Unit 9 PeopleThanks Anyway(M)
A man was walking on a railroadwhen suddenly he got his foot caught in the tracksHe tried to get it out but it was really stuckHe heard a noise and turned around to see a train comingHe panicked and started to pray,"God.please get my foot out of these tracks and I'll stop drinking!"Nothing happened,it was still stuckk,and the train was getting closer!
He prayed again,"God,please get my foot out and I'll stop drinking and smoking."Still nothing happened,and the train was just seconds away!
He tried it one more time,"God,please,if you get my foot out,I'll quit drinking,smoking,and gambling."Suddenly his foot shot out of the tracks,and he was able to dive out of the way just in timeHe got up,dusted himself off,looked toward heaven and said,"Thanks anyway,God.I got it myself."$100,000(M)Nick won $100,000 from gamblingAfter he came back,he immediately went to the backyard of his housedug a hole and planted the money in itThe following morning he walked outside and found only an empty holeHe noticed footsteps leading from the hole to the house next doorwhich was owned by a Russian womanOn the same street lived a professor who spoke Russianand was a friend of the Russian womanGrabbing his gun,Nick went to awaken the professorHe dragged the professor to the Russian woman's house"You tell her if she doesn't give me back my $100,000,I'm going to kill her!"Nick screamed at the professorThe professor told the message to his friend,and she replied in Russian"I hid it in my backyard,underneath the apple tree."The professor turned to Nick"She's not going to tell you.She said she'd rather die first."Firm Believer in God(M)Judy is sinking in her boat,and the water is up to her knees.
A man in another boat pulls up to her and tells her to get into the boatJudy says,"I'm a firm believer in God,and He will save me."The man shrugs his shoulders and rows awayNow the water is up to Judy's waist,and another boat pulls up to her and the driver tells her to get in.
Like before,all Judy says is,"I'm a firm believer in God,and He will save me."So the second man drives away,too.
Now with the water up to her chin,a rescue helicopter drops a rope ladder downand the man tells her to climb upAll she says is,"I'm a firm believer in God,and He will save me."So the helicopter flies awayA few hours later,Judy drowns in the waterWhen she gets up to heaven,she says to an angel,"Hey,why didn't God save me?!"The angel replies,"Well,He sent you two boats and a helicopter!" |