生活大爆炸第五季:第4集 Raj的拜金聋女友(上)（打印版）

"The entrance to the dungeon is a moss covered door.You manage to open it only to find yourself" "Face to face with a hideous, foul smelling,moss covered ogre." 你设法打开门结果发现自己通往地下城的入口是一道布满苔藓的大门布满苔藓的食人魔面对着一个丑陋恶臭

I say, "Hey, Ma, what's for dinner?" 我会跟他说"老妈今晚吃点啥呢"

The ogre is amused by your joke and allows you to pass. 食人魔被你的玩笑打动允许你进入了

Great. We spent five hours last night at Macy's registering for gifts.Looks like I'm finally going to have that darling little earthenware asparagus dish I've always wanted. 很好啊我们昨晚花了五小时在梅西百货挑选礼物看上去我终于能够品尝到

See, this is the good thing about having a girlfriend 9,000 miles away. 看吧这就是女友远在天边的好处了

I can spend my nights doing whatever I want. 我起码可以在晚上为所欲为

You mean like playing nerd games with us and then taking a suspiciously long shower? 你指的是跟我们玩完书呆子游戏后再去冲个可疑的长时间热水澡吗

Really? So we're playing Dungeons & Dragons and we walk into a dungeon and see a dragon? 不是吧我们玩的这叫《龙与地下城》然后进入地下城就看见一条龙

When you play Chutes and Ladders, do you complain about all the chutes and all the ladders? 当你玩梯子滑道游戏时你抱怨过所有的滑道和梯子吗

Maybe. Why not?Who do I have in my life to watch my figure for? 也许吧为啥不行我的人生又有谁值得去为之奋斗呢

Oh, God, did you watch Bridget Jones again? 天哪你是不是又看了一遍《BJ单身日记》

No, it's just that everybody's got someone. 不是啊因为大家都有了归属

Now that Howard's getting married,maybe he'll inflate one of his old girlfriends for you. 既然霍华德要结婚了他可能会在众多充气娃娃中挑一个前女友送你

You know who I blame for my loneliness? 你知道我的孤独是谁的错吗

Your movies and your TV shows promised streets paved with beautiful blonde women with big bazongas. 你们的电影和电视剧承诺这里的街道满是漂亮的金发巨乳美女

Eat another pie, you'll have your own bazongas. 再吃个馅饼你就能拥有自己的巨乳了

That's cruel.You know it goes straight to my hips. 你太伤人了。你知道我的肥肉只会长在屁股上

Gentlemen, please focus.You're facing a fire breathing dragon. 先生们请专心点你们现在面对着一条喷火龙

Well, good Lord,if that becomes a reason not to play Dungeons & Dragons,this game's in serious trouble. 我的亲娘七舅老爷如果因为这就不玩《龙与地下城》那这游戏算走到头了

Our whole universe was in a hot dense state,then nearly fourteen billion years ago expansion started. Wait... 我们的宇宙进入了极热的高浓度状态，后来，140亿年前它开始扩张。等等……

The Earth began to cool,the autotrophs began to drool,neanderthals developed tools, we built a wall (we built the pyramids), 地球开始冷却，自养生物开始繁殖,穴居人学会使用工具，我们开始建墙（我们还建了金字塔）

Math, science, history, unraveling the mysteries,That all started with the big bang!bang! 数学、科学、历史解开了宇宙之谜。这一切从宇宙大爆炸开始。

Now, I assume we use this same wax later on to neaten up each other's bikini regions. 等会儿我们还用这些蜡剂来互相清理我们的比基尼部位(比基尼部位:女性的三个隐私部位)

So, Bernadette, how's the wedding planning going? 伯纳黛特婚礼筹划得怎样了

And I'm not asking as a prospective bridesmaid.Pick me! Pick me! 我这么问可不是想成为伴娘候选人哦快选我吧选我吧

We went cake tasting yesterday.Raj came along. 我们昨天去试吃婚宴蛋糕了拉杰也来了

He cried and ate half the samples. 他痛哭流涕还吃掉一半的蛋糕样品

Oh, the poor guy's so lonely.We should set him up with someone. 那可怜的家伙太孤独了我们应该给他找个伴儿

You know, I met a really cute girl at work.She's married to a guy in one of our drug trials. 我工作时遇到了个可爱的女孩儿她嫁给了我们那儿一位药品临床试验者

Yeah, but her husband is in serious congestive heart failure,and a little birdie told me he's in the placebo group. 是啊但她老公目前处于充血性心脏衰竭状态据称他现在已经被安排到安慰剂组了(安慰剂：并不能使病人得到有效治疗，但却"预料"或"相信"治疗有效，而让病患症状得到舒缓)

Okay, so future grief stricken widow is the one to beat. 好吧未来又多一位悲伤的寡妇亟待他人的抚慰了

Yes. From here on in, I've decided to make all trivial decisions with a throw of the dice,thus freeing up my mind do what it does best enlighten and amaze. 是的从这刻起我决定以后不重要的决定都通过掷骰子决定这样可以为我的头脑腾出时间做它最擅长的事儿:启迪思维震惊世界

Um, Howard, can I see you for a minute, please? 霍华德我能找你有点事儿吗

I don't want to show any more of your friends how I can fit in the booster seats. 我不想再给你的朋友们表演我是如何坐进幼儿加高座椅里了

Uh, no, that's not it. Just come with me, please. 额不是让你做这个请跟我来吧

Let's see what I'll be washing that succotash down with. 我们看看喝点什么来配豆煮玉米

That's the great thing.It doesn't matter.My mind is freed up to think about more important things. 这才是最精彩的地方选什么无所谓我的头脑能够有更多时间思考更重要的事情

Um, Raj, there's someone I want you to meet.This is my friend Emily. I know her from my spin class. 拉杰我这有个朋友想介绍给你认识这是我的朋友艾米丽我在健身课上认识的

Raj, relax. She can't hear you. She's deaf. 拉杰淡定她听不见你说什么她是聋人

Look at you guys just hitting it off.I am so good. 看你俩多合得来呀我真是超级红娘

Does she really mean that or was she signing it sarcastically? 她是认真的还是在损我呀

Raj says it's nice to meet you, too. 拉杰说他也很高兴认识你

She says she has to go back to her family,but Penny has her number if you want to text her and get together. 她说她得回去陪家人了但你若想发短信给她约她出来聚聚的话你可以找佩妮要她的电话

Okay, I'm going to play it cool.Tell her, "Maybe. Whatever, babe." 好吧我决定扮酷跟她说"再说吧到时候再看宝贝儿"

And now for dessert...Come on, hot fudge sundae, come on, hot fudge sundae. 现在到甜点了拜托朱古力新地我要朱古力新地

Okay, as soon as she gets here,so she knows I'm cool with it,I'm going to make a joke about her being deaf. 好吧等她一到为了让她知道我不介意她听不到我要就她的耳聋开个玩笑

I was thinking, "Hey, did you hear the one about...? Oh, no, I bet you didn't." 比如说嘿你听说过那个什么没有对哦我忘了你听不见了

Maybe we should revisit your lonely fat guy plan. 你还是老老实实当回你的单身肥男好了

Tell her, her eyes shimmer like opalescent lilies in the lake of the palace of the celestial maidens. 跟她说她的眼睛就像是天女宫湖中乳白色百合一样闪烁

Really?That's the first thing you want to say? 真的吗你一上来就要说这句话吗

Look, I don't know the sign for opalescent. 我不知道"乳白色"的手语

You're making me sound like a caveman. 这下好了我听上去就像是个山顶洞人

She says, "Thank you. You have nice eyes, too." 她说 "谢谢你的眼睛也很漂亮"

Really? Ask her how many children she wants,and whatever number she says, say, "Me, too." 真的吗问她想要几个孩子不管她说多少你就说"我也是"

Fine. Tell her I have a deep, sexy voice like James Earl Jones. 好吧那就跟她说我的声音低沉性感就像詹姆斯·厄尔·琼斯一样(美国影星曾给《狮子王》中老国王配音)

She doesn't know what James Earl Jones sounds like. 她哪知道詹姆斯·厄尔·琼斯的声音什么样啊

Great. Then she won't know I'm lying. 正好那她就不会知道我在骗人了

Let's see, what else can I tell you about me that would make you like me? 让我想想我还能跟你说点我的什么来让你喜欢我呢

She says, "Do you play an instrument?" 她问 "你会弹奏乐器吗"

No,but when I was six years old,I tried to start a boy band called Frankie Goes to Bollywood. 不会但是我六岁的时候曾经想要成立一个男生乐队叫"法兰基到宝莱坞"(模仿Frankie Goes To Hollywood英国老牌乐队)

But I couldn't get any other boys to join,so my parents asked the servants to be my backup dancers. 但是我找不到其他男生肯跟我组队于是我父母就只好叫我家的仆人来做我的候补舞者

Wait, when you sign "servants",don't sign it like I'm bragging.Sign it in a way that I sound humble with just a hint of "That's right, I had servants." 等一下你比划"仆人"的时候别比划得好像我在炫耀一样要比划成我很谦虚同时又透露出"没错我有仆人"那种感觉

Yes, but she doesn't. So get signing, hand monkey. 怕啥反正她又听不见快比划呀长臂猿

I think I wrote a letter to Santa Claus every day.And then on Christmas morning,under the tree is a little puppy with a red ribbon. 我每天都给圣诞老人写一封信终于到了圣诞节的早上我在圣诞树下找到一只系着红缎带的小狗

Texting Bernadette that I'm gonna be late. 给伯纳黛特发短信告诉她我今晚要晚点回去

It's a funny story about a puppy.Just smile and laugh. 她在讲一个关于狗狗的搞笑故事你就跟着笑就对了

The puppy died it choked on a doll head. Sad face, sad face! 小狗后来死掉了它吞了一个娃娃的头表情悲哀表情悲哀

It's a little hard to see with the city lights,but that W shaped constellation is Cassiopeia. 在城市闪耀的灯火下有点看不清楚但是那个W形状的星座就是仙后座

And she was the mother of Andromeda who's over there. 旁边的是仙女座也就是仙后座的女儿

I speak sign language, I don't read minds. 我只会打手语而已又不会读心术

If you were me, would you kiss her? 如果你是我的话你会不会吻她

Oh, fine. Let's agree she kissed both of us. 好吧那就当她亲了我们两个

生活大爆炸 第五季:第4集 Raj的拜金聋女友(上)（在线收听）

生活大爆炸第五季:第4集 Raj的拜金聋女友(上)（在线收听）