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10. Listen With Interest 10.带着兴趣去听
Being a good listener is one of the most important skills you can master if you want to advance your career and build meaningful relationships. 善于倾听是你能掌握的其中一项最重要技能,它能让你在事业上步步高升,也能让你拥有丰富的人脉资源。
Listening is more than keeping your mouth shut while the other person is talking. 倾听绝不是意味着别人在说话时你完全保持缄默。
When you REALLY listen, you demonstrate your interest in what is being said and you show your respect for the individual saying it. 如果你真的在听,你要表现出对谈话内容的兴趣,也要表现出对说话人的尊重。
When you are having a conversation with people they can instinctively1 tell how interested you really are in the conversation. 和别人交谈时对方能凭直觉感觉到你是否真的对本次谈话有兴趣。
This is communicated through your body language, the questions you ask and the expressions on your face. 这可以从你的肢体语言,你的提问和你的表情看出来。
This is easy for me if it’s a subject in which I am interested. If the subject is not of interest I have to be extra careful about how I am projecting myself. 如果我对话题感兴趣,要做到带着兴趣听并不难;但是如果不是我感兴趣的话题,我就必须额外努力适应话题。
11. Compliment Them 11.赞赏对方
When people take the time to offer you a sincere compliment, how does that make you feel about them? 当别人真的在对你白哦是赞赏时,你是什么感觉?
Are you naturally drawn2 to people who speak positively3 of you? I think we all are. 你是否对赞扬你的人产生好感?我想我们都会。
When you meet people and begin talking, look for the things in which you can compliment them. 当你和别人在一起谈话时,找些机会赞扬对方。
When you identify something, then look for the right time to offer your compliment with a feeling of genuineness and authenticity4. 当你同意对方观点时,就应把握时机给予别人你真心的赞扬。
When I am intentional5 about building relationships with people I am always look the little ways I can compliment or encourage them. 我在努力建立人脉资源的时候总会时不时赞扬一下对方,以表示激励。
12. Model Them 12.模仿他们
Have you ever noticed how you are drawn to people with whom you share things in common? 你有没有注意过这种情况:那些与你有有些相似的人会对你有某种吸引力?
This is called the law of attraction and means that you will inevitably6 attract to people with whom you share things in common. 这就是吸引力法则,意思是你生活圈子里的人总会在某些地方与你相像。
Modeling is a technique I learned from Anthony Robbins, which is when you mirror or match the non-verbal and verbal communication of others. 模仿是我从安东尼·罗宾斯那学来的一种技巧,就是学习他人的肢体语言或口头语言。
As an example, when I am around people who talk softly, then I moderate my voice and speak softly. 例如,当我身边的人说话都轻声细语的时候,我就会调整我的音量,也跟着轻声细语。
If they talk slowly, then I will do my best to match their speed and speak slowly. 如果他们说话慢条斯理,那我也会尽量减低语速,说话慢条斯理。
If they lean forward, I will wait a couple seconds then slowly lean forward. 如果他们身体前倾,几秒后我也会慢慢前倾。
Just remember, the more people intuitively feel you have in common, the more they will be attracted to you. 记住,人们越感觉和你有相似之处,你对他们的吸引力就越大。
This is again one of the most important things I focused on with every appointment I went on during my real estate career. 这也是我做地产中介时每次见客户时十分重视的一点。
If you will work on the 12 rapport8 accelerators I have shared with you over the last two days, people will be drawn to you like a magnet. 如果你用我前两天教给你的12个快速建立人际关系的方法,你就会像一块磁铁一样吸引许多人。
If you are intentional about using these lessons in your career, there is no doubt you will enjoy greater success. 如果你注意在你的工作中使用这些技巧,你会毫无疑问地取得成功。
If you use them in your personal life, you will build more meaningful relationships and become a more valued friend. 如果你把它们用在日常生活中,你的人脉资源会更丰富,你也会成为一个更值得交的朋友。
I want to challenge you to focus on these 12 lessons when meeting people this next week. 这是我的挑战:你在下周与人见面时用上这12种方法。
Let me also encourage you to learn more about each of these lessons by reading my related posts below this post on littlethingsmatter.com. 我也建议你读读我下面的相关文章,以对这些每一个方法都有更深入了解。
And remember,there are many circumstances where your speed of which you can connect with someone will influence the outcome you achieve. 请记住,很多情况下你和他人联络感情的快慢会影响到你办事的效率。
点击收听单词发音
1 instinctively | |
adv.本能地 | |
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2 drawn | |
v.拖,拉,拔出;adj.憔悴的,紧张的 | |
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3 positively | |
adv.明确地,断然,坚决地;实在,确实 | |
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4 authenticity | |
n.真实性 | |
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5 intentional | |
adj.故意的,有意(识)的 | |
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6 inevitably | |
adv.不可避免地;必然发生地 | |
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7 casually | |
adv.漠不关心地,无动于衷地,不负责任地 | |
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8 rapport | |
n.和睦,意见一致 | |
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