How Can You Be 'Beside Yourself?'

 

Hello and welcome to another episode¹ of Words and Their Stories.

On this show we explain common expressions in American English – where they come from and how to use them.

Today we talk about being overcome with emotion, both good and bad. We have a somewhat strange expression you can use to describe that situation: “to be beside yourself.”

So, if I say I am beside myself with joy, I am filled with joy! However, I can also be beside myself with grief², anger, or most other emotions.

You can use this expression to talk about others, too. Just change the reflexive pronoun. For example, a woman who gives birth can be beside herself with awe³ and probably exhaustion⁴. The new father can be beside himself with awe too.

The expression is useful and simple, but strange. It sounds as if someone has become two people. How can you be next to yourself? Being “beside yourself” is technically⁵ impossible.

Some word experts say the expression may come from a belief about magical powers of the soul, or spirit. To some, experiencing extreme emotion — whether good or bad — can make people’s souls leave their bodies. In other words, if a person is under great emotional stress, the soul and body could actually separate and stand beside each other.

Now, let’s talk about usage⁶. In American English, you can simply say “I’m beside myself” to mean you are shocked or very upset. For example, if you have a bad fight with a close friend, you might be beside yourself. You might scream, write your friend an angry letter, or just go somewhere by yourself and cry.

Here’s another situation. A high school student applies to several colleges. If they all reject her application, she could be beside herself.

She might stay up all night worrying about what to do next.

Here is another example. If a person becomes seriously ill, he could start talking in a way that does not make any sense. The patient may also start behaving strangely, walking around the room -- back and forth⁷, back and forth. He may think he is seeing someone who is not really there. A doctor might say, “He is delirious⁸ with fever. He is beside himself.”

We have another expression that is very similar to “being beside yourself.” We can also be out of our minds. We use this expression in the same way we use “beside oneself.”

So we can be out of minds with fear, with love, with happiness, or with any other emotion. And just like “beside oneself,” we also use this expression on its own without a specific emotion.

So, if someone says or does something crazy -- like learning how to ride a motorcycle on a dark, rainy night -- you can simply say, “She is out of her mind!”

In that example, you could also say the person is crazy or has lost it (as in their mind).

And that’s all the time we have today. But if you join us next week, for another Words and Their Stories, we will be beside ourselves with happiness.

I’m Anna Matteo.

Words in This Story

awe – n. a strong feeling of fear or respect and also wonder

magical – adj. very pleasant or exciting

delirious – adj. not able to think or speak clearly especially because of fever or other illness

1 episode   

n.（作品的一段）情节，插曲，系列事件中之一

参考例句：

• The episode was a huge embarrassment for all concerned.这段小插曲令所有有关人员都感到非常尴尬。
• This episode remains sharply engraved on my mind.这段经历至今仍深深地铭刻在我的心中。

2 grief   

n.悲伤，悲痛，悲伤的事，悲痛的缘由

参考例句：

• Don't allow yourself to sink into grief,it can do no good.不要使自己陷入悲哀之中，这样一点好处也没有。
• After her mother died,she abandoned herself to grief.母亲死后，她沉浸于悲痛之中。

3 awe   

n.敬畏，惊惧；vt.使敬畏，使惊惧

参考例句：

• The sight filled us with awe.这景色使我们大为惊叹。
• The approaching tornado struck awe in our hearts.正在逼近的龙卷风使我们惊恐万分。

4 exhaustion   

n.耗尽枯竭，疲惫，筋疲力尽，竭尽，详尽无遗的论述

参考例句：

• She slept the sleep of exhaustion.她因疲劳而酣睡。
• His exhaustion was obvious when he fell asleep standing.他站着睡着了，显然是太累了。

5 technically   

adv.专门地，技术上地

参考例句：

• Technically it is the most advanced equipment ever.从技术上说，这是最先进的设备。
• The tomato is technically a fruit,although it is eaten as a vegetable.严格地说，西红柿是一种水果，尽管它是当作蔬菜吃的。

6 usage   

n.惯用法，使用，用法

参考例句：

• I am clear about the usage of this word at last.这个词的用法我算是弄明白了。
• The usage is now firmly established.这种用法现已得到确认。

7 forth   

adv.向前；向外，往外

参考例句：

• The wind moved the trees gently back and forth.风吹得树轻轻地来回摇晃。
• He gave forth a series of works in rapid succession.他很快连续发表了一系列的作品。

8 delirious   

adj.不省人事的，神智昏迷的

参考例句：

• He was delirious,murmuring about that matter.他精神恍惚，低声叨念着那件事。
• She knew that he had become delirious,and tried to pacify him.她知道他已经神志昏迷起来了，极力想使他镇静下来。