我和我的妻子结婚了近25年。我们是疯狂的喜欢,我们在一起很快乐。我们的幸福来自一整天都在一起做事--每一天。也许我们的经验可以帮助你在你的日常生活像我们一样相爱。

　　Here are moments to look for (or create) to make sure your relationship lasts.

　　这里有能确保你们的感情会走到最后的一些时刻。

　　Moments of Joyful Service

　　快乐的服务时刻

　　Earlier this evening, my wife was working on dinner. When I said, “Thank you for cooking dinner,” she turned and replied with a smile, “Thank YOU for cooking dinner.” You see, we were making dinner together. I wanted to show my appreciation for her effort. Neither of us especially enjoys cooking. However, we are happy to cook for the other. We do this mundane task with joy. Why? Because the task must be done anyway. Doing it as a joyful service keeps out the poison of resentment. Completing a task in this manner gives it special meaning. Look at it like, I’m not just making dinner, I’m making dinner for the one I love. Look for moments to serve with joy.

　　今晚早些时候,我妻子正在准备晚饭。当我说：“谢谢你准备晚饭”,她转身用微笑做答,“谢谢你做饭。”你看,我们是一起在做晚餐。我想表示对她付出的感谢。我们都特别不喜欢烹饪。然而,我们很乐意为对方准备食物。我们就这样快乐的做这个平凡的事情。为什么?因为不管怎样这个事情都必须要完成。不要让做快乐的服务变成怨恨的毒药。以这种方式完成这件事情就赋予了它特殊的意义。这样看,我不仅仅是在做饭,我是在为我爱的人做饭。寻找为她服务的欢乐时刻。

　　Moments Filled with Words of Endearment

　　充满了钟爱话语的时刻

　　I almost never call my wife by her given name. I use terms such as “my love”, “pretty girl”, and “love of my life”. Such terms remind her of how much I care for her, but more importantly they are a reminder for me. It’s hard to be upset with someone you call “my love” multiple times a day. Every time I call her by those terms of endearment it burrows into my subconscious, constantly reinforcing the bond between us.

　　我打电话给我老婆几乎从不叫她的名字。我使用一些昵称,比如“亲爱的”、“漂亮的女孩”,“挚爱”。这样的昵称会让她知道我有多爱她,但更重要的是在提醒我。每天很多次叫她“我的爱人”，这样很难让人生气。每次我都潜意识的这样打电话给她,这样就能不断地加强我们之间的感情。

　　Moments of Compliments

　　赞美的时刻

　　What do your friends think of your loved one? Their opinions of your special person come from two places: interactions your friends have with him or her, and what you say about your loved one. When I am speaking speaking with someone and the topic of marriage comes up I am unfailingly complimentary to my wife. Don’t put me on a pedestal here. I just know how blessed I am to be married to her – and I want it to stay that way. Telling her in person is great, but if she hears it from a third party then it is even more powerful.

　　你的朋友对你的爱人是什么看法?他们对你的她的意见:她和你朋友的交流，你说出的关于你爱人的话。当我与人交谈婚姻的话题是,我总是赞美我的妻子。不要把我看成一个标准。我只知道我是多么的幸福才娶到她,我希望她继续这样走下去。亲自告诉她是非常棒的,但是如果她从第三个人那里听见，那么这种效果会更好。

　　Moments of Love

　　爱的时刻

　　I realize this one seems obvious, but stay with me here. One thing we learned very early in our marriage is that not everyone feels love in the same way. In his wonderful book The Five Love Languages, Dr. Gary Chapman reveals the curious truth that most of us are showing love incorrectly to our spouses and loved ones. He likens it to one person speaking English while the other only understands Chinese.

　　我觉得这一点似乎是显而易见的,但要停一下。在我们婚姻的很早期的时候就教会了我们一件事情：不是每个人感受爱的方式是一样的。在《爱的五种语言》这本书是很棒的书,加里·查普曼博士揭示了很棒的真理,我们大多数人对我们的配偶或是爱人的表现爱的方式都是不对的。他把它比作成一个人在说英语,而另一个只了解中国。

　　One of the greatest challenges to making a relationship last is discovering and learning to love each other in a way that is understood. My wife’s love languages are quality time and physical touch. Do you know what I do? I spend time every day sitting down and talking with her. When we walk together I reach out and take her hand. I consciously love her in the ways that make her feel loved.

　　其中让感情走到最后最大挑战之一就是找到和学习彼此理解的相爱方式。我的妻子喜欢优质时间的交流以及身体接触。你知道我做什么吗?我每天都花时间坐下来和她说话。当我们走在一起时我就伸出手,牵着她的手。我这种有意识地爱她的方式让她能感受到被爱。

　　Conclusion

　　总结

　　There are no secrets to making a relationship last. It is simple, but not necessarily easy. The simplicity is in making moments every day that show service, endearment, compliments, and powerful love to another person. The challenge is to be consistent, but you can do it!

　　让感情走到最后没有秘诀。它很简单,但是并不容易。简单到就是每天都有服务,喊昵称,赞美,以及用强大的爱去爱另一个人的时刻。面临的挑战是一致的,但你可以做到!Let love be your motivator.让爱成为你的动力。