171. The platitudinous priest老调重弹的牧师 pioneer-platitudinous
There was a priest who, because of his plainspoken sermons, was considered pioneering in his field. When he gave his sermons, he would use plain language to avoid platitude and pique the interest of the congregation.
Of course any pious pioneer is going to have his antagonist, and the priest was no exception. One Sunday morning, after passing around the collection plate, the priest was giving his sermon, “and God cursed the heathens with a plague” He had already reached a plateau, and as he was approaching the pivotal point, one of the men, who had been squirming and pivoting in his pew, suddenly stoop up and yelled, “Plagiarism! Plagiarism!” The congregation began to grumble. The priest, trying to placate the congregation, said to the man, “Sir, if I have spoken any platitudinous remarks,” As the priest spoke and gestured, he inadvertently knocked over a wine pitcher next to the platform, which in turn fell into the orchestra pit and struck a boy soprano, who let out a high-pitched, ear-splitting shrill. The rafters at the top of the church shook, a platelike piece of plaster followed by a plank fell and struck the antagonistic man.
As the man was lying in the ambulance with a bottle of plasma connected to his arm, a policeman said, “Who is the plaintiff here?” “I am,” said the man. “And who is the accused?” asked the policeman. “I am,” said the priest. The priest mumbled to himself, “It would have been better if I had been struck by the plague.”
The priest is now serving time at a penal plantation.
pioneer n.开拓者,先驱,倡导者v.开辟,倡导
pioneering adj.开创性的
pious adj.(对宗教)虔诚的
pique vt.激起(好奇等),激怒
pit n. 坑,地坑,煤矿vt.使对抗,使相斗
pitch n.音高
pitcher n.大水罐,水壶
pivot n.枢轴,支点,(讨论的)中心点,重点
pivotal adj.枢轴的,关键的
placate v.安抚,平息愤怒
plagiarism n.剽窃,抄袭
plague n.瘟疫,灾祸vt.折磨,使苦恼
plain n.平原,草原adj.简单的,朴素的
plainspoken adj.直言不讳的
plaintiff n.原告
plank n.厚木板
plantation n.种植园
plasma n.血浆
plaster n. 灰泥,石膏vt.抹泥,涂
plate n.盘子,版图,大片平面,金银餐具
plateau n.高原
platelike adj.层状的
platform n.(车站)月台,平台
platitude n.陈词滥调
platitudinous adj.陈词滥调的,陈腐的 |