Unit 63
The concept of EQ
We have been conditioned to believe that IQ is the best measure of human potential. In the past 10 years, however, researchers have found that this isn't necessarily the case -- that in fact, your emotional intelligence quotient (EQ) might be a greater predictor of success. We learned to feel before we learned to think. The strong physical reactions we have when we feel anger, happiness, love, surprise, disgust and sadness, for example, illustrate the idea that emotions went before intelligence.
IQ is essential for learning and mental development. EQ is a person's ability to understand his or her own emotions and the emotions of others and to act appropriately based on this understanding, and it is more important for happiness and success. We have all known people who did not complete college, but who have become very successful in business. We call them street smart. We also know people who, on the whole, are positive, communicative, pleasant and supportive -- these people enjoy a high level of EQ.
The vast majority of one's ultimate success in society is determined by non-IQ factors, ranging from social class to luck. Emotional intelligence is one of those factors. The good thing about EQ is that it can always, at any age, be improved, unlike IQ, which remains more or less fixed in adult life. It's important to --
Know one's own emotions. Recognize and name emotions you feel; understand why you feel that way; and distinguish between feeling and actions.
Motivate oneself. When considering how to harness your feelings, practice some emotional self-control and delay gratification. Stanford University researchers tested children's impulse control by placing a banana in front of them and telling them that they would receive a second one if the first remained when the researcher, who needed to leave the room, returned later. The follow-up study found that, overall, the children who delayed gratification and did not eat the banana were more successful later in life -- as measured by a range of factors including happiness, income and job satisfaction -- than those children who ate the banana immediately.
Recognize emotions in others. The ability to take another person's perspective is a skill that effective managers possess. Emotionally intelligent individuals also are sensitive to other people's feeling and listen well.
Manage emotions. Accept your feelings, but find a balance between over sensitivity or over expression and emotional suppression.
Handle relationships. Applying conflict management skills instead of ignoring conflict, and being considerate and cooperative are part of handling relationships from an emotionally intelligent perspective. Communication skills are essential to healthy relationships. |