你好,我是病毒!并且现在正逐渐进入你的大脑……对不起,我要走了,因为我根本找不到你的大脑! Good morning...Have u done two of the most important things when you wake up today? 1) Pray-so that u may live...2)Take a bath-so that others may live too! 早上好……你今早醒来的时候有没有做这两件最重要的事呢? 1)祈祷- 好让你可以活下去……2)洗澡-好让别人也可以活下去! Good looks catch the eyes but Good Personality catches the heart. You are blessed with both! FLATTERED? Don't Be! It was sent to me. I just wanted you to read it. 漂亮的脸蛋能吸引眼球但是好的人品能吸引人心。你很幸运的同时拥有这两方面!被恭维了? 少来了!这个短消息是送给我的。我只不过想让你看看罢了。 Don't be mad, don't be blue, Einstein was ugly too! 不要激动,不要忧郁,爱因斯坦长相也难看! 1 day u'll B surprised 2C ME beside U. U & Me laughing, U&Me crying, U & Me dreaming, U & Me holding on, U & Me...just U & Me sitting in a MENTAL & ME CHECKING U. 一天你会很惊讶的发现我出现在你身边。你我一起欢笑,一起哭泣,一起梦想,依偎在一起,一起……只不过是你我一起坐在精神病院里并且我(医生)给你(精神病人)做检查。 You may fall from mountain, you may fall from tree, but the best way to fall, is fall to my love. 你可能会从山上掉下来,也可能会从树上掉下来,但是,最好的方式,是你会爱上我。 Once god came up 2 me & granted me a wish. I asked 4 world peace. That's impossible, he said. 有一次上帝来到我面前答应了我一个愿望。我说我要世界和平。“那是不可能的”他说。 Then I asked him 2 give u brains. He said, "Let me try world peace". 然后我请让你变聪明。他说:“你还是让我试试让世界和平吧。” Every morning I pray 2 God that everybody should get a friend like u,... 每天早晨我都向上帝祷告:希望每个人都能够拥有像你这样的朋友…… Why should I be the only to suffer...?? 为什么只有我要忍受有你这样的朋友? If u hide, I'll seek 4 u. If u r lost, I'll search 4 you. If u'll leave, I'll wait 4 u. If days take u away 4m me, I'll fight 4 u. 如果你躲起来,我会去找你。如果你不见了,我会寻觅你。如果你离开了,我会等你。如果日子会把你带走,我会为你战斗。 But, if u stop sending msgs, I'll kill you. 但是,如果你停止发短信息,我会宰了你。 A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T V W X Y Z oops! i miss "U" A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T V W X Y Z 哎呀!我居然丢了“U” 注:U代表 “You”你。miss除有“遗漏”的意思,还有“思念”之意。这里i miss "U",实为"I miss you." 我想你。 If you are alone, I'll be your shadow. If you want to cry, I'll be your shoulder. If you want a hug, I'll be your pillow. If you need to be happy, I'll be your smile. If you need money... wait for your salary. 如果你感到孤独,我做你的影子。如果你想哭泣,我做你的肩膀。如果你想要拥抱,我做你的枕头。如果你想要快乐,我做你的微笑。如果你想要钱……等着发工资吧! Can u pronounce good English? Read along: woof, roof, loof, shoof, shoof, woof, loof, poof, woof, woof, hoof, loof, roof, shoof, Test results: U r a good dog. Now stop barking. 你的英语发音很标准?读下去:woof, roof, loof, shoof, shoof, woof, loof, poof, woof, woof, hoof, loof, roof, shoof, 测试结果:你是一条好狗。现在可以停下别叫了。
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