PBS高端访谈:陈词滥调真的没用吗?（在线收听）

JUDY WOODRUFF: As we have seen, COVID-19 is taking a heavy toll, and many are not able to say goodbye to their loved ones. It leaves some of us unsure we can find the right words for those who are grieving. Throughout life, we are told to avoid cliches, but writer Rion Amilcar Scott shares his Humble Opinion on the one place the cliche will do.

RION AMILCAR SCOTT, Author, The World Doesn't Require You: On the day before she died, the last time I saw my mother lucid, for no good reason, I neglected to kiss her goodbye when I left the hospital for the night. And that's how I missed the final opportunity to kiss the cheek of my still living and conscious mother. This is one of the many sadnesses that frequently swarm my grieving mind, things I would rather not think about. Likewise, I'd rather not think of things to tell my mother next time we talk, only to remember there won't be a next time. But, hey, all mothers die. She's supposed to go and leave me here with only memories. It's the proper way of things. In the presence of the grieving, some people choose to say nothing. Ashamedly, I have done it myself, even after knowing better. But I have learned now the one good use for cliches. They somehow find power as a balm to spread over the pain. Look, as a writer, all my training has taught me to be allergic to cliches. If I were to somehow write that my mother's death caused me to cry my eyes out, in revision, I would perhaps replace that stock phrase with a description of words lost in the crack of a voice trying to stifle back tears. Death, in all its devastating finality, though, won't wait for a revision. Death won't wait for you to dig through your soul in search of a blazing truth that will put a grieving spirit in order. I'm not convinced such a sequence of words even exists. When someone dies, look the grieving in their eye and say, My condolences, or, I'm sorry for your loss. Say it sincerely and with meaning. When those words were said to me in the days after my mother's passing, it said: I see you and I see your grief. There may not be a blinding truth within you about anyone's loss, but there are small sparkles of light. The power your cliches have in the face of death's enormity is their acknowledgment that there is nothing to say, no words, as that particular cliche goes, but still something needs to be said to recognize both the devastation and the humanity of the griever. Those well-worn words are a small offering, perhaps, but they will suffice.

JUDY WOODRUFF: Rion Amilcar Scott, we thank you.

朱迪·伍德拉夫：正如我们所看到的，新冠病毒让我们付出了沉重代价，许多人无法与他们所爱的人道别。我们不知道该用什么话来安慰那些正在悲痛中的人。在我们的一生中，我们被告知要避免陈词滥调，但作家里昂·阿米尔卡尔·斯科特在“浅见”栏目中分享了陈词滥调的作用。

里昂·阿米尔卡尔·斯科特，作家，《这个世界不需要你》：在她去世的前一天，上一次我看到我母亲神志清醒时，没有合理的理由，晚上离开医院时没有和她吻别。我也因此错过了母亲清醒时亲吻她脸颊的机会。这种悲伤的情绪总会缠绕在我的心头，我宁愿不去想。同样，我也不想下次谈话时和我妈妈说什么，而只记得不会再有下一次了。但是，嘿，所有母亲都会死，她应该只给我留下一些回忆，事情就应该这样。面对悲痛，一些人选择什么都不说，让人羞愧的是，我也是什么都没说，即使我了解得更多。但我现在了解了陈词滥调的一点好处，陈词滥调有抚平你悲痛的能量。听着，作为一个作家，我所有的训练都教会我反对陈词滥调。如果我要写“我母亲的死让我痛哭不已”，改动一下，我或许会把“痛哭不已”替换成一句话，这句话却淹没在了难掩泪水的悲痛中。死亡不会等待修正，因其结果都是毁灭性的。死亡不会等待你去挖掘你的灵魂，去寻找一个炽热的真理，让一个悲伤的灵魂恢复正常。我不相信这样一系列的词真的存在，当有人死了，看着他们悲伤的眼睛说，我们表示悲痛，或者说节哀顺变，要说地真诚，说地富有深意。在我母亲去世后的日子里，有人对我说：我看见你，我看见你的悲伤。在你的心里，关于去世你或许没有什么概念，但却有微弱的光芒。面对死亡的影响，陈词滥调的作用就是让他们承认没什么可说的，正如那句老生常谈所说的，没什么可说的，但还需要说些什么来体会悲痛者的痛苦和人性。这些老生常谈的话也许只是一个小小的提议，但它们就足够了。

朱迪·伍德拉夫：里昂·阿米尔卡尔·斯科特，谢谢。