I will be 40 this year and really want to celebrate this milestone in my life. In the past, my husband has told me he needs plenty of notice to plan something special for my birthday, but we've never done much.

Six months before my birthday, I asked him to plan a party for me. He said he thought it was a great idea and would take care of it. Well, Annie, it's only one week until the big day and he hasn't planned any kind of party. I am crushed.

I never ask this man for anything. I am the cheerleader, the cook, the laundress and the nurse. I wasn't asking for an elaborate event, just 30 people or so.

If I want the party now, I'd have to plan it myself. I am so hurt. Am I wrong? － Doesn't Matter AnymoreDear Doesn't Matter:

Your husband likely had no idea what to do or where to begin. He was overwhelmed by the need to make it special－so he procrastinated.

Unless he's planning to surprise you, your expectations may have been unrealistic. He needed guidance. Do something less grand for this birthday and plan a party for your 45th. Be sure to give him a guest list and some practical suggestions.