He and Jessica were talking animatedly about the snow fight as we got in line to buy food. 我们排队买饭的时候，他和杰西卡在绘声绘色地谈论打雪仗的情形。

I glanced toward that table in the corner out of habit. 我习惯性地瞥了角落里的那张桌子一眼，

And then I froze where I stood. 然后就僵在那儿了。

There were five people at the table. 桌上坐着5个人。

Jessica pulled on my arm. 杰西卡拽了一下我的胳膊。

"Hello? Bella? What do you want?" "喂？贝拉？你要点儿什么？"

I looked down; my ears were hot. 我垂下头望着地上；双耳滚烫。

I had no reason to feel self conscious, I reminded myself. 我没有理由感到不好意思，我提醒自己。

I had not done anything wrong. 我没做错什么。

"What's with Bella?" Mike asked Jessica. "贝拉怎么啦？"迈克问杰西卡。

"Nothing," I answered. "没事儿，"我回答，

"I'll just get a soda today." I caught up to the end of the line. "今天我就要一杯苏打水。"我追上了队尾。

"Are not you hungry?" Jessica asked. "你不饿？"杰西卡问。

"Actually, I feel a little sick," I said, my eyes still on the floor. "实际上，我有点儿不舒服，"我说，双眼依然望着地上。

I waited for them to get their food, and then followed them to a table, my eyes on my feet. 我等候他们买好饭，然后跟着他们去了一张桌子，两眼看着自己的双脚。

I sipped my soda slowly, my stomach churning. 我不紧不慢地啜饮自己的苏打水，胃里直翻腾。

Twice Mike asked, with unnecessary concern, how I was feeling. 迈克问了两遍，瞎操心，问我感觉如何。

I told him it was nothing, but I was wondering if I should play it up and escape to the nurse's office for the next hour. 我告诉他没事儿，可我心里在想，下节课我是不是应该装不舒服，逃到护士办公室去。

Ridiculous. 可笑。

I should not have to run away. 我又没做亏心事，凭什么非得逃跑啊？

I decided to permit myself one glance at the Cullen family's table. 我决定让自己再瞥爱德华他们几个坐的那张桌子一眼。

If he was glaring at me, I would skip Biology, like the coward I was. 要是他在瞪我的话，我就逃掉生物课了，就像从前一样，再当一回胆小鬼。

I kept my head down and glanced up under my lashes. 我没抬起头来，而是从睫毛下面往上瞥了一眼。

None of them were looking this way. 他们谁都没望着这个方向。

I lifted my head a little. 我稍微抬了抬头。

They were laughing. 他们在哈哈大笑。

Edward, Jasper, and Emmett all had their hair entirely saturated with melting snow. 爱德华、贾斯帕和埃美特的头发全都让融雪彻底浸透了。

Alice and Rosalie were leaning away as Emmett shook his dripping hair toward them. 爱丽丝和罗莎莉正歪向一侧，因为埃美特冲她俩在使劲儿甩着滴水的头发。

They were enjoying the snowy day, just like everyone else -only they looked more like a scene from a movie than the rest of us. 他们在尽情享受雪天的乐趣，就像所有其他人一样——只是他们比我们其余的人更像是某部电影里的一个镜头。

But, aside from the laughter and playfulness, there was something different, and I could not quite pinpoint what that difference was. 不过，除了笑声和顽皮之外，还是有一些不一样的地方，是什么地方不一样，我说不太准确。

I examined Edward the most carefully. 我对爱德华的观察最为仔细。

His skin was less pale, I decided—flushed from the snow fight maybe—the circles under his eyes much less noticeable. 他的皮肤没那么苍白了，我判定——或许是打雪仗打红了的——他眼睛下面的眼圈远没有前几天那样明显了。

But there was something more. 但还不止这些。

I pondered, staring, trying to isolate the change. 我一边盯着瞧，一边回想，试图找出是哪里有了变化。

"Bella, what are you staring at?" "贝拉，你在盯着瞧什么呀？"

Jessica intruded, her eyes following my stare. 杰西卡扰乱了我的思路，她顺着我的目光看了过去。

At that precise moment, his eyes flashed over to meet mine. 就在那一刻，他的目光闪过来和我的碰了个正着。

I dropped my head, letting my hair fall to conceal my face. 我低下了头，让头发垂下来遮住了我的脸。

I was sure, though, in the instant our eyes met, that he did not look harsh or unfriendly as he had the last time I'd seen him. 虽然我们的目光只有那么一霎那的交汇，然而，我可以有把握地说，他的目光不像上次我看到他时那么锐利和不友好了。

He looked merely curious again, unsatisfied in some way. 他显得只是又很好奇了，还有些不满。

"Edward Cullen is staring at you," Jessica giggled in my ear. "爱德华·卡伦在盯着你看呢，"杰西卡在我耳边咯咯地笑着说道。

"He does not look angry, does he?" I could not help asking. "他看上去没有生气，对吧？"我禁不住问道。

"No," she said, sounding confused by my question. "对，"她说，听上去好像让我给问糊涂了，

"Should he be?" "他应该生气吗？"

"I do not think he likes me," I confided. "我认为他不喜欢我，"我吐露了自己的想法。

I still felt queasy. 我还是感觉要吐。

I put my head down on my arm. 我把头放到了胳膊上。

"The Cullens do not like anybody ...well, they do not notice anybody enough to like them. "卡伦他们几个谁都不喜欢……唔，他们对谁都不多瞅几眼，怎么会喜欢呢？

But he's still staring at you." 不过他还在盯着你瞧呢。"

"Stop looking at him," I hissed. "别看他了，"我嘘声说道。

She snickered, but she looked away. 她发出了窃笑，但还是把目光移开了。

I raised my head enough to make sure that she did, contemplating violence if she resisted. 我抬起头看了看她，以确认她没有继续在看爱德华，思量着要是她拒不服从，我就使用暴力。

Mike interrupted us then—he was planning an epic battle of the blizzard in the parking lot after school and wanted us to join. 这时，迈克打断了我们——他正在筹划放学后在停车场搞一次超大规模的雪仗，并且想要我们参加。

Jessica agreed enthusiastically. 杰西卡热烈响应，

The way she looked at Mike left little doubt that she would be up for anything he suggested. 她看迈克的那副样子，叫人看了丝毫不会怀疑，迈克让她干什么她都会乖乖地去干。

I kept silent. 我保持沉默。

I would have to hide in the gym until the parking lot cleared. 我恐怕得躲在体育馆里，等停车场没人了再出来。