If one can afford to treat the other to a meal at an expensive restaurant and the other does not have enough money to do the same, it will cause problems in the relationship.

如果一个人能够支付起请朋友去昂贵餐厅吃饭的费用，而另一个人却没有足够的钱回请，那么这样的友谊会产生问题。

Westerns expect friends to be independent.

西方人希望朋友间是相互独立的。

Western people prefer people to be independent, so they do not feel comfortable in a relationship in which one person is giving more and the other is dependent on what is giving.

因为有了这样的独立意识，对于朋友间一方给予多，另一方难以对等给予的这种关系，他们觉得这种友谊会令人不舒服。

Their friendship is mostly a matter of providing emotional support and spending time together.

他们的友谊更多意味着相互给予对方精神上的支持，一起度过一段时间。

A westerner will respond to a friend's trouble by asking "What do you want to do?"

一个西方人在回应朋友的求助时，常会问：“你想怎么做？”

The idea is to help the friend to think out the problem and discover the solution he or she really wants and then to support the solution.

帮助朋友的办法是思考问题，寻求他或者她确实需要的解决办法，并且支持对方那么去做。

Chinese friends give each other more concrete help. A Chinese will use personal connections to help a friend get something hard to obtain such as a job, or an appointment with a good doctor.

中国人给予朋友更多具体的帮助。他或者她可能会利用自己的关系帮助朋友取得不容易得到的东西，比如一份工作，约见一位好医生。

Chinese friends give each other money and might help each other out financially over a long time.

中国人可能会在经济上给予相互的帮助，比如给对方金钱帮助他或者她度过难关。

Chinese usually expect more from their friends.

中国人期望得到朋友更多的帮助。

In the West, you can certainly ask friend to do something with you, but you recognize that your friend may say no, if he/she gives you a reason.

在西方，你可以问朋友是否可以为你做点什么，但是你会发现他们可能会说不，他或者她可能会给你一个理由。

You would not expect a friend to drop everything to respond to a non-urgent need such as shopping.

你不会指望一个朋友放下手头的事情陪你做些不要紧的事情，比如购物。

Nor would you expect a friend to recognize and respond to your wishes without stating them.

也不会期待在你没有跟他们表明的情况下，了解和回应你的愿望。

A friend in China is someone who offers help without waiting to be asked. There are few limits to what you can expect from a friend.

一个中国朋友当你遇到困难时，会主动伸出援助之手。你对朋友的期望的限制很少。

You can feel free to tell your friend what he/she can or should do to help or please you.

你可以随时告诉你的朋友他或者她应该怎么来帮助你或者让你高兴。