生活大爆炸 第六季:第21集:博客(下)

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And you wonder why people think neuroscience is nothing but a goofy game for diaper babies. 你现在知道为什么人们认为神经学不过是小儿科的愚蠢游戏了吧

Tic-tac-toe can only end in win, lose or draw...none of which will deny me closure. 井字游戏肯定会有赢， 输， 或平手的结局完全没办法阻止我得到结局的乐趣

Especially since I'm about to win.B-But we didn't finish. Exactly. 特别是我即将胜出的情况下。我们还没玩完呢。正是

How does that make you feel? 你对此有何感觉

The same way any normal person would. 跟任何正常人一样啊

Feel like I want to peel off my own face and tear it in two and then again and again until I have a handful of Sheldon-face confetti. 我想扯掉自己的脸撕成两半， 然后不停地撕直到我的脸碎成渣

And that's exactly the feeling we want to address with this course of treatment. 今日的治疗针对的正是这种感觉

Yeah, or you could pitch in, grab a nostril¹ and help me get this face off. 或者你可以帮个忙， 抓我的鼻孔帮我把这玩意撕下来

Come on, you can do this. 加油啊， 你行的

You don't know what it's like to feel completely frustrated². 你不能理解这种闹心的感觉是何滋味

To have a-a desire build up within you and be denied any opportunity for release. 心中逐渐建立起了强烈的欲望最后却只能憋着， 无处释放

Yeah, sounds like a drag.Okay, help me out here. 听起来是很惨啊。帮我分析分析

Why does he love this show so much? 他为什么这么喜欢这个剧

Well, there was action, it was funny. 片中有动作场面， 也很搞笑

I mean, you do get that usually the monster chases the pretty girl, 你明白通常都是怪物追美女

but this time the pretty girl chases the monsters? 而这里是美女追怪物吧

Yippee, it's backwards³. I get it. 耶嘿， 反过来啦， 我明白

Why does this bother you so much?  I don't know. 你为什么这么困扰这事啊？不知道

It's just, he's so passionate⁴ about so many different things. 他总是为这么多东西感到兴奋

I just don't get that way. Do you? 我就做不到那样。你行吗

Well, sure. I'm pretty passionate about science. 可以啊， 我对科学就很热爱

I remember the first time I looked through a microscope and saw millions of tiny microorganisms. 我还记得第一次看显微镜下那无数微生物时的场景

It was like a whole other universe. 简直就像另一个宇宙

If I wanted to, I could wipe it out with my thumb like a god. 只要姐愿意， 就可以像神一样用大拇指按死它们

See? I wish I had some of that fire in my life. 瞧， 我也想找点这种热情

I mean, I want to care about things and get excited like you guys. 我也想有特别在乎的东西像你们一样为之兴奋

Well, there's no reason you can't. You think? 你完全可以啊。你这么认为吗？

Absolutely. All we need to do is spend a little time and find something you're passionate about. 当然了， 我们需要做的只是花点时间， 找到你所热爱的东西

That sounds like a lot of work.Hey, what's up? 听起来好累啊。怎么啦？

Uh, Lucy's coming over. I need some advice. 露西要来， 我需要点建议

However long you think the foreplay should be, triple it. 不管你认为前奏该有多长， 加成三倍

Just tell me which one you think is more manly⁵. 你就说说哪件会更有男子气概吧

This hockey jersey⁶ or...this football jersey. 曲棍球运动衫还是橄榄球运动衫

I don't know. Go with hockey. 我也不知道， 穿曲棍球的吧

Good-- black is more slimming. Oh, that's her. 很好， 黑色显瘦。她来了

I got to go be butch. Toodles. Come in. 我要去当壮汉了， 拜拜。请进

Oh, look how cute your little doggy is. 瞧瞧你这可爱的小狗狗

Yeah, well, I wouldn't get too close. 别离它太近

If I give the right command in German,she'll rip your face off. 如果我用德语给她下个命令她就会把你的脸撕下来

O'er the land of the free And the home of the... Next. 在这自由国家，勇士的...（完整歌词是"勇士的家乡"）下一个

That's quite an impressive layout, isn't it? 这设计可真不错， 对吗

Yes.Let's box it up.  "Let's box it up."That's enough. 是的。收起来吧。收起来吧。够了

Sheldon, Sheldon, give it! 谢尔顿， 谢尔顿， 给我

Okay, Sheldon, make a wish and blow out the candles. 好了， 谢尔顿， 许个愿然后吹蜡烛吧

Oops, missed one. 惨了， 漏了一支

Now your wish can't come true. 现在你的愿望不能实现了

Lucky for you, 'cause I wished you were dead. 你真幸运， 我许的愿是你死了

I like your jersey. 我喜欢你的运动衫

Thanks. I love hockey. 谢谢夸奖， 我喜欢曲棍球

Oh, cool. So does my dad. 真不错， 我爸爸也喜欢

We watched it all the time growing up. 我从小就和他一起看比赛

Who's your favorite player? 你最喜欢的球员是谁

Not Brian Boitano, that's for sure. 不是布莱恩?博伊塔诺就是了（美国花样滑冰冠军）

How's your burrito? 你的玉米饼好吃吗

It's still a little frozen in the middle. 这饼中间还有点没化冻呢

Probably because I didn't read the instructions. 那是因为我没有读说明书的缘故

No wrapper's going to tell me what to do. 我从来不看包装纸上的说明（饶舌歌手）

Unless his name is Jay-Z. 除非上面写的是杰斯的饶舌

Is something going on? What do you mean? 你有什么事吗？此话怎讲

Well, you're acting⁷ all weird⁸. 你表现一直怪怪的

And I'm pretty weird, so I think I know what I'm talking about. 我自己本身就够怪的了连我觉得怪， 那可是真的怪

I don't know. Maybe it's all those steroids I've been taking. 我也不知道， 或许是因为我最近吃的类固醇吧

I think I'm gonna go. 我看我还是走吧

Thank you for the burrito and the pork rinds and the 20-minute lecture on why monster trucks are better than regular trucks. 谢谢你的玉米饼， 煎猪皮还有足足20分钟的关于为什么怪物卡车比普通卡车强的讲座

Wait, wait. I-I found your blog where you wrote about me. 等等， 等一下。我看到你写的关于我的博客了

Oh. I kind of just write that for myself. 我那是写给我自己看的

I didn't think anybody actually read it. 我没想过会有人真来读

No kidding. You didn't make it easy to find. 那倒是， 你藏的还挺隐秘的

I spent hours digging around online. 我上网找了好久才找到呢

For the record, you have excellent credit scores. 顺带一提， 你的信用记录挺好的

And your diabetic aunt seems to be adjusting to her new leg just fine. 还有你那个得糖尿病的阿姨看起来也挺适应她那条新腿的

Why were you acting so strange tonight? 你今天怎么表现得这么奇怪呢

You called me feminine. 你说我这人太女性化了

And I... I wanted you to think I was more manly. 所以我我想在你面前表现得阳刚一点

Raj, I didn't say "feminine" was a bad thing. 拉杰， 我说的女性化并不是坏事

I meant that you're sweet and thoughtful and your skin looks so much like caramel, 我是指你又贴心又善解人意还有你的皮肤就像焦糖

I just want to dip an apple in your face. 让我想用苹果沾着吃

I do have a pretty balls-to-the-wall moisturizing regimen. 我的确有一套超棒的在保湿秘方

So, are you okay? Yeah.   Good. 所以， 你没事吧？没事，那就好

Do you even like hockey? No. 那你真的喜欢冰球吗？当然不

Bought this at the Staples⁹ Center when I went to see Taylor Swift. 这套衣服是我去斯台普斯球馆看泰勒?斯威夫特演唱会时买的

So, I was thinking how excited you get about stuff like Buffy or science 我思考了一下你总是为吸血鬼猎人巴菲呀， 科学呀

or which TV remote you and Sheldon should buy. 或你和谢尔顿为了买哪个遥控器而激动吵架

The "Harmony One" was fine. "和谐一号"已经很不错了

We didn't need to upgrade to the 1100,which he knows is too big for my hand. 根本没必要升级到1100型他知道我手太小拿不了那个型号的

See, that's the kind of passion I didn't think I had. 你看， 你这种激情就是我所没有的

But then I realized I'm passionate about you. 但我后来意识到， 我对你本人就有激情

Oh... my cute little tushy strikes again. 是我的可爱小翘臀起了作用吧

No, I'm serious.Look, I've always had these plans. 不， 我是说真的。我一直觉得

I was gonna be in movies and live this glamorous¹⁰ life,and anything less than that just wasn't worth getting excited about. 我会变成电影明星， 过着五光十色的生活而和这些无关的东西都不值得我激动

Those things can still happen. Oh, obviously it's gonna happen. 你说的那些还是有可能发生的。这一切当然是会发生的

Yeah, a psychic¹¹ at a bachelorette party told me so. 有个单身派对上的算命师已经帮我算过了

Anyway, what I meant was...I shouldn't wait, you know? 但我想说的是我不该再观望下去了， 懂吗

I've got you, I've got Sheldon,all these wonderful friends. 我有你， 我有谢尔顿这么多超级棒的朋友

My life is exciting right now.That's a big deal.It is, isn't it? 我的生活已经足够精彩了。这的确很重要。的确如此， 对不对

So, does that mean we get to do stuff like talk about cool shows or get dressed up 这是不是就意味着我们可以开始一起讨论那些好看的电视， 或者穿着

in matching costumes and go to Comic-Con? 情侣变装制服一起去参加漫画大会了

Leonard, I had an epiphany, not a stroke. 莱诺德， 我只是顿悟， 不是突然中风好吗

Amy, I must say, I was skeptical¹² at first, 艾米， 我得说， 一开始我是抱着怀疑的态度

but this has truly been a transformative evening. 但今晚的确是充满改革性的一夜呀

I'm a little surprised to hear you feeling so positive. 你能有如此正面的态度， 我还真有点小惊讶

Well, you're an excellent neuroscientist, 你是个出色的神经学家

you're a wonderful girlfriend, and...And? 也是个很棒的女朋友， 还是还是

Doesn't matter, does it?I'm proud of you, Sheldon. 这不重要， 对吧？我真为你自豪， 谢尔顿

And a complete sucker.Oh, yeah.There he is. 还是个彻头彻尾的笨蛋。我赢了出来了

And the home of the brave...Don't stop. Yes, keep going. 也是勇气的家乡，别停下， 继续继续

Just like that. Almost there, almost there. 就是这样， 马上就成功了， 就要到头了

Sheldon, you big weirdo,I want you to know that I love that you're in my life.I love you, too. 谢尔顿， 你个怪胎我要你知道， 我喜欢有你在我身边我也喜欢你

Hello. Uh, is this the Bruce Miller¹³ who wrote the season finale of Alphas? 请问， 你是阿尔法战士季终集的编剧布鲁斯?米勒吗

Oh, smashing. Yeah, you already sound nicer than the last Bruce Miller who suggested 太好了， 你已经比前一个要我自己跟自己做爱的布鲁斯?米勒

I have sexual relations with myself. 听起来友善多了

Yeah, now, down to business. 好了， 现在言归正传

Um, your show ended on a cliffhanger. 你这剧最后埋下了一个悬念

Could you please tell me how you planned to resolve it? I see. 你能告诉我你打算怎么解决它吗？我明白了

Well, that all stinks¹⁴.No wonder you got canceled. Bye. 这也太烂了吧。怪不得你这剧被取消了呢， 回见

 

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