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英文笑话

   幽默笑话,像一朵划破暗夜的礼花,为你带来愉悦的同时,让整个身心得到彻底的放松。幽默能使你忘记痛苦。懂得幽默,压力就会减少;笑口常开,身体就更加健康。
   《英文笑话》从实用的角度入手选择的这些英语笑话 ,体现了英语国家的风俗民情和文化韵味,充满时代气息、能开阔读者的眼界,具有实用性和趣味性,便于读者学习

 

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  • 英文笑话:I Hope So 我希望如此

    Neighbor: Do you think your son will forget all he learned at college? Father: I hope so. He certainly can't make a living by kissing girls! 邻居:您认为您的儿子会把在大学里学的东西全忘光吗? 父亲:我希望这样--他当然...

  • 英文笑话:What's Going to Be? 做什么?

    Neighbor: What's your daughter going to be when she graduates? Mother: An old lady! 邻居:你女儿大学毕业后要做什么? 母亲:老太婆。...

  • 英文笑话:Who's Afraid Now? 是谁害怕?

    A neighbor told us about a trip he took with his two-and-a-half -year-old son. It was the first time the father and the boy had been away by themselves. The first night they spent in a hotel, the father moved his bed close to the boy's and when they...

  • 英文笑话:You Will Save Much More 你会省得更多

    You will be pleased with me today, mother, said Dick to his mother, coming home from school. I saved on fares. I didn't go to school by bus, I ran all the way after it. Well, said his mother laughing, Next time you should run after a taxi, you will...

  • 英文笑话:I'll Change My Name 我会改一个名字

    At the age of 16, Edely decided to leave home and join a theater company. His father was appalled, A son of mine on the stage? It's a disgrace! he wailed. What if the neighbors find out? I'll change my name, the comic-to-be volunteered. Change your...

  • 英文笑话:Thinking Back 回忆

    We were gathered together, all ten of us, for our widowed mother's 80th birthday. The conversation was of early struggles, walking to work and saving up in clothing clubs, when my elder sister said, Of course, we were bound to be poor because we wer...

  • 英文笑话:I'll Carry You Down 我会把您背下去

    My 15-year-old son came bounding in from school and found me in bed. Don't you feel well, Mom? he asked with concern. No, I don't, I said. Well, don't you worry about dinner, he reassured me. I'll carry you down to the stove. 我十五岁的儿子连跑带颠...

  • 英文笑话:Prize 奖品

    Little Albert came home from school with a new book under his arm. It's a prize, mother, he explained. A prize? What for, dear? For natural history. Teacher asked me how many legs an ostrich has, and I said three. But an ostrich has only two legs. I...

  • 英文笑话:She Ate All My Bait 她把所有的诱饵都吃了

    The young boy protested vigorously when his mother asked him to take his little sister along fishing. The last time she came, he objected, I didn't catch a single fish. I'll talk to her, his mother said, and I promise this time she won't make any no...

  • 英文笑话:Something I Didn't Do 我没做的事

    Mother: What are you crying for? Tommy: Teacher kept me in for something I didn't do. Mother: Something you didn't do? What was it? Tommy: M-m-my lessons. 妈妈:你哭什么? 汤米:老师为了一件我没做的事把我留下了。 妈妈:一件你没做的事?什么事? 汤米...

  • 英文笑话:Settle Down and Settle Up 一字之差

    When my brother, a notorious spender, came home for a visit, he told my father he was going to get married and settle down. Dad said, Why don't you stay single and settle up. 我的哥哥是个有名的挥霍者。他回家来时,告诉父亲说他要结婚了,要安定下来。父...

  • 英文笑话:A Thank-you Letter 感谢信

    Are you writing a thank-you letter to Grandpa like I told you? Yes, Mum. Your handwriting seems very large. Well, Grandpa's deaf, so I'm writing very loud. 你是在按照我说的给爷爷写信感谢他吗? 是的,妈妈。 你的字好象写得太大了。 嗯,爷爷的耳朵不好,...

  • 英文笑话:A School-report 学校成绩单

    The father was reading the school report which had just been handed to him by his hopeful son. His brow was wrathful as he read, English, poor; French, weak; mathematics, fair; and he gave a glance of disgust at the quaking lad. Well, Dad. said the...

  • 英文笑话:Is Ink So Expensive? 墨水很贵吗?

    Son: Is ink so very expensive, father? Father: Why, son, what makes you think so? Son: W...well. Mother seems quite disturbed because I spilled some on the carpet. 儿子:爸爸,墨水很贵吗? 父亲:不贵呀,你为什么这么想? 儿子:哦,我把墨水洒了一点在...

  • 英文笑话:It's Not My Fault 这不是我的过错

    Aren't you ashamed of yourself, Victor? You're the worst pupil in your class. Said the father. What's that got to do with me? Is it my fault that the worst one was yesterday transferred to another school? was the answer. 维克多,你是班里最差的学生。...

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