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Kids, Before the Age of TV There Was a Funny Thing Called a Radio Show
Laughs from yesteryear with performances by Abbott and Costello, Jack1 Benny, Fred Allen and Bob Hope. Transcript2 of radio broadcast:
14 January 2008
 

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VOICE ONE:

Welcome to THIS IS AMERICA in VOA Special English. I'm Steve Ember.

VOICE TWO:

And I'm Shirley Griffith. This week on our program, we bring you some laughs from old-time American radio shows.

 
Bud Abbott, left, and Lou Costello
LOU COSTELLO: "What I want to find out."
BUD ABBOTT:  "I say Who’s on first, What’s on second, I Don’t Know’s on third."

VOICE ONE:

Bud Abbott and Lou Costello were two of America's funniest funnymen. Abbott and Costello appeared in theater, movies and television. But they owed much of their fame to radio, and a routine called "Who's On First?"

VOICE TWO:

Abbott plays a manager of a baseball team. Costello has trouble understanding that the players have funny nicknames, like Who.

COSTELLO: "You gonna be the coach, too?"
ABBOTT: "Yes."
COSTELLO: "And you don't know the fellows' names?"
ABBOTT: " Well, I should."
COSTELLO: "Well, then, who's on first?"
ABBOTT: "Yes."
COSTELLO: "I mean the fellow's name."
ABBOTT: "Who."
COSTELLO: "The guy on first."
ABBOTT: "Who."
COSTELLO: "The first baseman."
ABBOTT: "Who."
COSTELLO: "The first baseman."
ABBOTT: "Who."
ABBOTT: "Who is on first!"
COSTELLO: "I'm asking you who's on first."
ABBOTT: "That's the man's name."
COSTELLO: "That's who's name?"
ABBOTT: "Yes."
COSTELLO: "Well, go ahead and tell me."
ABBOTT: “That’s it.‿BR>COSTELLO: “That’s who?‿BR>ABBOTT: “Yes.‿/P>

VOICE ONE:

 
Fred Allen
Another of America's great comedians4 was Fred Allen. As early as nineteen thirty-six, he had a weekly radio audience of about twenty million people. So says the Museum of Broadcast Communications in Chicago.

For almost twenty years, in the nineteen thirties and forties, Fred Allen had a radio show called "Allen's Alley5." His career also included television and Broadway shows. Like many performers of his time, he started in vaudeville6 in the early nineteen hundreds. Vaudeville shows presented all kinds of entertainment.

He began as a juggler7, someone who can keep several objects in the air at the same time. But he was presented as the "World's Worst Juggler."

VOICE TWO:

After that he performed as a comedian3. Vaudeville comedy acts usually contained a series of disconnected jokes. But during the Great Depression, Fred Allen had the idea of creating a series of complete stories and situations.

Every week, on the radio, he would visit an imaginary place, "Allen's Alley," where he would talk with characters like Senator Claghorn. Senator Claghorn was a politician who talked a lot but never said anything.

But some of Fred Allen's funniest programs were about his supposed longtime dispute with another radio star, Jack Benny.

VOICE ONE:

 
Jack Benny
As a young man, Jack Benny played violin in a vaudeville theater in his home state of Illinois. When the United States entered World War One, he joined the Navy.

He played his violin for other sailors. But the sailors liked his jokes better than his music. So Jack Benny decided8 to become a comedian.

In the early nineteen thirties Jack Benny got his own radio show. It lasted for twenty-three years.

VOICE TWO:

Listeners loved it when Jack Benny and Fred Allen would say bad things about each other on their shows.    

But two comedians could still be friends -- or at least friendly enough to perform together. In nineteen fifty, on Jack Benny's radio program, they did a skit9 about an early visit to their talent agent.

VOICE ONE:

They are partners in a vaudeville act that they think is wonderful. They hope the agent will get them an appearance in a good theater. But first they have to get past his secretary. 

SECRETARY: "Now, uh, what is the name of your act again?"
ALLEN: "Allen and Benny."
SECRETARY: "I thought you said it was Benny and Allen."
ALLEN: " Well, at two o'clock, our billing changes."
SECRETARY: "Well, what kind of an act do you do?"
BENNY: "Violin, clarinet and snappy patter."
SECRETARY: "And where have you played?'
BENNY: "Oh, all over."
SECRETARY: " Well, where?"
ALLEN: "Well, just -- just tell her the important dates, Jack."
SECRETARY: "Yeah, go ahead."
BENNY: "Well, we did a week in Sow Belly10, Wyoming. A week in Loose Tooth, Arizona. Three days in Stagnant11 Water, New Mexico. And we also played the Palace here in New York."
SECRETARY: "Sow Belly, Loose Tooth, Stagnant Water and the Palace! Well, at least you worked your way up."
ALLEN: "No, we played the Palace first."

VOICE TWO:

Finally they see the agent, Mickey Rockford, and appeal to him for a break -- a chance to become stars. But he is not interested. Still, they get him to listen to their act. They remind him that he booked them once before. 

BENNY: "Mister Rockford, I’m Jack Benny. This is Fred Allen.‿BR>ALLEN: "That's right, Mister Rockford. Remember? You booked our act seven years ago."
ROCKFORD: "Oh yes, what business are you in now?"
ALLEN: "Well, we are still in show business."
BENNY: "Yes, and we thought you could book us."
ROCKFORD: "Please, fellows."
ALLEN: "Our new act is sensational12. At least give us a chance, Mister Rockford."
BENNY: " Yes, all we need is one good break, you know."
ROCKFORD: "I gave you a break when I put you in Loew's Flatbush."
ALLEN: "Some break. They opened it with Fink's Mules13, and Major Doughty's dogs came out, then Manny's Monkeys, then Powers' Dancing Elephants."
ROCKFORD: "So what?"
ALLEN: "By the time we came out, we looked like the last two passengers on Noah's Ark."

BENNY: "Mister Rockford, how about listening to our, our new act?"
ROCKFORD: "Oh, all right, if you insist."
BENNY: "Ready? Ready with your clarinet, Fred?"
ALLEN: "Ready."
BENNY: "Okay. One, two. Atta boy, Fred. Oh, Mister Allen ‿
ALLEN: "What is it, Mister Benny?"
BENNY: "Oh, Mister Allen, have you heard that they're making women's bathing suits out of spun14 glass?"
ALLEN: "Women's bathing suits out of glass? Well, that is worth looking into."
BENNY: "I'll take it, Mister Allen."
ALLEN: "If you will. [Benny plays the violin.] Uhhhhh. You know, Mister Benny, I ‿
BENNY: " Yes, Mister Allen? Oh, pardon me."
ALLEN: "I love music."
BENNY: "So do I.  Music once saved my uncle's life."
ALLEN: "How did music save your uncle's life?"
BENNY: "They played the Star Spangled Banner just as he was sitting in the electric chair. Take it, Mister Allen."
ALLEN: "[Music] I'm interpolating."
BENNY: "You don't have to finish it, you know."
ALLEN: "Oh, Mister Benny."
BENNY: "Yes, Mister Allen?"
ALLEN: "I want you to meet my new girl. Her name is Well Enough."
BENNY: "Why do you call your girl Well Enough?"
ALLEN: "Because I want the boys to leave Well Enough alone. How about the finale, mister ...?"
BENNY: "In unison15? [Music] Well, Mister Rockford, what did you think of us?"
ALLEN: "Wait until he gets his head out of the drawer."

VOICE ONE:

 
Bob Hope
At the same time Fred Allen and Jack Benny were making America laugh, so was Bob Hope. Hope entertained people all over the world for seventy years.

In nineteen thirty-seven, Bob Hope began a series of radio programs called the "Woodbury Soap Show." The next year, he started a radio show for the company that made Pepsodent toothpaste. His Tuesday night radio show soon became popular. Bob Hope continued doing radio shows for almost twenty years.

His success in radio led to a long-term relationship with Paramount16 Pictures, a major film company. The actors in his movies were also the characters on his radio shows.

VOICE TWO:

For fifty years, Bob Hope entertained members of America's armed forces. He took his radio show to military bases from the South Pacific to Greenland. 

One time, after World War Two ended, he brought his radio show to soldiers waiting at a base in California to return to civilian17 life. 

BOB HOPE: "And one Air Force colonel got out and bought a farm. Yeah, he'd been in action so long, every morning before the chickens started laying eggs he called them into the chicken coop and briefed them.

"I knew these boys, I knew these boys, would be glad to see me here today. I said, 'Look fellows, here's the kind of clothes you'd be wearing when you get out,' and fifty guys re-enlisted. I saw some of these fellows shopping for clothes in Hollywood. They are so used to getting stuff from the supply sergeant18 that the clerk had to throw the suits on the floor before these guys would try them on.

"One soldier had been fighting in the jungles for years. And I don't know if it had affected19 him or not, but when the clerk handed him a tweed suit to try on he spent three hours searching through the fuzz for snipers."

VOICE ONE:

Bob Hope came to the United States as a child from England with his family. As a young performer, he had a song and dance act with partners for a while. But then he began to perform by himself. He sang and danced well. He also kept people laughing with his jokes which he told very fast.

In the nineteen thirties, in New York, he appeared in Broadway shows. Success on Broadway brought him a part in the movie "The Big Broadcast of 1938."

VOICE TWO:

In that film, he sang a song with Shirley Ross called "Thanks for the Memory." It became his theme song -- the song people think of when they think of Bob Hope.

VOICE ONE:

Our program was written by Jerilyn Watson and produced by Caty Weaver20. I'm Steve Ember.

VOICE TWO: 

And I'm Shirley Griffith. Archives of programs with transcripts21 and MP3s are at voaspecialenglish.com. Join us again next week for THIS IS AMERICA in VOA Special English.

 


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点击收听单词发音收听单词发音  

1 jack 53Hxp     
n.插座,千斤顶,男人;v.抬起,提醒,扛举;n.(Jake)杰克
参考例句:
  • I am looking for the headphone jack.我正在找寻头戴式耳机插孔。
  • He lifted the car with a jack to change the flat tyre.他用千斤顶把车顶起来换下瘪轮胎。
2 transcript JgpzUp     
n.抄本,誊本,副本,肄业证书
参考例句:
  • A transcript of the tapes was presented as evidence in court.一份录音带的文字本作为证据被呈交法庭。
  • They wouldn't let me have a transcript of the interview.他们拒绝给我一份采访的文字整理稿。
3 comedian jWfyW     
n.喜剧演员;滑稽演员
参考例句:
  • The comedian tickled the crowd with his jokes.喜剧演员的笑话把人们逗乐了。
  • The comedian enjoyed great popularity during the 30's.那位喜剧演员在三十年代非常走红。
4 comedians efcac24154f4452751c4385767145187     
n.喜剧演员,丑角( comedian的名词复数 )
参考例句:
  • The voice was rich, lordly, Harvardish, like all the boring radio comedians'imitations. 声音浑厚、威严,俨然是哈佛出身的气派,就跟无线电里所有的滑稽演员叫人已经听腻的模仿完全一样。 来自辞典例句
  • He distracted them by joking and imitating movie and radio comedians. 他用开玩笑的方法或者模仿电影及广播中的滑稽演员来对付他们。 来自辞典例句
5 alley Cx2zK     
n.小巷,胡同;小径,小路
参考例句:
  • We live in the same alley.我们住在同一条小巷里。
  • The blind alley ended in a brick wall.这条死胡同的尽头是砖墙。
6 vaudeville Oizw4     
n.歌舞杂耍表演
参考例句:
  • The standard length of a vaudeville act was 12 minutes.一个杂耍节目的标准长度是12分钟。
  • The mayor talk like a vaudeville comedian in his public address.在公共演讲中,这位市长讲起话来像个歌舞杂耍演员。
7 juggler juggler     
n. 变戏法者, 行骗者
参考例句:
  • Dick was a juggler, who threw mists before your eyes. 迪克是个骗子,他在你面前故弄玄虚。
  • The juggler juggled three bottles. 这个玩杂耍的人可同时抛接3个瓶子。
8 decided lvqzZd     
adj.决定了的,坚决的;明显的,明确的
参考例句:
  • This gave them a decided advantage over their opponents.这使他们比对手具有明显的优势。
  • There is a decided difference between British and Chinese way of greeting.英国人和中国人打招呼的方式有很明显的区别。
9 skit 8hEy1     
n.滑稽短剧;一群
参考例句:
  • The comic skIt sent up the foolishness of young men in love.那幅画把沉溺于热恋中的青年男子的痴态勾勒得滑稽可笑。
  • They performed a skit to amuse the crowd.他们表演了一个幽默小品来娱乐观众。
10 belly QyKzLi     
n.肚子,腹部;(像肚子一样)鼓起的部分,膛
参考例句:
  • The boss has a large belly.老板大腹便便。
  • His eyes are bigger than his belly.他眼馋肚饱。
11 stagnant iGgzj     
adj.不流动的,停滞的,不景气的
参考例句:
  • Due to low investment,industrial output has remained stagnant.由于投资少,工业生产一直停滞不前。
  • Their national economy is stagnant.他们的国家经济停滞不前。
12 sensational Szrwi     
adj.使人感动的,非常好的,轰动的,耸人听闻的
参考例句:
  • Papers of this kind are full of sensational news reports.这类报纸满是耸人听闻的新闻报道。
  • Their performance was sensational.他们的演出妙极了。
13 mules be18bf53ebe6a97854771cdc8bfe67e6     
骡( mule的名词复数 ); 拖鞋; 顽固的人; 越境运毒者
参考例句:
  • The cart was pulled by two mules. 两匹骡子拉这辆大车。
  • She wore tight trousers and high-heeled mules. 她穿紧身裤和拖鞋式高跟鞋。
14 spun kvjwT     
v.纺,杜撰,急转身
参考例句:
  • His grandmother spun him a yarn at the fire.他奶奶在火炉边给他讲故事。
  • Her skilful fingers spun the wool out to a fine thread.她那灵巧的手指把羊毛纺成了细毛线。
15 unison gKCzB     
n.步调一致,行动一致
参考例句:
  • The governments acted in unison to combat terrorism.这些国家的政府一致行动对付恐怖主义。
  • My feelings are in unison with yours.我的感情与你的感情是一致的。
16 paramount fL9xz     
a.最重要的,最高权力的
参考例句:
  • My paramount object is to save the Union and destroy slavery.我的最高目标是拯救美国,摧毁奴隶制度。
  • Nitrogen is of paramount importance to life on earth.氮对地球上的生命至关重要。
17 civilian uqbzl     
adj.平民的,民用的,民众的
参考例句:
  • There is no reliable information about civilian casualties.关于平民的伤亡还没有确凿的信息。
  • He resigned his commission to take up a civilian job.他辞去军职而从事平民工作。
18 sergeant REQzz     
n.警官,中士
参考例句:
  • His elder brother is a sergeant.他哥哥是个警官。
  • How many stripes are there on the sleeve of a sergeant?陆军中士的袖子上有多少条纹?
19 affected TzUzg0     
adj.不自然的,假装的
参考例句:
  • She showed an affected interest in our subject.她假装对我们的课题感到兴趣。
  • His manners are affected.他的态度不自然。
20 weaver LgWwd     
n.织布工;编织者
参考例句:
  • She was a fast weaver and the cloth was very good.她织布织得很快,而且布的质量很好。
  • The eager weaver did not notice my confusion.热心的纺织工人没有注意到我的狼狈相。
21 transcripts 525c0b10bb61e5ddfdd47d7faa92db26     
n.抄本( transcript的名词复数 );转写本;文字本;副本
参考例句:
  • Like mRNA, both tRNA and rRNA are transcripts of chromosomal DNA. tRNA及rRNA同mRNA一样,都是染色体DNA的转录产物。 来自辞典例句
  • You can't take the transfer students'exam without your transcripts. 没有成绩证明书,你就不能参加转学考试。 来自辞典例句

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