生活大爆炸 第六季:第11集:圣诞节(上)

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Look at that, I built a fireplace with my own two hands. 你看我靠着自己这双手造了个壁炉呢

You're so butch.Aw, I got a little paper cut.Of course you did. 你好龙精虎猛哦。哎哟，被纸割伤手了。完全不意外

Your hands are softer than veal³. 你的芊芊玉手比小牛肉还嫩呢

Oh, before I forget, Saturday I'm planning a little Dungeons⁵ and Dragons night with the guys. 趁我没忘，提醒你一下这周六桌上角色扮演游戏我约了大家玩《龙与地下城》哦。

Really? That's how you're gonna spend your Saturday night? 真的吗？周六晚你就打算这么庆祝啊？

Oh, come on, I hardly ever get a chance to play anymore. Oh, you poor thing. 别这样，我几乎都没什么机会玩了。你个可怜的娃。

Is having a reallife girlfriend who has sex with you getting in the way of your board games? Little bit, yeah. 有个真实存在还能滚床单的女朋友碍着你跟你心爱的小桌游嬉戏了吗？是有一点啦

Oh, great! I've always wanted to play Dungeons and Dragons. 好耶，我一直都想玩玩看《龙与地下城》呢

Yeah, oh, I'm sorry. I should've mentioned this earlier. You're not invited.Why not? 抱歉，是我不好。我应该先说在前头。你未被邀请为什么没有啊

Amy, from time to time,we men need to break free from the shackles⁶ of civility and get in touch with our primal⁷ animalistic selves. 艾米，每隔一段时间我们男人都需要挣脱文明礼仪的束缚并回归原始野性的自我

By rolling dice⁸ and playing makebelieve with little figurines? 就掷掷骰子然后用小人偶玩幻想游戏也算啊？

Yeah, like a bunch of savages⁹.Saturday night? 是啊，又野蛮又粗暴啊。周六晚啊？

But I've been working late all week.That was gonna be our night. 我这周天天都加班，还想着那晚能是二人时光呢

But I have to go. We play as a group. 我不去不行啊。我们大家要一起玩啊。

Ifif I'm not there, then everyone will blame you. 要是我去不成，其他人会说你坏话的

They'll be all, "Bernadette ruined everything. 他们就会说 "伯纳黛特超扫兴

She's the worst."  So, you see? 她个臭八婆"你理解吗？

I have to play Dungeons and Dragons...for the marriage.You're an idiot. 我不能不去玩《龙与地下城》啊，是为我们婚姻着想。你个死白痴

I'm your idiot.Forever. 是你的小白痴。死都甩不掉哦

So, listen, I know we talked about getting a bite to eat in Silver Lake,and then seeing the Christmas lights in Griffith Park, 听我说，我们之前的确是说了要去银湖吃吃东西然后去格里菲斯公园看看圣诞灯饰

but Leonard's talking about a big D and D game at his place. 可莱纳德找我们去他家玩《龙与地下城》呢

Saturday night just went from crazy to epic¹⁰! 周六夜要从嗨翻升级成史诗级啦

All right, Sheldon, to start our quest,you need to open this little Christmas gift I got you. 谢尔顿，要想开始征途你必须先打开我送你的这圣诞礼物

A Christmas gift?  You know I don't enjoy Christmas. What's wrong with Christmas? 圣诞礼物啊？你明知道我不爱圣诞节。圣诞节有什么不好啊

Oh, where to begin? Trees indoors. Overuse of the words "'tis" and "'twas." 太多缺点？不知从何开始室内摆树。猛拽古文例如"此乃"圣诞佳节

And the absurd custom of one stocking. 还有这荒谬的单脚袜习俗

Everyone knows socks belong in pairs. 是人都知道袜子就该成双成对

Who uses one sock? Pirate with a peg¹¹ leg? Actually that helps, thank you. 谁会要单脚袜啊？一只脚是木制假腿的海盗吧？有用处我就舒服多了，谢啦。

Would you just look inside?Oh, a scroll¹². I like scrolls¹³. 就赶紧看里面有啥嘛？是个卷轴。我最爱卷轴了

They're my third favorite system of transmitting the written word. 卷轴是我第三喜爱的文字传输方式

After stone tablets and skywriting. 仅在石碑与飞机空中文字之后

"You have all been summoned to join a thrilling Dungeons and Dragons adventure. "在座各位皆是被召唤来参与紧张刺激的《龙与地下城》冒险的人选

Your quest begins in a secret northern village of elves who have all been massacred." 你们踏上征途的起因是由于一个神秘的北方小精灵村庄被人血洗屠村"

I like where this is heading. 这故事走向我喜欢

"Your task is to rescue their leader from a dungeon⁴ of ogres." "你们的任务是要营救被困于食人魔地下城的村长"

Oh, that's a saucy¹⁴ twist. 好妙的故事转折啊

"That leader's name: Santa Claus""No, no, no! "而村长的名字是...圣诞老人"不  不  不啊

It's actually, "Ho, ho, ho," but you'll get the hang of it. 圣诞老人是"呵  呵  呵"的笑你再多练练就会了

Thought it'd be fun to make a quest with a holiday theme. Fun? 我觉得把节日混合入任务里会很有意思嘛？有意思吗？

Mixing Dungeons and Dragons with Christmas is like making a sandwich of grape jelly,the besttasting jelly, 把《龙与地下城》跟圣诞节混合起来就像是做三明治把最好吃的果冻葡萄果冻

and petroleum¹⁵ jelly, the worsttasting jelly.Okay, here we go. 跟最难吃的果冻(石化制果冻混一起石化制胶状物直译石化制果冻也就是凡士林)好了,开始啦

"You find yourselves in the smoking remains¹⁶ of Santa's village. "你们发现自己身处于圣诞村烟雾弥漫的废墟之中

Clearly, a great battle has taken place." 显然  此地刚发生过一场大战"

Oh, man, the first monster I see,I'm gonna sneak¹⁷ up behind him, whip out my wand,and shoot my magic all over his ass². 好兴奋啊，第一个怪物露头我要潜到他背后，掏出我的小魔棒用我的魔法射满他菊花

Do you hear yourself when you say these things? 你说出这些话时  自己有听到吗

Okay, there are ogre tracks and a trail of broken candy canes¹⁸ in the snow. 在雪地上发现了食人魔足印还有用拐杖糖碎块留下的路线线索

Sheldon, what do you do? 谢尔顿，你采取什么行动？

I signal my contempt for your cruel plan to shove Christmas joy down my throat by making a gesture that says, "get a load of this guy." 我选择这你残酷没人性硬逼我庆祝圣诞节计划以"你们瞧这二货"的言语来加以鄙视

Fine. Howard, what do you do? 行  霍华德  你采取什么行动

I follow the ogre tracks,checking for secret doors along the way. 我选择跟随食人魔足印并在跟踪时检查路上有无暗门密道

And you discover a secret door leading to a dark corridor. 你发现了一个门后是阴暗走廊的暗门

Okay, guys, let's make a plan: spell casters in the back, warriors¹⁹ in the front... 兄弟们，先布置好计划战士走前排  法师站后排

No, screw that noise, I'm going in. 少废话  老子要杀进去了

Hang on, Santa, I'm coming for you! 圣诞老人  撑着点  我来救你了

Okay, you run into a room full of weapons, hit a trip wire......a cannon²⁰ blows your face off, you die, you're out of the game. 你跑进了一件兵器房里触发了陷阱一门大炮炸飞了你的头角色死亡，你出局了

But... a canon?Am I really out of the game?Lucky. 等等一门大炮啊我真的出局了吗？你真幸运

Okay, come on, moving on. 好了，游戏继续进行

Wait, doesn't anyone have a rod of resurrection? 等等，你们身上都没有复活之棒吗

Because if you've got one, I need it bad. 你们谁有我急需这跟小棒棒啊

Get in here with your rod and give it to me. 赶紧掏出你的棒棒  给人家来一棒嘛

Okay, you need to say these things in your head before you say them out loud. 好吧，你说话之前得把原话在脑子里好好过一遍

Hey, guys.I don't mean to interrupt your little game,but I thought you'd like to see what you're missing out on. 伙计们，我不是故意打断你们的小游戏但我觉得你们会想知道  自己都错过了啥

So...Bernadette? Bernadette's wearing leopardprint pumps and a racktastic red dress from Forever 21. 那么...伯纳黛特？伯纳黛特脚踩豹纹高跟鞋身穿爆乳红裙  均购自"永远21"

And there's Amy,showing all kinds of ankle. 接下来是艾米与她的露"脚踝"装

In an outfit²¹ I'm assuming is from Forever 63. 身上那件衣服  我估计是购自"永远63"吧

And I, myself......am wearing a little number that got me out of two speeding tickets and jury duty. 而我自己呢...穿着一条小码紧身裙我可是靠它免了两张超速罚单和陪审员的义务

I know they're making a rhetorical point,I just don't know what it is. 我知道她们是用夸张手法来表达某事可我真看不出是说什么事

See you, boys. We are going drinking. 再见  伙计们  我们要去喝酒啦

Uh, wait, can I come with you? 等等  我能跟你们一起去吗

My character died. Sorry, Raj, it's girls' night out. 我玩的角色死了。抱歉，拉杰，今晚是闺蜜之夜。

Maybe another time.Okay...Come on. 或许下次吧。好吧。走吧

Girls' night, girls' night! 闺蜜之夜  闺蜜之夜

How does he not hear that? 他怎么会听不到自己说这种话呢

So, what's the plan? 有什么大计

Are we gonna teach our fellas a lesson by getting stinking²² drunk,luring strange men into the bathroom, 我们要不要给各自的男友一点教训喝个酩酊大醉，勾引陌生男人到厕所

and turning the toilet stall into a temple of the senses? 把厕所隔间变成性爱感官神殿

No! No!Geez, who's Forever 63 now? 不要！当然不！天啊，现在谁才是"永远63"啊？

Can we get another bottle of champagne²³ for the table? Don't worry. It's my treat.Thanks. 能给我们桌再来一瓶香槟吗？别担心。我请客，谢谢。

You should come to girls' night more often. 你应该多来参加我们的闺蜜之夜

And not just because if you weren't here,this would be a can of Pabst. 绝不是因为如果你不在我们就要从喝香槟沦落为喝啤酒哦

My pleasure; nothing makes me happier than the chance to spoil a lady. 这是我的荣幸；能有机会宠溺女人比任何事都让我开心

Just ask my dog. 不信问问我的狗

My vet²⁴ says if I give her any more foie gras, she's going to die of gout. 兽医说如果我再喂她鹅肝酱她就要死于痛风了（常吃动物类内脏会导致尿酸高从而引起痛风）

Hey, let's help Raj meet a girl tonight. 我们今晚帮拉杰找个姑娘吧

No, no, no, I'm fine. 别了别了  我无所谓

Okay, wait, are we talking onenight stand or do we want to get him into a relationship? 慢着，我们说的是找个姑娘搞一夜情还是找个姑娘谈恋爱呀

Let's get him laid! 找个姑娘把床上

Stop it. You're ruining girls' night. 别这样。闺蜜之夜主角是闺蜜

Raj, you're a great guy,you're in a bar full of single women; let us help you. 拉杰，你是个好男人而且这酒吧全是单身女人；让我们帮你吧。

Yeah, you're a real catch. 对啊  你真的是个好对象

I know you're shy, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't have someone wonderful in your life. 我知道你害羞，但这并不意味着你生命中不应拥有一位佳人

That's sweet of you. 你们真好心

But what can you do to help? 但你们能怎么帮我呢

We'll nose around, see if we can find a nice girl, and then introduce you.Okay. 我们四周打探一下看看能不能找到一个不错的姑娘然后介绍你认识。好吧

Well, a couple of things. 有几点要注意

Don't tell them I come from money. 别告诉她们我出身富庶

I want them to love me for me. 我要她们爱我  而不是爱我的钱

They must be insanely hot. Like, nines or tens.Nines or tens? 她们一定要超级性感。身材样貌起码得有9分或10分。9分或10分吗？

Okay, an eight is acceptable if she's willing to bring another eight to the hot tub. 好吧，8分也可以接受前提是她会带另外一个8分女来跟我三人泡澡

Bottom line: you'll take any woman who'll have you, right? 反正：我们找着啥样的你都会要，对吧？

In a New Delhi minute. 果断会要

I don't remember you buying these miniatures in my store. 我不记得你在我店里买过这些小模型啊

Oh, uh, yeah. I got 'em on Amazon.Sure. I get it. 是没买过。这是在亚马逊上买的。当然，我懂的。

Why support a friend when you can support a multinational²⁵ conglomerate²⁶ that is crushing the life out of that friend? 与其扶持一个朋友为何不去扶持一家把你朋友的生活挤压得穷苦潦倒的跨国大企业呢

I know, but when I shop online,I can do it on the toilet. 我知道，但当我上网购物时我可以边上厕所边买。

Have you seen my store?The whole place is a toilet. 你见过我的店吗？那个地方跟厕所没两样。

Can we please move this along?Yeah, sorry. 能继续进行游戏了吗？可以，抱歉。

Uh, you come to the end of the tunnel and find a large chest.What do you do?And, Howard, do not say,"I feel up the large chest." 你们走到了的尽头发现了一个大宝箱。你将采取什么行动？对了，霍华德，拜托不要说"我要上去抓一把"

Excuse me, I'm a married man now. 不好意思，我现在可是已婚男人

I wasn't going to say anything so juvenile²⁷. 我才不会说这么幼稚的话呢

Great. What do you do? 很好。那你会怎么做

I walk up to the large chest,bury my face in it and go. 我会走到那个大胸（大宝箱)前把我的脸埋进去然后这样玩

I open the chest.  It's locked,but suddenly the door behind you slams shut and now the walls of the room start closing in. 我选择打开宝箱.锁着呢但你身后的门突然砰一声关上现在房间两侧的墙壁开始往中间逼近

That's not good.My character and I both have claustrophobia. 这下惨了.我和我的角色都有幽闭恐惧症。

Glowing letters appear on the chest that read, "If squashed to death you wish not to be, sing of Svaty Vaclav and his victory." 宝箱上出现发光的字上面写着"如果你不想被夹死那就高歌圣威特?瓦茨拉夫和他的胜利"

Who the hell is Svaty Vaclav?  Walls are getting closer.Oh, boy, happy place, happy place. 谁是圣威特?瓦茨拉夫？墙越来越近了。我得赶紧想着开心的地方通常有病的人要靠想着开心的地方转移注意力

Wait, Svaty Vaclav was the Duke of Bohemia.You're ten seconds away from getting crushed!Nine, eight... 等等，圣威特?瓦茨拉夫是波西米亚的君主。你还有十秒钟就要被夹成肉酱了！九  八...

What are we supposed to do?...seven, six...  Wait, wait. 我们该怎么办？七、六等下，等下。

Svaty Vaclav is better known as Good King Wenceslas from the beloved Victorian Christmas carol. 圣威特?瓦茨拉夫就是受人喜爱的维多利亚时代圣诞颂歌里的仁君温瑟拉

Never heard of it.Must be the one Christmas song not written by a Jewish guy....three, two... 从来没听说过肯定就那首圣诞颂歌不是犹太人写的三  二...

Somebody sing the damn song! 快唱那首该死的颂歌

Good King Wenceslas looked out On the feast of Stephen 是日圣徒节贤君帘外望

When the snow lay 'round about Deep and crisp and even 积雪覆大地松脆且平旷

The walls are getting slower.Brightly shone the moon that night 墙越来越近啦，是夜月皎皎

Though the frost was cruel When a poor man came in sight Gath'ring winter fuel 寒霜亦凄凄但见褴褛者拾薪不停息

The walls stop! You're safe! That was amazing, Sheldon. 墙壁停下了！你们安全了！你可真牛，谢尔顿。

How did you know that? It was simple. 你怎么会唱这个？很简单。

I combined a wellknown, historical fact about Bohemia with the memory of my grandparents, 我将一个关于波西米亚的知名历史事件与我对外祖父母的记忆结合在一起

MeeMaw and PopPop, singing Christmas carols while I sat in front of the fire and tried to build a highenergy particle accelerator out of Legos. 那时候外公和外婆，唱着圣诞颂歌而我在壁炉前尝试用乐高来制造一个高能粒子加速器

 

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