好吧

　　I've divided your bills into three categories...

　　我把你的账单分成了三类

　　"impossible"

　　"偿还无能"

　　"next to impossible"

　　"偿还困难"

　　and "how the hell did that happen?"

　　以及"脑子进水了才欠的债"

　　And I've divided my roommate into three categories...

　　我把我的室友也分成三类

　　"annoying"

　　"讨人厌"

　　"super annoying"

　　"超级讨人厌"

　　and "how the hell did that happen?"

　　以及"脑子进水了才让她搬进来的"

　　打工姐妹花第一季

　　I'm closing kitchen in ten minutes.

　　我十分钟后就要关厨房了

　　I cannot stay later.

　　我不能留太晚

　　I have date with new woman in my life.

　　我跟我的新桃花有约

　　She's very special to me.

　　她在我心目中很重要

　　I think she may be the one.

　　我觉得她是我的真命天女

　　You are both welcome to come watch us have sex.

　　欢迎来观看我俩激情床战

　　Just putting it out there.

　　我先把"这话儿"说在前头

　　Just put it back in there.

　　把你"那话儿"收进里头

　　I'm so excited I don't even know where to start.

　　我好激动 都不知道从何说起了

　　Drumroll please.

　　请击鼓

　　No? Okay.

　　不击吗 好吧

　　Oh interesting.

　　有意思

　　Here we have a bill from the pet castle

　　你有张来自宠物城堡的账单

　　yet you don't have a pet and you've never been to a castle...

　　可你从没有过宠物 也没去过城堡

　　Oh except White Castle.

　　好吧 白城堡快餐店除外

　　You used a credit card at White Castle?

　　你居然在快餐店用信用卡

　　Yep. That was good weed.

　　是啊 大麻抽完肚子饿了

　　And the pet thing was 'cause I found a stray

　　宠物费用是因为我发现一只流浪动物

　　and had to have her cleaned up

　　不把它清理干净

　　before I could get anyone to take her.

　　没人会想收养它

　　That would also explain the charge for neutering.

　　怪不得还有一笔绝育费用

　　Nah actually that was for me.

　　其实是我绝育

　　Can't have any more of these coming out.

　　以防有小麦克斯出来祸害人间

　　Do you really think it's fiscally smart to be taking in strays?

　　你真的认为收留流浪动物是明智之举吗

　　Good point.

　　说得对

　　Move out tonight.

　　今晚你就搬走吧

　　What is this... a student loan?

　　这是什么 学生贷款

　　Oh my God. Max you went to college?

　　天啊 麦克斯 你还上过大学啊

　　That wasn't a judgment. It was just shocking...

　　不是说你不像读书人 只是震惊

　　kind of like seeing a baby smoke on the Internet.

　　像网上抽烟的婴儿影片一样出人意料嘛

　　I love that kid.

　　我爱死那小孩了

　　Max a student loan is the worst bill you can ignore.

　　麦克斯 学生贷款是最不能忽视的债务

　　It can never be expunged.

　　它会犹如附骨之疽一般

　　We're breaking out "expunged" on a weeknight?

　　又不是特殊节日 用这么高档的字眼干嘛啊

　　You can't run away from this bill.

　　这笔债你是躲不掉的

　　I can run away from anything.

　　只要我想躲 没有躲不掉

　　I'm on my fifth identity.

　　我都用到第五个身份了