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(单词翻译:双击或拖选)
It Can't Happen Here
by Sinclair Lewis
Chapter 16
I have no desire to be President. I would much rather do my humble1 best as a supporter of Bishop2 Prang, Ted3 Bilbo, Gene4 Talmadge or any other broad-gauged but peppy Liberal. My only longing5 is to Serve.
Zero Hour, Berzelius Windrip.
Like many bachelors given to vigorous hunting and riding, Buck6 Titus was a fastidious housekeeper7, and his mid-Victorian farmhouse8 fussily9 neat. It was also pleasantly bare: the living room a monastic hall of heavy oak chairs, tables free of dainty covers, numerous and rather solemn books of history and exploration, with the conventional "sets," and a tremendous fireplace of rough stone. And the ash trays were solid pottery10 and pewter, able to cope with a whole evening of cigarette-smoking. The whisky stood honestly on the oak buffet11, with siphons, and with cracked ice always ready in a thermos12 jug13.
It would, however, have been too much to expect Buck Titus not to have red-and-black imitation English hunting-prints.
This hermitage, always grateful to Doremus, was sanctuary14 now, and only with Buck could he adequately damn Windrip & Co. and people like Francis Tasbrough, who in February was still saying, "Yes, things do look kind of hectic15 down there in Washington, but that's just because there's so many of these bullheaded politicians that still think they can buck Windrip. Besides, anyway, things like that couldn't ever happen here in New England."
And, indeed, as Doremus went on his lawful16 occasions past the red-brick Georgian houses, the slender spires17 of old white churches facing the Green, as he heard the lazy irony18 of familiar greetings from his acquaintances, men as enduring as their Vermont hills, it seemed to him that the madness in the capital was as alien and distant and unimportant as an earthquake in Tibet.
Constantly, in the Informer, he criticized the government but not too acidly.
The hysteria can't last; be patient, and wait and see, he counseled his readers.
It was not that he was afraid of the authorities. He simply did not believe that this comic tyranny could endure. It can't happen here, said even Doremus--even now.
The one thing that most perplexed19 him was that there could be a dictator seemingly so different from the fervent20 Hitlers and gesticulating Fascists21 and the Cæsars with laurels22 round bald domes23; a dictator with something of the earthy American sense of humor of a Mark Twain, a George Ade, a Will Rogers, an Artemus Ward24. Windrip could be ever so funny about solemn jaw-drooping opponents, and about the best method of training what he called "a Siamese flea25 hound." Did that, puzzled Doremus, make him less or more dangerous?
Then he remembered the most cruel-mad of all pirates, Sir Henry Morgan, who had thought it ever so funny to sew a victim up in wet rawhide26 and watch it shrink in the sun.
From the perseverance27 with which they bickered28, you could tell that Buck Titus and Lorinda were much fonder of each other than they would admit. Being a person who read little and therefore took what he did read seriously, Buck was distressed29 by the normally studious Lorinda's vacation liking30 for novels about distressed princesses, and when she airily insisted that they were better guides to conduct than Anthony Trollope or Thomas Hardy31, Buck roared at her and, in the feebleness of baited strength, nervously32 filled pipes and knocked them out against the stone mantel. But he approved of the relationship between Doremus and Lorinda, which only he (and Shad Ledue!) had guessed, and over Doremus, ten years his senior, this shaggy-headed woodsman fussed like a thwarted33 spinster.
To both Doremus and Lorinda, Buck's overgrown shack34 became their refuge. And they needed it, late in February, five weeks or thereabouts after Windrip's election.
Despite strikes and riots all over the country, bloodily35 put down by the Minute Men, Windrip's power in Washington was maintained. The most liberal four members of the Supreme36 Court resigned and were replaced by surprisingly unknown lawyers who called President Windrip by his first name. A number of Congressmen were still being "protected" in the District of Columbia jail; others had seen the blinding light forever shed by the goddess Reason and happily returned to the Capitol. The Minute Men were increasingly loyal--they were still unpaid37 volunteers, but provided with "expense accounts" considerably38 larger than the pay of the regular troops. Never in American history had the adherents39 of a President been so well satisfied; they were not only appointed to whatever political jobs there were but to ever so many that really were not; and with such annoyances40 as Congressional Investigations41 hushed, the official awarders of contracts were on the merriest of terms with all contractors42. . . . One veteran lobbyist for steel corporations complained that there was no more sport in his hunting--you were not only allowed but expected to shoot all government purchasing-agents sitting.
None of the changes was so publicized as the Presidential mandate43 abruptly44 ending the separate existence of the different states, and dividing the whole country into eight "provinces"--thus, asserted Windrip, economizing45 by reducing the number of governors and all other state officers and, asserted Windrip's enemies, better enabling him to concentrate his private army and hold the country.
The new "Northeastern Province" included all of New York State north of a line through Ossining, and all of New England except a strip of Connecticut shore as far east as New Haven46. This was, Doremus admitted, a natural and homogeneous division, and even more natural seemed the urban and industrial "Metropolitan47 Province," which included Greater New York, Westchester County up to Ossining, Long Island, the strip of Connecticut dependent on New York City, New Jersey48, northern Delaware, and Pennsylvania as far as Reading and Scranton.
Each province was divided into numbered districts, each district into lettered counties, each county into townships and cities, and only in these last did the old names, with their traditional appeal, remain to endanger President Windrip by memories of honorable local history. And it was gossiped that, next, the government would change even the town names--that they were already thinking fondly of calling New York "Berzelian" and San Francisco "San Sarason." Probably that gossip was false.
The Northeastern Province's six districts were: 1, Upper New York State west of and including Syracuse; 2, New York east of it; 3, Vermont and New Hampshire; 4, Maine; 5, Massachusetts; 6, Rhode Island and the unraped portion of Connecticut.
District 3, Doremus Jessup's district, was divided into the four "counties" of southern and northern Vermont, and southern and northern New Hampshire, with Hanover for capital--the District Commissioner49 merely chased the Dartmouth students out and took over the college buildings for his offices, to the considerable approval of Amherst, Williams, and Yale.
So Doremus was living, now, in Northeastern Province, District 3, County B, township of Beulah, and over him for his admiration50 and rejoicing were a provincial51 commissioner, a district commissioner, a county commissioner, an assistant county commissioner in charge of Beulah Township, and all their appertaining M.M. guards and emergency military judges.
Citizens who had lived in any one state for more than ten years seemed to resent more hotly the loss of that state's identity than they did the castration of the Congress and Supreme Court of the United States--indeed, they resented it almost as much as the fact that, while late January, February, and most of March went by, they still were not receiving their governmental gifts of $5000 (or perhaps it would beautifully be $10,000) apiece; had indeed received nothing more than cheery bulletins from Washington to the effect that the "Capital Levy52 Board," or C.L.B. was holding sessions.
Virginians whose grandfathers had fought beside Lee shouted that they'd be damned if they'd give up the hallowed state name and form just one arbitrary section of an administrative53 unit containing eleven Southern states; San Franciscans who had considered Los Angelinos even worse than denizens54 of Miami now wailed55 with agony when California was sundered56 and the northern portion lumped in with Oregon, Nevada, and others as the "Mountain and Pacific Province," while southern California was, without her permission, assigned to the Southwestern Province, along with Arizona, New Mexico, Texas, Oklahoma, and Hawaii. As some hint of Buzz Windrip's vision for the future, it was interesting to read that this Southwestern Province was also to be permitted to claim "all portions of Mexico which the United States may from time to time find it necessary to take over, as a protection against the notorious treachery of Mexico and the Jewish plots there hatched."
"Lee Sarason is even more generous than Hitler and Alfred Rosenberg in protecting the future of other countries," sighed Doremus.
As Provincial Commissioner of the Northeastern Province, comprising Upper New York State and New England, was appointed Colonel Dewey Haik, that soldier-lawyer-politician-aviator who was the chilliest-blooded and most arrogant57 of all the satellites of Windrip yet had so captivated miners and fishermen during the campaign. He was a strong-flying eagle who liked his meat bloody58. As District Commissioner of District 3--Vermont and New Hampshire--appeared, to Doremus's mingled59 derision and fury, none other than John Sullivan Reek60, that stuffiest61 of stuffed-shirts, that most gaseous62 gas bag, that most amenable63 machine politician of Northern New England; a Republican ex-governor who had, in the alembic of Windrip's patriotism64, rosily65 turned Leaguer.
No one had ever troubled to be obsequious66 to the Hon. J. S. Reek, even when he had been Governor. The weediest back-country Representative had called him "Johnny," in the gubernatorial mansion67 (twelve rooms and a leaky roof); and the youngest reporter had bawled68, "Well, what bull you handing out today, Ex?"
It was this Commissioner Reek who summoned all the editors in his district to meet him at his new viceregal lodge69 in Dartmouth Library and receive the precious privileged information as to how much President Windrip and his subordinate commissioners70 admired the gentlemen of the press.
Before he left for the press conference in Hanover, Doremus received from Sissy a "poem"--at least she called it that--which Buck Titus, Lorinda Pike, Julian Falck, and she had painfully composed, late at night, in Buck's fortified71 manor72 house:
Go fake with Haik.
And t' other with snake.
Is on the make,
But Sullivan Reek--
Oh God!
"Well, anyway, Windrip's put everybody to work. And he's driven all these unsightly billboards76 off the highways--much better for the tourist trade," said all the old editors, even those who wondered if the President wasn't perhaps the least bit arbitrary.
As he drove to Hanover, Doremus saw hundreds of huge billboards by the road. But they bore only Windrip propaganda and underneath77, "with the compliments of a loyal firm" and--very large--"Montgomery Cigarettes" or "Jonquil Foot Soap." On the short walk from a parking-space to the former Dartmouth campus, three several men muttered to him, "Give us a nickel for cuppa coffee, Boss--a Minnie Mouse has got my job and the Mouses won't take me--they say I'm too old." But that may have been propaganda from Moscow.
On the long porch of the Hanover Inn, officers of the Minute Men were reclining in deck chairs, their spurred boots (in all the M.M. organization there was no cavalry) up on the railing.
Doremus passed a science building in front of which was a pile of broken laboratory glassware, and in one stripped laboratory he could see a small squad78 of M.M.'s drilling.
District Commissioner John Sullivan Reek affectionately received the editors in a classroom. . . . Old men, used to being revered79 as prophets, sitting anxiously in trifling80 chairs, facing a fat man in the uniform of an M.M. commander, who smoked an unmilitary cigar as his pulpy81 hand waved greeting.
Reek took not more than an hour to relate what would have taken the most intelligent man five or six hours--that is, five minutes of speech and the rest of the five hours to recover from the nausea82 caused by having to utter such shameless rot. . . . President Windrip, Secretary of State Sarason, Provincial Commissioner Haik, and himself, John Sullivan Reek, they were all being misrepresented by the Republicans, the Jeffersonians, the Communists, England, the Nazis83, and probably the jute and herring industries; and what the government wanted was for any reporter to call on any member of this Administration, and especially on Commissioner Reek, at any time--except perhaps between 3 and 7 A.M.--and "get the real low-down."
Excellency Reek announced, then: "And now, gentlemen, I am giving myself the privilege of introducing you to all four of the County Commissioners, who were just chosen yesterday. Probably each of you will know personally the commissioner from your own county, but I want you to intimately and cooperatively know all four, because, whomever they may be, they join with me in my unquenchable admiration of the press."
The four County Commissioners, as one by one they shambled into the room and were introduced, seemed to Doremus an oddish lot: A moth-eaten lawyer known more for his quotations84 from Shakespeare and Robert W. Service than for his shrewdness before a jury. He was luminously85 bald except for a prickle of faded rusty86 hair, but you felt that, if he had his rights, he would have the floating locks of a tragedian of 1890.
A battling clergyman famed for raiding roadhouses.
A rather shy workman, an authentic87 proletarian, who seemed surprised to find himself there. (He was replaced, a month later, by a popular osteopath with an interest in politics and vegetarianism88.)
The fourth dignitary to come in and affectionately bow to the editors, a bulky man, formidable-looking in his uniform as a battalion89 leader of Minute Men, introduced as the Commissioner for northern Vermont, Doremus Jessup's county, was Mr. Oscar Ledue, formerly90 known as "Shad."
Mr. Reek called him "Captain" Ledue. Doremus remembered that Shad's only military service, prior to Windrip's election, had been as an A.E.F. private who had never got beyond a training-camp in America and whose fiercest experience in battle had been licking a corporal when in liquor.
"Mr. Jessup," bubbled the Hon. Mr. Reek, "I imagine you must have met Captain Ledue--comes from your charming city."
"Uh-uh-ur," said Doremus.
"Sure," said Captain Ledue. "I've met old Jessup, all right, all right! He don't know what it's all about. He don't know the first thing about the economics of our social Revolution. He's a Cho-vinis. But he isn't such a bad old coot, and I'll let him ride as long as he behaves himself!"
"Splendid!" said the Hon. Mr. Reek.
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1
humble
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| adj.谦卑的，恭顺的；地位低下的；v.降低，贬低 | |
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bishop
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| n.主教，（国际象棋）象 | |
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ted
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| vt.翻晒，撒，撒开 | |
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gene
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| n.遗传因子，基因 | |
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longing
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| n.（for）渴望 | |
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buck
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| n.雄鹿，雄兔；v.马离地跳跃 | |
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housekeeper
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| n.管理家务的主妇，女管家 | |
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farmhouse
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| n.农场住宅（尤指主要住房） | |
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fussily
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| adv.无事空扰地，大惊小怪地，小题大做地 | |
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pottery
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| n.陶器，陶器场 | |
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buffet
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| n.自助餐；饮食柜台；餐台 | |
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thermos
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| n.保湿瓶，热水瓶 | |
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jug
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| n.(有柄，小口，可盛水等的)大壶，罐，盂 | |
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sanctuary
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| n.圣所，圣堂，寺庙；禁猎区，保护区 | |
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hectic
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| adj.肺病的；消耗热的；发热的；闹哄哄的 | |
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lawful
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| adj.法律许可的，守法的，合法的 | |
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spires
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| n.（教堂的） 塔尖，尖顶( spire的名词复数 ) | |
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irony
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| n.反语，冷嘲；具有讽刺意味的事，嘲弄 | |
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perplexed
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| adj.不知所措的 | |
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fervent
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| adj.热的，热烈的，热情的 | |
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fascists
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| n.法西斯主义的支持者( fascist的名词复数 ) | |
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laurels
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| n.桂冠，荣誉 | |
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domes
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| n.圆屋顶( dome的名词复数 )；像圆屋顶一样的东西；圆顶体育场 | |
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ward
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| n.守卫，监护，病房，行政区，由监护人或法院保护的人（尤指儿童）；vt.守护，躲开 | |
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flea
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| n.跳蚤 | |
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rawhide
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| n.生牛皮 | |
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perseverance
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| n.坚持不懈，不屈不挠 | |
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bickered
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| v.争吵( bicker的过去式和过去分词 )；口角；（水等）作潺潺声；闪烁 | |
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distressed
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| 痛苦的 | |
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liking
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| n.爱好；嗜好；喜欢 | |
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hardy
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| adj.勇敢的，果断的，吃苦的；耐寒的 | |
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nervously
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| adv.神情激动地，不安地 | |
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thwarted
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| 阻挠( thwart的过去式和过去分词 )； 使受挫折； 挫败； 横过 | |
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shack
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| adj.简陋的小屋，窝棚 | |
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bloodily
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| adv.出血地；血淋淋地；残忍地；野蛮地 | |
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supreme
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| adj.极度的，最重要的；至高的，最高的 | |
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unpaid
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| adj.未付款的，无报酬的 | |
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considerably
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| adv.极大地；相当大地；在很大程度上 | |
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adherents
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| n.支持者，拥护者( adherent的名词复数 )；党羽；徒子徒孙 | |
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annoyances
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| n.恼怒( annoyance的名词复数 )；烦恼；打扰；使人烦恼的事 | |
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investigations
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| （正式的）调查( investigation的名词复数 )； 侦查； 科学研究； 学术研究 | |
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contractors
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| n.（建筑、监造中的）承包人( contractor的名词复数 ) | |
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mandate
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| n.托管地；命令，指示 | |
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abruptly
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| adv.突然地，出其不意地 | |
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economizing
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| v.节省，减少开支( economize的现在分词 ) | |
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haven
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| n.安全的地方，避难所，庇护所 | |
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metropolitan
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| adj.大城市的，大都会的 | |
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jersey
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| n.运动衫 | |
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commissioner
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| n.（政府厅、局、处等部门）专员，长官，委员 | |
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admiration
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| n.钦佩，赞美，羡慕 | |
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51
provincial
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| adj.省的，地方的；n．外省人，乡下人 | |
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52
levy
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| n.征收税或其他款项，征收额 | |
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administrative
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| adj.行政的，管理的 | |
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denizens
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| n.居民，住户( denizen的名词复数 ) | |
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wailed
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| v.哭叫，哀号( wail的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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sundered
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| v.隔开，分开( sunder的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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arrogant
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| adj.傲慢的，自大的 | |
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bloody
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| adj.非常的的；流血的；残忍的；adv.很；vt.血染 | |
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mingled
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| 混合，混入( mingle的过去式和过去分词 )； 混进，与…交往[联系] | |
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reek
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| v.发出臭气；n.恶臭 | |
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stuffiest
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| adj.空气不好的( stuffy的最高级 )；通风不好的；（观点、举止）陈腐的；鼻塞的 | |
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gaseous
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| adj.气体的，气态的 | |
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amenable
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| adj.经得起检验的；顺从的；对负有义务的 | |
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patriotism
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| n.爱国精神，爱国心，爱国主义 | |
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rosily
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| adv.带玫瑰色地，乐观地 | |
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obsequious
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| adj.谄媚的，奉承的，顺从的 | |
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mansion
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| n.大厦，大楼；宅第 | |
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bawled
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| v.大叫，大喊( bawl的过去式和过去分词 )；放声大哭；大声叫出；叫卖（货物） | |
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lodge
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| v.临时住宿，寄宿，寄存，容纳；n.传达室，小旅馆 | |
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commissioners
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| n.专员( commissioner的名词复数 )；长官；委员；政府部门的长官 | |
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fortified
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| adj. 加强的 | |
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manor
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| n.庄园，领地 | |
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meek
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| adj.温顺的，逆来顺受的 | |
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sneak
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| vt.潜行(隐藏,填石缝)；偷偷摸摸做；n.潜行；adj.暗中进行 | |
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75
beak
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| n.鸟嘴，茶壶嘴，钩形鼻 | |
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76
billboards
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| n.广告牌( billboard的名词复数 ) | |
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77
underneath
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| adj.在...下面，在...底下；adv.在下面 | |
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78
squad
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| n.班，小队，小团体；vt.把…编成班或小组 | |
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79
revered
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| v.崇敬，尊崇，敬畏( revere的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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80
trifling
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| adj.微不足道的；没什么价值的 | |
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81
pulpy
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| 果肉状的，多汁的，柔软的； 烂糊； 稀烂 | |
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82
nausea
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| n.作呕，恶心；极端的憎恶(或厌恶) | |
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83
Nazis
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| n.（德国的）纳粹党员( Nazi的名词复数 )；纳粹主义 | |
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84
quotations
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| n.引用( quotation的名词复数 )；[商业]行情（报告）；（货物或股票的）市价；时价 | |
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85
luminously
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| 发光的； 明亮的； 清楚的； 辉赫 | |
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86
rusty
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| adj.生锈的；锈色的；荒废了的 | |
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87
authentic
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| a.真的，真正的；可靠的，可信的，有根据的 | |
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88
vegetarianism
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| n.素食，素食主义 | |
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89
battalion
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| n.营；部队；大队(的人) | |
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90
formerly
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| adv.从前，以前 | |
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