Once a circle missed a wedge. The circle wanted to be whole, so it went around looking for its missing piece. But because it was incomplete and therefore could roll only very slowly, it admired the flowers along the way. It chatted with worms. It enjoyed the sunshine. It found lots of different pieces, but none of them fit. So it left them all by the side of the road and kept on searching. Then one day the circle found a piece that fit perfectly1. It was so happy. Now it could be whole, with nothing missing. It incorporated the missing piece into itself and began to roll. Now that it was a perfect circle, it could roll very fast, too fast to notice flowers or talk to the worms. When it realized how different the world seemed when it rolled so quickly, it stopped, left its found piece by the side of the road and rolled slowly away.
The lesson of the story, I suggested, was that in some strange sense we are more whole when we are missing something. The man who has everything is in some ways a poor man. He will never know what it feels like to
yearn2, to hope, to nourish his soul with the dream of something better. He will never know the experience of having someone who loves him give him something he has always wanted or never had.
There is a wholeness about the person who has come to terms with his limitations, who has been brave enough to let go of his unrealistic dreams and not feel like a failure for doing so. There is a wholeness about the man or woman who has learned that he or she is strong enough to go through a tragedy and survive, he or she can lose someone and still feel like a complete person.
Life is not a trap set for us by God so that he can
condemn3 us for failing. Life is not a spelling puzzle, where no matter how many words you?ve gotten right, you're disqualified if you make one mistake. Life is more like a baseball season, where even the best team loses one third of its games and even the worst team has its days of
brilliance4. Our goal is to win more games than we lose.
When we accept that imperfection is part of human, and when we can continue rolling through life and appreciate it, we will have achieved a wholeness that others can only
aspire5 to. That, I believe, is what God asks of us—not “Be perfect”, not “Don't even make a mistake”, but “Be whole.”
If we are brave enough to love, strong enough to forgive, generous enough to rejoice in another's happiness, and wise enough to know there is enough love to go around for us all, then we can achieve a fulfillment that no other living creature will ever know.
从前,一个圆圈缺了一块楔子。它想保持完整,便四处寻找那块楔子。由于不完整,所以它只能慢慢地滚动。一路上,它对花儿露出羡慕之色;它与蠕虫谈天侃地;它还欣赏到了阳光之美。圆圈找到了许多不同的楔子,但没有一件与它相配。所以,它将它们统统弃置路旁,继续寻觅。终于有一天,它找到了一个完美的配件。圆圈是那样的高兴,现在它可以说是完美无缺了。它装好缺失的那部分,并开始滚动起来。现在它已成了一个完美的圆圈,所以滚动得非常快,以至于难以欣赏花儿,也无暇与蠕虫倾诉心声。当圆圈意识到因快速疾驰而失去了原有的世界时,它停了下来,将找到的配件弃置路旁,又开始慢慢地滚动。
我觉得这个故事告诉我们,从某种奇妙的意义上讲,当我们失去一些东西时反而更加完美。一个拥有一切的人其实在某个方面是个穷人。他永远体会不到什么是渴望、期待及如何用美好的梦想滋养自己的灵魂。他也永远不会有这样一种体验:一个爱他的人送给他某种梦寐以求的或者从未拥有过的东西,意味着什么。
人生的完整性在于知道如何面对缺陷,如何勇敢地摒弃不现实的幻想而又不以此为缺憾;人生的完整性还在于学会勇敢面对人生悲剧而继续活下去,能够在失去亲人后依然表现出完整的个人风范。
人生不是上帝为谴责我们的缺陷而给我们布下的陷阱。人生也不是一场拼字游戏比赛,不管你拼出多少单词,一旦出现了一个错误,你便前功尽弃。人生更像是一个棒球赛季,即使最好的球队也会输掉1/3的比赛,而最差的球队也有春风得意的日子。我们的目标就是多赢球、少输球。
当我们接受不完整性是人类本性的一部分,当我们不断地滚动前行并能欣赏其价值时,我们就会获得其他人仅能渴望的完整人生。我相信这就是上帝对我们的要求:不求“完美”,也不求“不犯错误”,而是求得人生的“完整”。
如果我们勇敢得能够去爱,坚强得能够宽容,大度得能够去为别人的快乐而高兴,明智得能够理解身边充满爱,那么我们就能取得别人所不能取得的成就。