英国新闻听力 男人第一次约会常犯的错误（在线收听）

The dating world is full of pitfalls, especially when it's done online.

现如今，约会，尤其是网上交友，充满了诱惑和陷阱。

There are many people out there all with different profiles promising different things.

各色各样的人，会发生各种各样的事。

The British journalist Natasha Devin was challenged by a friend to accept every date she was asked on over a two-month period.

英国记者娜塔莎·德文的朋友向她发起了一项挑战——接受两个月内的所有约会邀请。

She spoke to Dan Damon.

她与丹·达蒙进行了交谈。

I think my favorite date was one where we actually just went for coffee.

最满意的那次约会，我们只是去喝了杯咖啡。

It was during his hour-long lunch break.

他是趁午休时间过来的。

So there was a time limit on how much time we could spend together.

所以我们在一起的时间是有限的。

And we just had a very relaxed chat.

我们很放松地在聊天。

And I felt like I could just be myself.

我觉得很自在。

And I think all the sixty days,

通过60天的实验，我明白了，

I think that what the experiment taught me is that the mark of a good date is how comfortable you feel simply to be yourself

成功的约会意味着你很舒适、很自在，

and not have to put on a show or represent only the most palatable aspects of yourself.

不用伪装或是把自己最好的一面展现出来。

And who was the most uncomfortable date?

谁是让你最难受的约会对象？

The most uncomfortable date was a guy who insisted on analyzing the date as it happens.

让我最难受的那个人一直在约会过程中分析这个约会的进展。

So about every ten minutes, he would ask me how I thought it was going.

他每隔10分钟就会问我，感觉这次约会怎么样。

And I think it was just the mark of the fact that he was perhaps a little bit nervous.

我觉得从这一点就能看出他可能有点紧张。

And that's one of your points, isn't it?

这是你的看法之一，对吧？

It's one of the ten things that you should not do on a date, to say "how do you think it's going".

说“你觉得这次约会怎么样”是约会上最不该做的十件事之一。

Give us a couple of the others.

给我们举一些别的例子吧。

A couple of the guys I went out with were very uninterested.

有几个约会对象态度非常冷淡。

They knew what the right questions to ask.

他们知道该问什么

But then when I opened my mouth to respond,

但是我正要开口回答时，

immediately they would start looking in a different direction or looking over my shoulder to see who was coming in the door.

他们就立刻看向别处，甚至目光从我的肩膀上方穿过，看谁进门了。

And I thought what's the point of us being here.

我就在想，我们坐在这儿的意义是什么。

And another one that was very very common was not having any plan.

另一个非常常见的错误就是不制定计划。

And when someone asks you out on a date, I, at the very least,

有人约你的时候，

expect that they will have some kind of idea in their mind of what you will be doing together.

我至少会认为那个人知道你们俩在一起做点什么。

But a surprising number of them, I met them, and they'd ask me what I thought we should do.

但令我吃惊的是，特别多的人在见面后会问我，我们该做什么。

And a lot of the time I was in an unfamiliar part of town and I didn't really know what there was to do in that area.

而很多时候我对那一片不熟悉，不太知道有什么好玩儿的。

And so we spent the first fifteen minutes of the date kind of wandering around aimlessly.

所以，前十五分钟，我们都在漫无目的地闲逛。

And it gets off on a wrong foot, I think.

我觉得这种约会一开始就犯了错。

It's surprising actually and I do think it's a generational thing because some of the guys that asked me out were a little bit younger than me.

我其实很吃惊，觉得这是年代的问题，因为有些约我出去的人年龄比我小一点。

I was in my late twenties at that time.

我当时不到三十。

And they were in their early twenties.

他们才二十出头。

And I found that if they were younger, it was just routine.

我发现，对年龄比我小的人来说，玩儿手机是经常性动作。

They just played with their phones all the time no matter what they happened to be doing, almost like it was an extension of their hand.

不管他们在做什么，都会一直玩儿手机，手机差不多成他们的第三只手了。