PBS高端访谈:如何教育孩子?（在线收听）

WILLIAM BRANGHAM: Parents often struggle what the right way to set limits for their kids. How much TV is OK? How about online video games? How late can they stay out with their friends? It can also be tough to know how to answer the children's pointed questions about the world. Tonight, also part of our Canvas series, author Karen Russell shares her Humble Opinion my children need to hear the truth.

威廉·布兰汉姆：父母总是苦恼于不知道怎样为孩子设定限制才是正确的。看多少电视是可以的？玩儿多久电子游戏是可以的？晚上最晚跟朋友玩儿到多晚？还有一件事也会很艰难——如果你的孩子们向你提出尖锐的问题，你要如何回答。今晚是我们帆布系列报道的内容。在今晚的节目中，作家凯伦·罗舒将分享她对于聆听真理的看法。

KAREN RUSSELL, Author, Orange World and Other Stories: The first morning I took my 2-year-old to day care, I arrived with a box of carefully labeled blankets and extra clothes, enough diapers, I felt, to last him until college. I was so anxious, I almost didn't notice the older man lying on the snowy ground beside us. Shards of glass haloed his bare head. My son looked up to me, the satellite tower, waiting to receive my signal. What did I make of this grandfather sleeping in rags on concrete? Was this normal? Was I concerned? Should he be? How do we tell the story of suffering to our children?

凯伦·罗舒，《橘色世界故事集》作者：我把2岁的孩子送到托儿所的第一天，我带去了一箱子带有标签的毯子和衣服、许多尿不湿，我感觉这些已经够他用到大学的了。我当时很紧张，所以差点没注意到躺在身后皑皑白雪上的那位老人。他光秃的脑袋上有玻璃碎片。我儿子抬头看向我，仿佛我就是他的指示明灯，他等着接收我的信号。我当时是怎样理解这样一位衣衫褴褛、直接躺在水泥地上的老人的呢？这种现象正常吗？我有漠不关心吗？他应该沦落至此吗？我们要怎样向孩子表明人间疾苦的存在呢？

Some people might advise, don't say a word, lady. It's way too early. A parenting Web site told me to shift the focus from the stranger's pain to my son's security. First and foremost, you must reassure your child that they are safe. That reassurance is getting harder to give in Oregon, where homelessness is on the rise and the Department of Education reported a record number of homeless students. I understand the impulse to reassure our kids that nothing is wrong, to say, it's very sad that some people don't have homes, but you are safe. This is a ghost town of a sentence. Who is the subject? Even the feeling of sadness is floating there unclaimed. Children hear the passive voice. Unless we give ourselves an active role to play in these unfolding crises, kids will absorb our quiet acceptance of the status quo. They won't know that we can be agents for change, or even that change is possible. When I was growing up, my parents drove my friends and I to volunteer at a shelter five minutes by car and worlds removed from our Miami home. I can't recall a word they said to me now, but I do remember my father sharing a cigarette and laughing with a homeless veteran. I remember my mom helping another woman with her groceries. My parents reassured me that I wasn't crazy to feel disturbed that there were kids my age who had no permanent home. Something was wrong. But there was also something to be done. The world our children inherit is deeply unjust. And they know it. We need to show them that we have the power to revise it. Somewhere tonight, a mother is explaining to her children why they have to leave their home for a shelter, why they are sleeping in their car, why they no longer have a bed to dream on. She doesn't have the luxury of curating her words or shielding them from the most painful truths. I wonder how she is answering their questions.

有些人可能会建议说：女士，请一个字都不要对孩子讲。因为现在讲还为时过早。我从一个育儿的网站上看到：不要关注陌生人所遭受的苦痛，而是要注重自己儿子的安全。首先，你要确保你的孩子是安全的。现在的俄勒冈州越来越难确保儿童的安全了，因为现在无家可归的人越来越多。从教育部的报告中，我们看到无家可归的学生人数已经达到了史上新高。我明白，我们确实有迫切需要，要让我们的孩子明白不是谁做错了，要告诉孩子虽然有人无家可归是很悲伤的事情，但你安全就行了。这句话极其可怕，谁是主语呢？甚至没有任何人为此感到悲伤。孩子们听到的都是被动语态。在这场四处蔓延的危机中，如果我们无法发挥积极的作用，孩子们就会沿袭我们对现状的接受。孩子们就永远不会知道我们可以引发改变，甚至不知道改变是有可能实现的。我还是孩子的时候，我的父母会驱车带着我和我的朋友们去避难所做志愿者。虽然避难所只需5分钟的车程就能到了，但那里的世界和我们在迈阿密的家有着天壤之别。我记不得当时他们对我说了什么了，但我确实记得我的父亲把烟分给那里的人一起抽，还跟无家可归的老兵一起欢声笑语。我记得我的妈妈帮助另一位女性收拾杂货。我的父母曾向我保证——我有许多同龄人无家可归，如果我为此感到难过，这是人之常情。虽然有些地方不够完美，但我们总有力所能及的事。我们的孩子将来所生活的世界会是极度不公平的，而他们也深知这一点。我们要向他们表明我们有能力改变现状。今晚，某个地方会有一位母亲向她的孩子解释为什么他们要离开家园寻找避难所、为什么他们只能睡在车里、为什么他们不能睡在床上做香甜的美梦。很不幸，这位母亲无法矫饰辞藻，无法保护自己的孩子不触碰到令人心痛的现实。我想知道这位母亲会怎样回答孩子们的问题。