友谊基础瓦解

 　　Many of you were friends before you started dating and found yourself falling in love with each other. Nonetheless¹, once you find that things are not working out between the two of you and you let him know that you want to be “just friends,” you have to realize that things will possibly never be the same again.

　　许多人在开始约会之前，曾是好朋友，逐渐发现自己爱上了对方。尽管如此，一旦你发现你们两个之间并不是那么来电，你应该让他知道你只想和他做朋友，你不得不意识到你们之前的关系再也不会像以前一样了。

　　After all, too much water has run under the bridge and despite your effort to let him down easily, his ego² will most likely be bruised³ and if he loved you – he will be hurt. It is unfortunate to see the friendship dissolve, but if the two of you were not meant to be as a couple you have to say something and be honest about it.

　　毕竟，静水流深，尽管你努力还是让他很容易失落，他的自尊很可能会受伤，如果他爱你的话——他会很伤心。看到友情破裂确实很不幸，但是如果你们两个并不能成为一对，你必须说出来，要诚实面对你的感情。

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　　You do not have to be cruel, but you do owe him the decency⁴ of being open about why you feel it did not work. Do not hang onto something that no longer has the possibility to grow into something better and stronger; something that no longer has a potential and a future.

　　你不必很残忍，但是你欠他一个体面的敞开心扉的坦白，告诉他你为什么感觉你们不适合谈恋爱。不要紧紧抓住那些不可能再变好变强大的关系了，那种关系不再有可能性和未来。

　　If you hold on in order to save the friendship you will murder any chance of salvaging⁵ all the good aspects of the relationship. The relationship will turn into something more unpleasant and toxic⁶ for the both of you and you will start resenting⁷ each other.

　　如果你为了拯救友情而坚持，你会毁掉任何拯救友情中所有美好方面的机会。你们之间会演变成某种更不开心有毒的关系，你们会开始仇恨对方。

　　You have to decide how important this person is for you and how much you care about him. Is he important enough for you to try and stay friends? Do you care enough about him to allow him to find happiness somewhere else?

　　你必须决定这个人对你有多重要，你到底多么关心他。他是否重要到值得你去努力挽留友情？你对他的关心是否允许他在其他地方找到幸福?

1 nonetheless   

adv.尽管如此，依然，然而

参考例句：

• Though he's fool,I like him nonetheless.虽然他很笨，我仍然喜欢他。
• His face is serious but nonetheless very friendly.他一脸严肃，但还是非常友好。

2 ego   

n.自我，自己，自尊

参考例句：

• He is absolute ego in all thing.在所有的事情上他都绝对自我。
• She has been on an ego trip since she sang on television.她上电视台唱过歌之后就一直自吹自擂。

3 bruised   

[医]青肿的，瘀紫的

参考例句：

• his bruised and bloodied nose 他沾满血的青肿的鼻子
• She had slipped and badly bruised her face. 她滑了一跤，摔得鼻青脸肿。

4 decency   

n.体面，得体，合宜，正派，庄重

参考例句：

• His sense of decency and fair play made him refuse the offer.他的正直感和公平竞争意识使他拒绝了这一提议。
• Your behaviour is an affront to public decency.你的行为有伤风化。

5 salvaging   

（从火灾、海难等中）抢救（某物）( salvage的现在分词 )； 回收利用（某物）

参考例句：

• A shipping company has made a claim for the cost of salvaging a sunken ship. 某轮船公司要求赔赏打捞沉船的费用。（make a claim 要求）
• It is not uncommon to hear that a shipping company has made a claim for the cost of salvaging a sunken ship. 航运公司为打捞沉船的费用而提出要求，这并非奇闻。

6 toxic   

adj.有毒的，因中毒引起的

参考例句：

• The factory had accidentally released a quantity of toxic waste into the sea.这家工厂意外泄漏大量有毒废物到海中。
• There is a risk that toxic chemicals might be blasted into the atmosphere.爆炸后有毒化学物质可能会进入大气层。

7 resenting   

对…感到愤怒( resent的现在分词 )

参考例句：

• Far from resenting such tutelage, I am only too glad to avail myself of it. 我决不憎恨这种教育，相反，我十分高兴对它加以利用。
• "I've been sick, I told you," he said, peevishly, almost resenting her excessive pity. “我生了一场病，我告诉过你了，"他没好气地说，对她的过分怜悯几乎产生了怨恨。 来自英汉文学 - 嘉莉妹妹