这天是半休日。威廉在自己的卧室里，认真地为下午与他那几位不法分子的同伴的见面做着准备。他和他的这几位同伴自称“不法分子”。他们总是在半休日这天见面，一起去体验冒险，然后在他们的谷仓旁一起搞个篝火晚会。

　　“Oh! I’m so glad you’ve come, dear. And is this the baby!” This was William’s mother. “Oh, crumbs!” said William and retreated hastily. He sat down on his bed to wait till the coast was clear. Soon came the sound of footsteps ascending the stairs. “Oh, William,” said his mother, as she entered his room, “Mrs. Butler’s come with her baby to spend the afternoon, and we’d arranged to go out till tea-time with the baby, but she’s got such a headache, I’m insisting on her lying down for the afternoon in the drawing-room. But she’s so worried about the baby not getting out this nice afternoon.”

　　“哦！亲爱的，我很高兴你能来。小宝贝也来啦！”这是威廉的母亲在说话。“哎呀，不好！”威廉边自言自语边慌忙地向后退了几步。他坐在床上等待着危险警报的解除。不一会儿，传来了上楼梯的脚步声。“哦，威廉，”他的母亲走进他的房间对他说，“巴特勒太太带着孩子来咱家了，我们本打算带她家的宝贝出去逛逛，下午茶时候再回来，可巴特勒太太头痛，我就坚持让她在客厅躺下休息会儿。但她觉得这么好的天气不带孩子出去玩太可惜了。”

　　“Oh!” said William, without interest. “I told Mrs. Butler I was sure you wouldn’t mind taking the baby out for a bit in the perambulator!” William stared at her, speechless. “Me?” he said. “Me? Me take a baby out in a pram?” “Now, William, I’m sure you’d like to help, and I’m sure you wouldn’t like your father to hear that you wouldn’t even do a little thing like that for poor Mrs. Butler. And she’s got such a headache.” “All right,” he muttered, “I’ll be down in a minute.”

　　“哦！”威廉敷衍地回答道。“我跟巴特勒太太说了，我确信你不介意推着婴儿车带着孩子出去玩会儿！”威廉盯着母亲，哑口无言。“我？”他说，“我？我推着婴儿车，带着一个婴儿出去？”“没错，就现在，威廉，我确信你愿意帮忙。而且，我确信你不会希望让你父亲听到你连帮助可怜的巴特勒太太这样一点儿小事也做不了。何况，巴特勒太太确实头疼得厉害。”“好吧，”他咕哝着回答说，“我这就下楼。”

　　He heard them fussing over the baby in the hall. “Here he is, dear, all ready for you, and you needn’t go far away—just up and down the road, if you like, but stay out till tea-time. He’s a dear little baby, isn’t he? And isn’t it a nice Willy-Billy den, to take it out a nice ta-ta, while it’s mummy goes bye-byes, den?” William blushed for pure shame.

　　他听到大人们在大厅里手忙脚乱地摆弄着婴儿。 “准备好了，亲爱的，你不需要带他去太远的地方——就推着婴儿车随便在路上走来走去就行，但要到下午茶时间再回来。小宝贝很可爱，不是吗？而且天气很不错，带小家伙出去好好玩玩儿，让他离开妈妈一会儿，怎么样？”威廉的脸红了，这脸红纯粹是因为觉得很丢人。

　　He pushed the pram down to the end of the road and round the corner. “A nice way for an Outlaw to spend the afternoon!” He thought to himself. “Blab—blab—blab—blab—blub—blub—blub!” The baby said. “Oh, you shut up!” said William crushingly. Suddenly a Great Idea came to him.

　　他把婴儿车推到路的尽头，转过路的拐角。“这条路简直就是为不法分子精心准备的！我知道这个下午该怎么过了！”他心想。婴儿巴拉巴拉说个不停。“闭嘴！”威廉大声命令道。突然间，一个很棒的想法进入他的头脑。

　　He went to the barn where he’d always meet his fellow outlaws, and entered with the baby in his arms. He was greeted by a sudden silence. “It’s a kidnap,” said William, triumphantly. “We’ll get a ransom on it.” They gazed at him in awed admiration. This was surely the cream of outlawry. “Dad—dad—dad—dad—dad!” Douglas, the tallest boy, grinned sheepishly. “It thinks I’m its father,” he explained complacently to the company.

　　他来到了他与他的那些不法分子同伴碰面的老地点——谷仓。他怀里抱着婴儿进入了谷仓。看到他，同伴们突然沉默了下来。“我绑架了个小孩，”威廉耀武扬威地说道。“我们可以用他换赎金。”同伴们向他投来敬畏的目光。这种非法的手段简直绝了。“爸爸-爸爸-爸爸-爸爸！”个子最高的男孩道格拉斯羞怯地咧嘴笑了笑。“他以为我是他爸爸。”他沾沾自喜地向同伴们解释道。

　　“What do we do first? That’s the question.” “In books,” said the outlaw called Ginger, “they write a note to its people and say they want a ransom.” “We won’t do that—not just yet,” said William hastily. “Why not?” said Ginger. “Who’s got a paper and pencil? I’m simply statin’ a fact. Who’s got a paper and pencil?” No one spoke. “Oh, yes!” went on William in triumph. “Go on! Write a note. Write a note without paper and pencil, and we’ll all watch. Huh!”

　　“我们首先怎么做？这是个问题。”“书里说”，名字叫金杰的不法之徒说，“绑架者会给被绑架者的家人写一个纸条，告诉他们用赎金换人。”我们不这样做，至少现在不行。”威廉匆匆说道。“我觉得行！”金杰说，“谁有纸和笔？听我的没错。谁有纸和笔？”没有人回答。“好嘞！”威廉得意洋洋地接着说道，“继续啊！写一张纸条。我们要看看没有纸和笔，你怎么写纸条，哈！”

　　“Well,” said Ginger sulkily, “I don’t s’pose they had paper and pencils in outlaw days. They weren’t invented. They wrote on—on—on leaves or something,” he ended vaguely. “Well, go on. Write on leaves,” said William still more triumphant. “We’re not stoppin’ you are we? I’m simply statin’ a fact. Write on leaves.”

　　“好吧，”金杰生气地说，“我也觉得不法之徒做非法的事情时，不应该带着纸和笔。这些东西还没发明出来。他们应该在……在……在树叶或别的东西上写字。”他含糊地说完了他的话。“好吧，继续啊，就在树叶上写纸条，”威廉说，表现得更加得意洋洋，“我们不会阻止你的，没错吧，其他人？听我的没错。快在树叶上写纸条啊！”

　　They were interrupted by a yell of pain from Douglas. With vague memories of his mother’s treatment of infants, he had inserted a finger in its mouth. The infant happened to possess four front teeth, two upper and two lower, and they closed like a vice upon Douglas’ finger. He was now examining the marks.

　　他们被道格拉斯发出的一阵痛苦的喊叫声打断了。由于他已经记不清他的母亲是怎样照顾婴儿的了，于是他把自己的一根手指伸进了婴儿的嘴里。婴儿碰巧张了四颗门牙，两颗上牙，两颗下牙，它们像台钳一样夹住了道格拉斯的手指。现在，他正在查看自己手指上的牙印。

　　“Look! Right deep down! See it? Wotcher think of that! Nearly to the bone! Pretty savage baby you’ve brought along,” he said to William. “Anyway, what have we brought for the feast?” William produced liquorice water and half a cake, Douglas two slices of raw ham and a dog biscuit, Ginger some popcorn and some cold boiled potatoes wrapped up in newspaper, Henry a cold apple dumpling and a small bottle of paraffin-oil. “Let’s put them on the floor here”, said Ginger, and go out for adventures first. Back in a quarter of an hour for the feast.”

　　“看！咬得真狠的！看见没？不敢相信，几乎咬到骨头了！你带来的婴儿太野蛮了！”他对威廉说。“嗯，好吧。还是看看大家都为晚上的盛宴带来了什么好吃的？”威廉带来了自制的甘草水和半块蛋糕；道格拉斯带来了两片生火腿和一块硬饼干；金杰用报纸裹来了一些爆米花和一些冷煮土豆；亨利带来了一个冷苹果布丁和一小瓶石蜡油。“我们把吃的都放在地板上，”金杰说，“然后，我们先去出去探探险，一刻钟后再回来吃大餐。”

　　They came back in 15 minutes, opened the door of the barn and went in. The infant was sitting on the floor among the stores, or rather among what was left of them. There was paraffin-oil on its hair, face, arms, frock and feet. It was drenched in paraffin-oil. The empty bottle and its hat lay by its side. Mingled with the paraffin-oil all over its person was cold boiled potato. It was holding the apple-dumpling in its hand.

　　15分钟后，他们回来了，打开谷仓的门，进入了谷仓。此时，婴儿正坐地板上他们的大餐中间，更确切地说是他们剩下的大餐中间。他的头发、脸、手臂、上衣和脚上都黏满了石蜡油。他已经被石蜡油浸透了。空瓶子和瓶盖躺在他的身边。他已经被混在一起的冷煮土豆和石蜡油裹得严严实实的，手里还抓着苹果布丁。

　　“Ball!” it announced ecstatically from behind its mask of potato and paraffin-oil. They stood in silence for a minute. There was no doubt that when William condescended to adopt a phrase from any of his family’s vocabularies, he considerably overworked it. “Well, it did it itself. It’s no one else’s fault, is it?” “No, it’s not,” said William. “But that’s the sort of thing folks never see. Anyway, I’m goin’ to wash its face.” “What with?” William took out his grimy handkerchief and advanced upon his prey. His bottle of liquorice water was lying untouched in the corner. He took out the cork.

　　“球！”他脸上敷着土豆和石蜡油做成的面膜，狂喜地宣布着。这群不法分子默默地站在那里足有一分钟的时间。毫无疑问，威廉又得从家庭的词汇库中选出些好词了，而且这次他还得多做些功课。“好吧，都是他自己做的。不能赖别人，是吧？”“不，不行，”威廉说，“但这种事谁也没遇到过。不管怎样，我还是去给他洗个脸吧。”“用什么洗呢？”威廉拿出他那脏兮兮的手帕，朝他的猎物走去。他带来的那瓶甘草水还完好无损地躲在一个角落里。他拔下软木塞。

　　William started passing his handkerchief, moistened with liquorice water, over the surface of the baby’s face. The baby had caught a corner of it firmly between its teeth and refused to release it. “If you’d got to take this baby home like this,” he said, “you wouldn’t be thinking much about drinking liquorice water. I’m simply statin’——” “Oh, shut up saying that!” said Ginger in sudden exasperation. “I’m sick of it.” For many years afterwards William associated babies in his mind with paraffin-oil and potato. “Just help me get the potato out of its hair,” he pleaded; “never mind the oil and the rest of it.” “Doesn’t it look funny—all oil and potato and bits of cake!” said Ginger. “Oh! shut up about it,” said William irritably.

　　威廉开始用甘草水沾湿他的手帕，然后用湿手帕擦拭婴儿的脸颊。婴儿用牙牢牢地咬住了手帕的一角，不肯放开。“如果你不得不这样把婴儿带回家，”他说，“你就不要想再喝到甘草水了。听我的没错……”“嘿，闭嘴，别再说这个了！”金杰突然愤怒地说道。“烦死了！”多年后，在他的脑海中，威廉的形象还和婴儿以及石蜡油和土豆联系在一起。“快帮我把他头发里的土豆弄出来，”他恳求道，“别管油和其他脏东西了。”“他看起来不好笑吗？——所有的油、土豆还有蛋糕屑都混在一起了！”金杰说。“快闭嘴吧！”威廉烦躁地说。

　　Douglas placed the baby in its seat and William thoughtfully put up the hood to shield his charge as far as possible from the curious gaze of the passers-by. With a “heart steeled for any fate” William turned the corner into his own road. The baby’s mother was standing at his gate. “There you are!” she called. “I was getting quite anxious. Thank you so much, dear.”

　　道格拉斯将婴儿放在座位上，威廉贴心地为他戴上兜帽，尽可能别吸引到路人好奇的目光。威廉已经下定决心直面命运的安排。他转过拐角，走在回家的路上。婴儿的母亲正站在门口等候。“你们终于回来啦！”她喊道。“我都有点儿着急了。非常感谢你，亲爱的！”

　　BUT THAT IS WHAT SHE SAID BEFORE SHE SAW THE BABY!

　　但是，当她看到婴儿之后……