My daughter Judy, who works for a plumbing company, found herself in need of a plumber at home. When she got to work, she asked that a plumber be sent. For several days her request was ignored. In des...
Reading water meters in an unfamiliar part of town, I came upon a house with no number. Then I noticed an elderly man gardening at the first house on that block. "Excuse me," I said to him. "Are you N...
It was rush hour and I was dashing to a train in New York City's Grand Central Terminal - As I neared the gate, a plump, middle-aged woman sprinted up from behind, lost her footing on the smooth marbl...
Vacationing in Hawaii, my husband and I went out to dinner one night at one of its finest restaurants - When presented with the check, my husband reached into his pocket for his wallet, but somehow lo...
A man walked into a doctor's examining room. "Put out your tongue," the doctor said. The man put out his tongue and the doctor said. "0. K. You can put your tongue back now. " the doctor said. "it's c...
Vacationing on the island of Oahu, we were waiting in our tour bus for some stragglers to show up. A man, obviously not with our group, approached the bus and was about to board. How would our driver...
"Are we poisonous?" the young snake asked his mother. "Yes, dear," she replied - "Why do you ask?" "Cause I've just bitten my tongue! " Notes: (1) poisonous adj.有毒的 (2) Cause I've just bitten my...
A man was at the doctor's office. "Every time I drink a cup of coffee, Doctor, I have a stabbing pain in my right eye. What should I do?" he asked . "Take the spoon out of your cup. " answered the doc...
A penny-pinching farmer didn't want his hired hand to stop working. One morning, he told the farmhand, "It's such a nuisance to come in from the field,, wash up for lunch and take time to eat. Why don...
My sister, a primary school teacher, was informed by one of her pupils that a bird had built its nest in the tree outside the classroom. "What kind of bird?" my sister asked. "I didn't see the bird, m...
A bar owner locked up his place at 2 a. m. and went home to sleep. He had been in bed only a few minutes when the phone rang." What time do you open up in the morning ?" he heard an obviously inebriat...
To prevent our dog, Lacy, from pestering visitors to our house, my mother often massaged her as she lounged beneath the kitchen table, her favorite resting spot. One day a contractor came over to talk...
As a band instructor at an elementary school, I require my students to turn in practice sheets signed by their parents so I can be sure they are putting in enough time. I had to laugh, however, when o...
A dog owner claimed that his pet, when given money, would go to the news stall to buy a paper. His friend insisted on a demonstration and handed the dog some money - The dog trotted off, but an hour l...
A friend of mine had been wanting new kitchen cabinets for a long time, but her husband insisted they were an extravagance. She went to visit her mother for two weeks, and when she returned, she was o...
