My 24-year-old son and his wife are the parents of two toddler boys and are expecting another baby soon. They live four hours away. I recently learned that my son goes off to work early in the morning and his wife sleeps until noon, while the boys are locked in their bedroom "watching cartoons."

I don't know what they tell themselves to be convinced this is OK. I think it is serious child neglect and poses a danger to the boys. I am really worried, but I'm afraid if I say anything, I could alienate both my son and daughter-in-law. But Annie, I can't just do nothing. Any suggestions? － Scared Grandmother

Dear Grandmother:

Why is Mom sleeping until noon? Is she ill? Is she depressed? Of course it's dangerous to leave young children locked in a room for hours, but you might get better results if you address this as a matter of health, instead of an issue of child neglect. Lovingly tell your son that you are concerned about the level of exhaustion his pregnant wife is experiencing. She should speak to her doctor about this immediately, and in the meantime they should look into hiring a sitter or having your son drop the kids at a day care center until Mom can pick them up.