I'm 20 years old. My boyfriend and I have a 6-month-old baby boy. When I met "Jake," he was 18, had never worked a day in his life and was a serious drug addict. I got him to stop doing drugs and he even got a job, although his hiring cost me my position.

We moved in together when I turned 18, and I discovered he's extremely controlling.

Jake doesn't want me to get a job, but he won't buy things we need. I can't have money unless he gives it to me, and then he grills me about how I spend it. He also kicks and pushes me.

I want to get out, but it's been three years since I've had a job and I'm not sure I can get another one. I have no money, my car is busted and now I have a baby to take care of. I love Jake, but I need to leave. How do I do it? － Lost and Helpless

Dear Lost:

At your age, those three unemployed years won't hurt you when you look for a job. More importantly, you and your son are in a dangerously abusive relationship, and you must get out immediately. Call the National Domestic Violence Hotline (ndvh.org) at 1-800-799-SAFE and ask for help. Do it today.