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Hello. I’m Tony Ford.
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And I’m Marina Santee. Welcome to Spotlight. This programme uses a special English method of broadcasting. It is easier for people to understand, no matter where in the world they live.
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Every year thousands of young people compete for limited places at universities. This is especially true in South Korea. Students study very hard. They need to pass tests to enter university. And their parents expect them to do well. This puts a lot of pressure on the young people. They know their future depends on the results. But some of them cannot pass the tests no matter how hard they try. Kim Myuang was twenty years old. He was one of these young people who could not pass the test. And he felt very worried. He did not know what to do. He felt discouraged - he lost hope. So he stopped trying. And he started playing games on the internet instead. He played for hours and hours everyday.
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Everyone feels discouraged sometimes. But for some people this hopeless feeling can become severe. And they may not know what to do. They may feel that no one understands their situation. Rick Warren is a Christian leader and writer. People often ask him questions about difficult problems. One question they ask is ‘How can I deal with discouragement?’ In today’s Spotlight we will tell some of Rick’s answers. But first we go back to Kim’s story.
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Kim Myung felt discouraged because he failed his university tests. This failure made him stop trying. And it made him sad. Many people are like Kim. When they fail, they feel sorry for themselves. Some people may feel anger - and they look for other people to blame. Or they blame themselves. They may think ‘Why did I ever try to do this? It is impossible’. A person’s way of looking at the situation is very important. Rick says:
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“You may feel bad. But it does not mean you are doing the wrong thing. You can be doing the right thing in the wrong way. Do not give up. Try a new way.”
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Rick uses the example of a sick person. When people are sick, they try different cures. Sick people do not just go to one doctor. They may try several doctors. Or they may try a new diet, or new medicines.
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Kim Myung decided to try a new way. He went to a treatment centre. At that centre he got emotional support. He learned to deal with pressures in his life. Kim Myung’s problems are common in South Korea. The South Korean government is very concerned about this situation. It built a public treatment centre for people to get help. It also started a telephone support system. People can call a telephone number and talk to someone about their problems. They can receive information about treatments centres too.
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But not all students seek help. Many experience increased pressure to do well without talking about it. Such students study all day at school. Then, they study with private teachers for four or five hours a day. These children become tired. Their bodies are tired. Their minds are tired. Tiredness is a big cause of discouragement.
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Usually people start a project with a lot of energy. They feel good in the beginning. But in the middle of the project they start to feel tired. This is the time many people give up - they stop trying. But all they may need to do is rest for a while. Everyone needs time to rest and relax. Rick Warren states:
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“Take time off to enjoy life. Many of our problems come because we cannot sit still. Rest is a need. Take time to renew your mind.”
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University tests may cause pressure. But so does work. Around the world people seem to be getting busier. Some people have to work very long hours. They have many duties. They feel that there is no time to rest. They may feel under great pressure to always be at work. This kind of pressure leads to discouragement. Tina is a woman who worked long hours. And she started to feel discouraged. She said:
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“I thought, ‘There must be more to life than this’. I was working such long hours. I had very little social life. I could not face a future like this.”
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Tina made her job the most important thing in her life. Maybe her goal was to get a high position at work. Maybe she wanted to earn a lot of money. But she was not happy. She did not have anyone to support her. Spending time with other people is important. People need other people for support. They need friends who will encourage them. Busy times at work are a part of life. So is pressure. But these things do not need to control a person. Rick says:
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“Some of you are discouraged by intense pressure at work. Reorganize your time. Reorganize your way of living. And re-examine your goals. Busyness is a great enemy of friendships. We are concerned with making money. We need to pay all our bills. So we work all the time. We have to meet our targets. We think these things are the point of life. They are not. The point of life is learning to love - to love God and to love other people.”
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Some people do spend time with other people. Yet they spend all their time trying to please these people. They fear what others think of them. Or they fear bad comments. This makes them want to be perfect. Sometimes they do things they do not want to do to please another person. They may even try to do other people’s duties. In the end, the extra effort does not make them happy. It is not possible to please everyone. People who try to please everyone experience increased pressure. They become very discouraged. And they may want to run away from their problems. Rick says:
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“In life there are only three ways you can move - against something in anger, away from something in fear, or with it in love.”
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Rick is saying that people may attack a person or thing because it gives them problems. Or they move away from something or someone in fear. But they could move with something in love. This may mean that they have the courage to believe in themselves. They do not let other people’s opinions change the way they think or act. They are strong in what they believe. But they still show kindness to other people.
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People who learn how to fight discouragement learn how to defeat it. Discouragement is just one issue that Rick Warren has examined. Listen out for more issues on other Spotlight programmes.
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