【英语时差8,16】为自私的母亲背债

Dear Annie:

I am 24 years old and in considerable debt due to my mother. I didn't want to press charges, so I'm struggling to pay it off. I am planning to be married next year, and my fiancé is helping¹ me financially.

Despite the situation, my mother comes crying to us anytime anything is wrong or she needs money. I just graduated from college after putting it off in order to work full time and pay down the debt. But when I invited her to attend the graduation ceremony, she said, "I have to sit through the whole thing? I have a life, too, you know."

I'm tired of overlooking her faults while she doesn't care about anything I do. After every conversation with her, I feel miserable², and it has put a lot of stress on my relationship with my fiancé. What do I do? － Tired of Being the Parent

Dear Tired:

Try to accept your mother's limitations because, frankly³, she isn't capable of being less self-involved. Instead, learn to set boundaries and keep an emotional distance so you aren't sucked into her guilt-laden vortex. Don't spend more time with her than you can handle. You aren't responsible for solving her problems. Counseling might help you find a way to maintain a relationship without so much misery⁴.

1 helping   

n.食物的一份&adj.帮助人的，辅助的

参考例句：

• The poor children regularly pony up for a second helping of my hamburger. 那些可怜的孩子们总是要求我把我的汉堡包再给他们一份。
• By doing this, they may at times be helping to restore competition. 这样一来, 他在某些时候,有助于竞争的加强。

2 miserable   

adj.悲惨的，痛苦的；可怜的，糟糕的

参考例句：

• It was miserable of you to make fun of him.你取笑他，这是可耻的。
• Her past life was miserable.她过去的生活很苦。

3 frankly   

adv.坦白地，直率地；坦率地说

参考例句：

• To speak frankly, I don't like the idea at all.老实说，我一点也不赞成这个主意。
• Frankly speaking, I'm not opposed to reform.坦率地说，我不反对改革。

4 misery   

n.痛苦，苦恼，苦难；悲惨的境遇，贫苦

参考例句：

• Business depression usually causes misery among the working class.商业不景气常使工薪阶层受苦。
• He has rescued me from the mire of misery.他把我从苦海里救了出来。