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Batman:Where is it?

Joker:_(1)_ cost nothing,Batman.A please wouldn't go amiss.I mean...If you wanted to be cured so badly,you only had to ask.It looks like I need to _____(2)_____.

Batman:There's nothing you can teach me,Joker.

Joker:Oh,come on.There's always something to learn.Let's start with "Getting your ass kicked 101".Seconds out!