You don't sing a song and not finish it. 总不能唱个开头没结尾吧

Hither, page, and stand by me If thou know'st it telling，Yonder peasant, who is he? 嗟尔侍者来务必据实语彼处何许人

Where and what his dwelling? Brightly shone the moon that night, though the frost... 此人何所居是夜月皎皎，寒霜亦凄...

It Looks like he's doing pretty good.Of course he is. 看来他进展不错啊。那是当然了。

Look, that girl just got dumped by her boyfriend. 那姑娘刚被男朋友甩了

She's angry, she's drunk,and her favorite movie is Slumdog Millionaire. I mean... 满心愤怒，又醉得烂醉最爱的电影还是印度电影《贫民窟的百万富翁》

That is some lowhanging fruit.Oh, here he comes. 必须手到擒来啊。他回来了

So, how'd it go? Great.I bought her a couple of drinks,and she gave me her Email address. 怎么样啊？ 一切顺利。我请她喝了几杯酒她就把邮箱地址给我了

"Jennifer@notevenifyouwere thelastguyonearth.loser"" What? 杰妮芙@就算男人死光了只剩你都不要.废柴，什么？

I'm sorry, Raj.Why can't I find someone? 真遗憾，拉杰。我怎么就找不到我的佳人呢？

I'm smart, I've got a cool job,and my naturally bronzed complexion means I can pull off mustard yellow in a way most guys can't. 我智商高，工作好，天生古铜的肤色说明别人穿了难看的芥末黄，我也能穿得帅气

Oh, honey, it's not you, it's them.No, it's not. 亲爱的，不怪你，是她们脑子有病。不是的

She was too beautiful for me.Why would you say that?  It's true. 她太漂亮了我高攀不上。你怎么会说这种话？是真的。

I'm always attracted to women I can't have.I do it all the time. 我总是迷恋自己得不到的姑娘。我老是这样

I did the same thing with the two of you. The two of them? I don't understand. 我以前对你们两个就是啊。她们两个？我不太明白

Well, uh, there was a time when I had a thing for Penny,and I thought she was into me, too, 曾经有段时间我暗恋过佩妮而且当时我以为她也喜欢我

because she got drunk and naked and climbed into bed with me. 因为有一次她喝醉后脱光跟我爬上了床

But apparently I misread those signals. 但很显然是我自作多情了

And you liked Bernadette also? 你也喜欢过伯纳黛特啊

That was before Penny. 那是在佩妮之前

I make it a rule to only fall for one of my friends' girlfriends at a time. 我自己定了个规矩一次只能爱上一位好朋友的女朋友

I'm very oldfashioned that way. 这方面我挺传统的

So at, uh, some point, you probably had a thing for me, too. 也就是说你曾经也喜欢过我了吧

No, not really.Oh, come on, Raj, not even a little bit? 那倒没有。拜托，拉杰，一点都没有吗？

Not that I can think of.Think harder. Nope. 反正我想不起来这样过。给老娘仔细想。没有

I guess the heart wants what the heart wants. 我的心会跟着心的感觉走吧

Or in this case, doesn't.I mean, at all.What? 而她不是我的菜。完全没兴趣。看我干嘛

Ye who now will bless the poor Shall yourselves find blessing Done? 但能济贫士赐福自返还，完啦

I think the word you're looking for is "bravo." 你想说的唱完赞叹词应该是"棒啊"

Okay, you leave the room and find yourself standing before a pool of melted snowmen. 现在你们离开那个房间发现自己来到一个里面有融化的雪人的池子面前

Melted snowmen?Are there carrots and lumps of coal in the water? 融化的雪人？水里有雪人五官的胡萝卜和煤块吗？

I don't know. What's the difference? It's a game of the imagination, Leonard.Paint a picture. 不知道。有差别吗？这是个幻想游戏，莱纳德给我好好描述画面，

Fine.You leave the room and find yourself standing before a pool of melted snowmen. 好吧。你离开那个房间发现自己来到一个里面有融化的雪人的池子面前

There are carrots and lumps of coal in the water. 水里尽是胡萝卜和煤块

Do we know what happened to the top hats and the corncob pipes? 那雪人的大帽子和烟斗上哪了呢

You see those, too.Oh, it's like I'm really there. 你也看见它们在水里了。真是身临其境呀。

I gotta tell you, thisthis is the most holiday fun I've had since my therapist changed my anxiety medication 自从我的治疗师换了我的焦虑症药而且我也再也不在乎我的血便后

and I stopped caring about the blood in my stool.Good story.What are you drinking there? 我不得不说  这是我最开心的过节了。好故事。你喝什么呢？

Little eggnog?Yes. What, is there a problem? 蛋奶酒吗？是的。怎么了，不行吗？

No, it's nice to see you enjoying a holiday beverage.  Pretty Christmasy. 看你喝圣诞饮品挺好的，很有节日氛围。

Since when is eggnog a Christmas drink? 蛋奶酒什么时候成圣诞专属了？

Eggs are available all year 'round. 一年四季都有鸡蛋生产

I've been known to enjoy this poolside.Come on, Sheldon. 大家都知道我爱在泳池边喝这个。拜托，谢尔顿。

You know all the Christmas stories, and the carols,you've got an eggnog mustache going on there. Just admit it. 你知道每一个圣诞故事和颂歌现在还喝出了个蛋奶酒小胡子承认吧

You're getting a little Yuletide spirit.Oh, don't be silly. 你挺喜欢圣诞的别傻了

Christmas is a bunch of baloney created by the tinsel industry. 圣诞节只不过是装饰品工业编出来骗钱的

Why is this so important to you? 对你来说有什么要紧的啊

Honestly, because I had enough crappy Christmases as a kid and I'm tired of you sucking the joy out of them now. 坦白说，因为我小时候的圣诞节都过得很糟现在不想你再扫我的兴了

What was so bad about them? 怎么过得不好了

I grew up in a house full of crazy academics. 我家人都是疯子学术家

Instead of leaving Santa milk and cookies,we had to leave him a research paper. 我们小孩不给圣诞老人留牛奶和饼干而是得留给他一份研究报告

And in the morning, you could tell he'd been there because the paper would be graded. 而第二天早晨你会知道圣诞老人来过因为你留的报告都评好分了

No wonder you love Christmas.That sounds amazing.It wasn't amazing. 怪不得你这么喜欢圣诞节。听起来真是太酷了。一点也不酷

I got a Cminus four years in a row. 我曾连续四年得了C

Yeah, I'm familiar with your work. Cminus was your gift. 我知道你的水平，C都算送了你大礼了。

Amy, I'm really sorry.I didn't mean to upset you.It's fine. 艾米，真是对不起。我不是故意让你难过的。没事。

I'm used to being the girl who never gets looked at twice. 我已经习惯被男生无视了

I didn't have my first kiss till I was 22,and the guy only did it so I'd give him back his insulin. 直到22岁我才等到我的初吻那人亲我是因为我拿他的胰岛素要挟

Sometimes the pancreas wants what the pancreas wants.Forget it. 有时候胰腺会跟着胰腺的感觉走，算了

I don't expect you guys to understand.I understand. 我没指望你们能明白，我明白

In seventh grade, I played Spin the Bottle and it landed on Alina Shankar. 七年级我玩"转瓶子"游戏时（瓶子指向谁 转的人就去亲对方）瓶子指向了爱林娜o香卡

She said if I came near her,she would break the bottle and cut me. 她说如果我敢靠近她她就敲碎瓶子捅我

You think that's bad? 你觉得这样算悲催吗

In college, I passed out at a frat party and woke up with more clothes on. 大学时，我在兄弟会派对上喝到不省人事醒来时发现衣服没少反而更多了

Sometimes I get so lonely,I sit on my left hand until it goes numb, then I put it in my right hand 有时候我感觉太孤单我会坐在左手上直到左手麻木然后用右手握住

and pretend I'm holding hands with another person. 假装是别人在握住我的手

I do that, too.Sometimes the left hand tries to cop a feel. 我也会这么做。有时候左手想伸伸禄山之爪。

And I let it. 我也任它随便摸

It's kind of nice to talk to someone who understands what it feels like to be alone. 能和了解孤单的人聊天感觉真是太好了

It is, isn't it?But you're not alone anymore. Now you've got Sheldon. I do. 是吧？但你现在不再孤单了。你有谢尔顿，是的。

And don't worry, someday you'll have somebody, too.Thank you. 别担心，终有一天你也会有佳人相伴的，谢谢

I hope she's half as lovely and amazing as you are.Thank you, Rajesh. 她只要有你一半美丽聪慧我就心满意足了。谢谢你，拉杰什

He wants me, I'm good. We can go now.Damn it.What? 他对我动心了，我满意了。撤我靠怎么了？

Now that I know she doesn't like me,I'm kind of into her.All right. 现在我知道她不喜欢我我好像有点喜欢她了。好了

I think I cracked the code to lower the drawbridge.Great. Let's do it. 我想我破解了密码可以放下吊桥了。太好了，开始吧。

The drawbridge is lowering. 吊桥正在缓缓放下

My carpal tunnel's acting up. 我的腕管综合症发作了

Play through the pain! You did it! The drawbridge is down. 痛也得坚持。成功了，吊桥放下了

You cross the chasm and find yourself in a small dungeon room. 你们跨过峡谷来到一间小小的地牢

And in the corner, chained to the wall,you see a bloodied and beaten Santa Claus. 在墙角是被铁链锁住被打到浑身鲜血的圣诞老人

He says, "Ho, ho, help me." Yes, we found Santa! 他说 "呵呵救命"太棒了，我们找到了圣诞老人

I take out my skeleton key and run to Santa to unchain him. 我取出万能钥匙跑向圣诞老人给他解开铁链

But first, I cast a spell of paralysis on Stuart and Howard. 但我抢先向斯图尔特和霍华德施了麻痹咒

What are you doing? 你这是干嘛

You can't talk; you're paralyzed. 你不能说话  你已经被我麻痹了

I get right up in Santa's big, fat face and say...Well, well, well,Jolly old Saint Nick, we meet again. 我来到圣诞老人的大肥脸跟前说瞧瞧瞧乐呵呵的圣诞老头儿  我们又见面了Jolly Old Saint Nicholas是一首着名的圣诞歌

Yeah, I believe the last time we spoke 我相信上次我们聊天

was in the Baybrook Mall in Galveston, Texas,when I was five years old, isn't that right? Uh, okay. 还是在德州加尔维斯顿市的溪湾商场我当时五岁，对吗？好吧

My mother dragged me there and she plopped me down on your lap and you asked me what I wanted for Christmas. 我妈硬把我拉去让我坐在你的大腿上你问我圣诞节想要什么

And I told you "My PopPop," because that was the year my grandfather died. 我告诉你 "我要我的外公"因为那年我的外公去世了

I missed him and I wanted him back. 我想他  我想让他死而复生

This is weird, right? 现在有点诡异，对吧？

PopPop was the only one in my family who encouraged me to pursue science. 家里只有外公一个人鼓励我追求科学的真谛

But you didn't bring him back, did you?Instead, I got Lincoln Logs. 但你没让他起死回生，对吗？我得到的礼物是林肯积木

Well, you can build a lot of neat things out of Lincoln Logs,but PopPop ain't one of 'em. 用林肯积木可以搭出很多有意思的东西但是搭不出外公

And now you're here asking me for something to save you. 你现在竟然敢向我提出要求要我救你

Well, sorry, Mr. Kringle,but today's not your day. 抱歉了，圣诞老人先生今天不能让你如愿了

I'm leaving you here to rot, and I hope the ogres feast on your bones. 我要让你死在这里希望食人魔把你吃到尸骨无存

I take the skeleton key,and I toss it into the chasm,and on the way out, I give Santa a swift kick in his bowl full of jelly! 我拿起万能钥匙扔进峡谷里离开之前我给了圣诞老人的肥果冻肚皮闪电一踹（bowl full of jelly 装满果冻的碗是圣诞歌的歌词形容圣诞老人的肚子）

Okay.So Wolowitz and Stuart are paralyzed, Santa's dead,and I picked this over having sex with my girlfriend. 好吧。沃罗威茨和斯图尔特被麻痹了圣诞老人死了而我居然不和女友上床跑来玩这个

Santa? Oh, hello, Sheldon.You should be asleep. 圣诞老人？你好，谢尔顿。你应该在睡觉啊

Well, then, you shouldn't have jingle bells on your boots. 那你就别在靴子上挂铃铛吵人睡觉啊

I've been wanting to talk to you. 我想跟你聊聊

I'm sorry I disappointed you when you were a little boy. 抱歉在你小时候  我让你失望了

II can do a lot of magical things,but unfortunately bringing your PopPop back isn't one of them. 我能施展魔法做到不少事但遗憾的是我没有能力让你的外公死而复生

I understand.But II do have something special for you.Close your eyes. 我明白。但我有特别的礼物送给你。闭上眼

Oh, I hope it's a train.Oh, it's better than a train.Two trains?Better. 希望是火车。比火车要好。两辆火车吗？更好

I'm getting three trains.Okay, open 'em. 我要有三辆火车啦。好了，睁眼吧。

This is for leaving me in the dungeon to be eaten alive by ogres! 这是回敬你把我留在地牢让食人魔给生吞活剥了

Wait, uh, uh, hang on.IIn my defense...Ho, ho, ho, ya big dork! 等等，别激动容我解释下。呵呵呵，你个大傻帽！