(单词翻译:单击)
Marjorie Baer used to joke about her retirement1 plans. She wasn't married and had no kids, but she didn't intend to be alone—she and all her single friends would move into a fictional(虚构的,小说的) home she called Casa de Biddies. Instead, Baer developed terminal brain cancer when she was 52. But just as she'd hoped, her friends and family provided her with love and care to the end.
Baer's friends Lee Ballance and Mary Selkirk were walking their dog one afternoon in July 2006 when they saw an ambulance in front of her house. Baer had had a seizure2 and collapsed3. Ballance, a physician, hopped4 in(上车) his car and followed the ambulance to the hospital to be at Baer's side while doctors tried to figure out what was going on. When they did, the news wasn't good: She had glioblastoma multiforme(多形性成胶质细胞瘤) , a particularly aggressive form of brain cancer.
Ballance was only the first of Baer's friends who became her unofficial caregivers. Until her brother Phil Baer put his marriage and work in Los Angeles on hold to care for his sister during her final weeks, they cobbled(铺) together a system to watch over their friend and allow her to keep some of the privacy and independence she cherished.
Baer's good friend Ruth Henrich took the lead. That seemed natural: Henrich, then 58, and Baer both worked in publishing and lived in the same duplex(占两层楼的公寓套房) . Though busy in her job as an associate managing editor at salon5.com, Henrich took Baer to doctors' appointments and helped her deal with all the aspects of life that were becoming increasingly mysterious to her—answering machines, TV controls, and even phone numbers. After Henrich sent out an e-mail request, a group of volunteers signed up to ferry Baer back and forth6 to radiation therapy. Others in Baer's circle offered up particular talents: A nurse friend helped Baer figure out how to get what she was due from Social Security and her disability insurance; an attorney pal(朋友,伙伴) helped Baer with her will; a buddy7 who was an accountant took over her bills when she could no longer manage them. "There was this odd sense that the right person always showed up," says Ballance.
Not that it was easy. "I had to know at all times who was going to be there and anticipate what Marjorie would need next, so it was always on my mind," says Henrich. "It was something I wanted to do, but it also never went away." Still, their jury-rigged arrangement worked remarkably8 well. Even as Baer lost the ability to read and write and engage in conversation over the course of the year, she was able to continue to live on her own, walk to the market, take the subway to painting classes, and even fly to Iowa by herself to visit her brother Tom and his family.
"She was a generous person," says another friend, Elizabeth Whipple, "and it came back to her in truckloads."
Unmarried women are one of the fastest-growing demographic(人口统计学的) groups in America, and increasing numbers of men are remaining single, too; experts are concerned about how caregiving will be managed for both groups as they age. If the experience of Baer's friends is a guide, the Internet will play a role. It's already making it possible to create communities of caregivers who may have only one thing in common: the person who needs their help. On personal "care pages" set up through services such as Lotsa Helping9 Hands, friends and family members can post a list of tasks that need to be done, volunteer to do them, and keep updated on the person's condition. As Baer's cancer progressed, for example, her friends set up a page on Yahoo! where people could sign up to deliver meals or do errands(差事,使命) .
Eventually, their help wasn't enough. One morning, a year after Baer's diagnosis10, Henrich checked in before work and found Baer on the floor. Though she wore a panic button on a chain around her neck, she hadn't used it. "I don't know how long she had been there," Henrich says.
That was when Baer's brother Phil stepped in. He and Tom had taken turns earlier making trips to Berkeley to care for their sister; now Phil, who lived in Los Angeles, took leave from his job as head of air-conditioning and heating at CBS Studio Center—and from his understanding wife, Joyce—to care for Baer full-time11. "There was just no question in my mind that I would do anything I could, including switch places with Marjorie," he says. "It made me realize how much I loved her."
For the next few weeks, Phil looked after her during the day. He oversaw12 the nighttime caregivers and consulted with the hospice(旅客招待所,收容所) workers who assisted with medical issues and helped him prepare for Baer's death. But even then, his sister's loyal friends were irreplaceable, he says, providing both practical and emotional sustenance(生计,食物) .
Several of Baer's friends were there when she died. "We were all trying to help ease her passing," says Whipple. "Phil put his hands on her chest, and she let go."
Catherine Fox, one of the friends who was present when Baer died, was deeply affected13. "It was so comforting to know that if you're willing to ask for help, the generosity14 of family and friends can be phenomenal(异常的,显著的) . It makes me feel secure and hopeful to know that help is there when you need it."
1 retirement | |
n.退休,退职 | |
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2 seizure | |
n.没收;占有;抵押 | |
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3 collapsed | |
adj.倒塌的 | |
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4 hopped | |
跳上[下]( hop的过去式和过去分词 ); 单足蹦跳; 齐足(或双足)跳行; 摘葎草花 | |
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5 salon | |
n.[法]沙龙;客厅;营业性的高级服务室 | |
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6 forth | |
adv.向前;向外,往外 | |
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7 buddy | |
n.(美口)密友,伙伴 | |
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8 remarkably | |
ad.不同寻常地,相当地 | |
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9 helping | |
n.食物的一份&adj.帮助人的,辅助的 | |
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10 diagnosis | |
n.诊断,诊断结果,调查分析,判断 | |
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11 full-time | |
adj.满工作日的或工作周的,全时间的 | |
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12 oversaw | |
v.监督,监视( oversee的过去式 ) | |
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13 affected | |
adj.不自然的,假装的 | |
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14 generosity | |
n.大度,慷慨,慷慨的行为 | |
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