The Living Flag（在线收听）

Tomorrow is ¹⁾Flag Day in Lake Wobegon. I don’t know if it’s observed here in the cities, but it is in Lake Wobegon. The Chamber of Commerce still has some flags on the poles with the nails at the end you can stick into the ground, out in front of your house. You want to see Duane down at the Feed and Seed or stop by Skoglin’s yet this evening and pick up yours. I believe that is all that they do on Flag Day is just fly flags in Lake Wobegon, I can’t really think of what else you could do on Flag Day. Though they did used to do more.

    It seems to me I heard that back in 1936, about 400 people in Lake Wobegon put on red, white and blue caps and they formed what they called the living flag out on Main Street. The problem was that there were so many people in the living flag, there weren’t many people left over to appreciate it. But they did it. I think it was the idea of a traveling cap salesman who came through town. But Janmeer Inquist more or less organized it and he didn’t see why anybody should have to see it, he thought it was a patriotic thing and it should be enough for people just to realize that they were a part of the living flag.

    But as they were standing there on Main Street, of course somebody ²⁾broke ranks and they said, “Excuse me, I’ll be right back.” And they went and ran up on the roof of the Central Building right there, and they stood up there and looked down on it, and they said, “Oh, it’s beautiful! You otta see it.” And then of course everybody had to have a look. It took hours, one person at a time, leaving the living flag and running up to the roof of the Central Building up there and looking down at it and admiring it. And of course after a while, the people who had already had their look were saying, “OK, that’s it now, we can go home.” And the people who didn’t have a look were saying, “Hey, hold on now, we didn’t get our chance.” So every single last one of them had to go up there one at a time, and tempers were running short, and the living flag was becoming a sort of sitting and kneeling flag.

    It was a warm June afternoon, until finally they came down to Mrs. Quigley, who was the last one. And they said, “Alright go now, Mary, go now and make it quick.” And she said, “Oh no.” She said, “I don’t wancha to go to any trouble on my account.” she said, “I don’t need to.” They said, “Go look at it! Go look at the flag, would yuh now.” She said, “Oh no, I’ve seen flags before, and I don’t need to look at this one.” The whole lower right hand corner of that flag grabbed her and they ³⁾hustled her up the stairs and up on the roof of the Central Building, and they leaned her out and they made her look down at it. And then of course somebody thought they would run home and get a camera.

    So that’s why they don’t do much for Flag Day any more, in Lake Wobegon, but they will be flying the flag tomorrow.

Well, that’s the news from Lake Wobegon, Minnesota, where all the women are strong and all the men are good looking and all the children are above average.CE