你的雅思作文句子有效吗

 　　句子结构是雅思写作评分标准“语法的多样性与准确度”中一项十分重要的考量因素，但这并不意味着要求考生具备写长难句的能力。在追求输出像雅思阅读一样精到的语言之前，我们首先要确保的应当是写出来的句子是正确的。有效的句子甚而段落通常应当同时满足以下五个要素：一致、连贯、简洁、强调、多样。

　　1. 一致：如句内的逻辑关系，注意检查是否存在简单推论、逻辑残缺、逻辑悖论、依赖偏见等。

　　Born in a small town in South Chinain the early 1950s, he grew up to be a famous musician.

　　→ He was born in a small town in South China in the early 1950s. In his childhood he liked to sing songs. Later he entered a conservatory¹. In the 1970s he became a famous musician.

　　2. 连贯：这个问题在平行结构、共用主语、使用指代的情况下尤其需要注意。

　　We thought she was charming², intelligent, and a very capable³ young woman.

　　→ We thought she was charming, intelligent, and very capable.

　　Or: We thought she was a charming, intelligent, and very capable young woman.

　　He was knocked down by a bicycle, but it was not serious.

　　→ He was knocked down by a bicycle, but was not badly injured⁴.

　　Looking out of the window, the grassland⁵ stretches as far as the eye can reach.

　　→ Looking out of the window, we can see the grassland stretching as far as the eye can reach.

　　Or: Outside the window, the grassland stretches as far as the eye can reach.

　　He gave a reason for not attending the meeting, which nobody believed.

　　→ He gave a reason, which nobody believed, for not attending the meeting.

　　Or: He gave a reason for not attending the meeting, a reason which nobody believed.

　　3. 简洁：英美文化推崇坦率和直接，通常不需要体现咱儒家文化的含蓄和委婉。

　　It was small in size and blue in colour.

　　→ It was small and blue.

　　He usually likes to drink all kinds of wines that are produced in France.

　　→ He prefers French wines.

　　4. 强调：正如每篇文章都要有中心思想(main idea)，每个段落都要有主题句(topic sentence)一般，每个句子都要围绕一个中心观点清晰地呈现出作者想要表现的重点。

　　He is modest and hardworking and is a good student.

　　→ He is a good student, modest and hardworking.

　　There is a big tree, which is said to be 300 years old, in the temple.

　　→ In the temple there is a big tree, which is said to be 300 years old.

　　At the sight of the disorderly crowd, he was aware that something bad would be possible.

　　→ The moment he saw the disorderly crowd, he knew that something bad would happen.

　　5. 多样：中文重重复，英文重替代，中英差异使然。

1 conservatory   

n.温室，音乐学院；adj.保存性的，有保存力的

参考例句：

• At the conservatory,he learned how to score a musical composition.在音乐学校里，他学会了怎样谱曲。
• The modern conservatory is not an environment for nurturing plants.这个现代化温室的环境不适合培育植物。

2 charming   

adj.迷人的，可爱的

参考例句：

• She looked small and gentle and altogether charming.她看起来小巧文雅,十分迷人。
• She has charming manners.她具有媚人的风姿。

3 capable   

adj.有能力的，有才能的

参考例句：

• The new woman secretary was extremely clever and capable.这位新来的女秘书很是精明强干。
• Jim is capable at sports.吉姆擅长运动。

4 injured   

adj.受伤的

参考例句：

• Our best defender is injured and won't be able to play today.我们最佳的防守员受伤了，今天不能参加比赛。
• The injured men have been dug out of the snow.受伤人员从雪中被挖了出来。

5 grassland   

n.牧场，草地，草原

参考例句：

• There is a reach of grassland in the distance.远处是连绵一片的草原。
• The snowstorm swept the vast expanse of grassland.暴风雪袭击了辽阔的草原。