豆知识 2009-12-06&12-12 在爱情关系中建立信任

 Hi, I'm Donna Barnes. I’m a Life and Relationship Coach and owner of N.Y. Dating Coach in New York City.

 

In this clip¹ we'll talk about how to build trust in a relationship. And that's exactly what you do. You have to build trust. Trust has to be earned. I like to say when you first meet somebody you can give them the benefit of the doubt, but that's not trust yet. You have to go through time together and experience situations and find out if you can truly trust them. So that means when you first get into a relationship, don't reveal too much about yourself. Don't put your whole life out there on the table for this person in the first meeting; you don't know if that's safe with them. Power is knowledge. Don't give yourself away.

 

So if you really want to build trust in your relationship. You need to communicate. You need to talk to each other. You need to establish boundaries and guidelines² of what you're comfortable with. And as you go through things, if something is upsetting you, take the time and say “Hey, could we talk about this? I’m, I'm feeling a little insecure about this. I'm feeling a little bothered.” And if you can build that over time, that's genuine trust. 

 

I'm Donna Barnes, Life and Relationship Coach in New York City.

1 clip   

n.夹子，别针，弹夹，片断；vt.夹住，修剪

参考例句：

• May I clip out the report on my performance?我能把报道我的文章剪下来吗？
• She fastened the papers together with a paper clip.她用曲别针把文件别在一起。

2 guidelines   

n.指导方针，准则

参考例句：

• The government has drawn up guidelines on the treatment of the mentally ill. 政府制订了对待精神病人的指导方针。
• Planners seem a little uncomfortable with the current government guidelines. 规划师似乎不太接受现行的政府指道方针。